An anonymous readers has asked for tips for surviving Mothers' Day for single moms.
I think that they key is to identify and acknowledge what you're feeling. For some of us, Mothers' Day is better for being single, while for others of us it's worse, and for others it's just different.
I'm in the "better" category, and I figured out why years ago: I had such traditional and high expectations of Mothers' Day and those were never met, and then I felt hurt and defeated. Once I was single, I knew Mothers' Day was only what I made of it. So I bought myself a present (so I knew I'd like it), told the kids they were taking me to brunch (but I actually paid, as 6 and 3-year-olds don't usually have money), and told them how lucky I was to have them. Now that they're older they aren't having any of my buying myself a guft but pretending it's from them anymore. But now they make me sweet cards and drawings, and we still go to brunch, and they let me take a nap.
I also know some single moms who make it as different as possible by planning a day together with their kids, so it's not at all focused on just the individual moms but on the moms as a group and the kids as a group. I think this is a stellar idea.
It's the single moms who feel it's worse than when/if they were not single that I feel for. (Almost as much as I feel for women who have never been able to become moms but who wanted to on Mothers' Day.) I am wondering if there are ways to make it an easier day for them. One idea would be to invite them and their children into your own Mothers' Day plans so they're not the only adult for the day. Another idea would be to make sure their children have the time and supplies to make them cards or presents for that day, since kids want to give their mothers something but can't always do it on their own.
Can you think of other ideas? Single moms who hate being single on Mothers' Day, how do you make the day OK for yourself? What do you wish someone else would do for you?
Moms who aren't single on Mothers' Day, what do you enjoy about the day? What do you wish were different?
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