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Comments

kimu

oooo, tough match ups today!

wealhtheow

I'm calling either GERD or food allergy for the win.

Elisabeth

ooh - I think Wealhtheow may be right.

Angela

I still can't believe that 3.5 year old lost. I figured that would be the winner!

Jessie

Food allergy is my worst nightmare. I don't know how people do it. Anyone dealing with that has my utmost respect.

Sharon

Nanny quits vs. losing frozen breastmilk was my toughest match up yet -- to me, though should have both been in the championship game!

Brooke

Nanny quits vs. losing frozen milk is hard for me. Which is worse depends so much on other circumstances which were different between my kids and at their varying ages. Either would suck so very, very much.

Tonia

I am so with Jessie on the food allergies. I have a friend whose child has multiple food allergies, including wheat AND dairy, and I don't think I would every recover from the fear that I would screw up some detail and kill my child. BTW, my friend, who is far more organized and detail-oriented than I, handles it beautifully.

(On the other hand, I always said I absolutely could not deal with needles and I know have a child with Type 1 diabetes, so I guess you really do just suck it up and deal with what you get.)

SarcastiCarrie

We are battling persistent weeping diaper rash (and the weeping is the key since no creams or concoctions stick to skin that is weeping). It is not fun. I voted for it. GERD might be bad, but I know this is bad for sure.

For my breastmilk stash to be taken out by a power outage, the power would have to be out for 4 days. After 4 days with no power, I think I would have other issues that would make the loss of milk just one of many injustices.

Betsy

Food Allergies. They are the almighty suck. They suck time, money and your sanity. And watching your child suffer and knowing that this will go on for YEARS if not his lifetime - I would take all the others AT ONCE if it would take away his allergies.

Tine

Food allergy is totally going to win. I cannot imagine anything that would terrify me more as a parent.

alex

I understand why food allergies are so scary to folks, but as someone with a baby with very intense GERD, I'd take food allergies any day. At least a food allergy you can, actually, manage. GERD, on the other hand... the puke all over everything you own is the least of it. The wailing at all hours, day and night. The screaming WHILE breastfeeding broke my heart. And none of that was as bad as watching my baby gain such little weight, day after day, week after week, month after month - so that he went from 50% to below 1% on the growth chart over the course of 6 months. So scary. Would have loved to know that I could just cut out a food and he'd be okay.

Lisa

Having faced some flavor of each of these but GERD and persistent diaper rash (which both sound awful), I'm coming to 2 realizations:

What you haven't faced often seems the scariest - and what you have to face can often be managed even as it sucks.

We've really narrowed down to things that make one's child suffer - and seeing your child suffer, fearing you can do little or nothing to help is one of the worst experiences in parenting.

Sheila

My toddler had food allergies that he grew out of. He was milk soy protein intolerant. (MSPI) Plus couldn't tolerate citrus, banana, or avocado. I nursed him and had to stick to the diet. It was really hard at first - but I'm doing it again for my next baby to be born really soon. Much easier this time. My first is still allergic to peanuts and treenuts but not in a life threatening way.

The thing with MSPI is - a lot of kids who suffer from MSPI also have GERD. My kiddo had terrible GERD and was on meds to protect his tissue.

SO - its a toss up for me! I only know them going hand in hand!

Brooke

I also think that some of these are so terrible in the moment, but, thankfully, the memories fade.

Vacationland Mom

Partner can't soothe baby has been a tough one for us, not sure if it's real or just my control-freakiness, but it's made things difficult at best, and horrid between my husband and I at worst. I still have a hard time relinquishing control to allow him to take over when my son is crying or something. BUT as a person who has had food allergies since I was little (and asthma) I can empathize with both sides of the coin, and I worry all the time that my child will someday have them. I wasn't diagnosed until I was 5 or so. My son currently eats all kinds of things with no discernible negative reactions, so I'm hoping he's inherited his father's lack of allergies/sensitivities.

Wilhelmina

My daughter has food allergies, came Free with the Eczema she was born with pretty much. But she's very tall, and eats a lot of food she enjoys and has grown very, very steadily.

So we have no dairy, egg, peanut, strawberries, annatto and the big one the Chili pepper family. Or rather its seeds.

But there's still a lot to eat. And she was so happy on the boob and so contented.

GERD seems so horrible to me.

That said we had to blue light our 18 month old to hospital with anaphylactic shock. To bell pepper in salad. And we managed really well. As a bonus the eczema improved a lot to more managed.

Last Christmas my daughter, now four, was offered a vegan dark chocolate. She loves dark chocolate.

And then she got very distressed and her lips started swelling and it turned out it had whole ground chili in it. The chocolate. Logically it was 1% of a very small bit she spat out. So we gave her the antihistamine and watched, epipens and phones at the ready. It went away. And we could skip the hospital challenge for peppers. We tested in the field.Inadvertently. Now everywhere I see peppers and we've not eaten out at all since. We did rarely but not now. Nothing has actually changed but we're spooked.

My friend was with us and she said both of us parents went absolutely grey.

Perhaps pitting GERD against Food allergies is like choosing hanging over being shot.

I dare say that parents will ultimately cope. With what's thrown at each of us.

wealhtheow

SarcastiCarrie, we had some pretty bad diaper rash, and it wasn't fun at all. But my kid was out of diapers by 3. At 4.5, I am STILL dealing with the repercussions of GERD in terms of his unbelievable reluctance to try ANY new foods, his fear of fruit and other acidic foods, and his just generally limited diet in general. That's completely leaving out all the puking and constant gagging when he gets upset.

If the food allergy was something that could kill my child, then yes, I would vote for food allergy. But if it was just something that made my kid feel ill until we cut the food out, then I'd pick GERD.

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  • My expertise is in helping people be who they want to be, with a specialty in how being a parent fits into everything else. I like people. I like parents. I think you're doing a fantastic job. The nitty-gritty of what you do with your kids is up to you, although I'm happy to post questions here to get data points of how you could try approaching different stages, because, let's face it, this shit is hard. As for me, I have two kids who sleep through the night and can tie their own shoes. I've been a married SAHM, a married freelance WAHM, a divorcing WOHM, a divorced WOHM, and now a WAHM again. I'm not buying the Mommy Wars and I'll come sit next to you no matter how you're feeding your kid. When in doubt, follow the money trail. And don't believe the hype.
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