FInally. If you follow the co-parenting blog, you know my ex-husband and I were negotiating something tough. We signed an agreement today, so now I can finally talk about it: We're moving to Ann Arbor, Michigan, at the end of the month!
I'm keeping my job at the best educational video game company in the world and working remotely from my new home (No. More. Subway. Crazies.), and doing the Weekend Part-Time MBA program at the University of Michigan. We're 45 minutes north of my parents, so they'll be able to see the kids all the time, and we'll finally have the support system we've really really needed this whole time. I won't have to miss work trips anymore because we can't cover childcare. And my kids will get to know their grandparents.
I can afford a house, for less than I pay in rent here. And I won't have to walk up to the 4th floor, and I'll have a yard, and a dishwasher, and laundry machines in the same place I live.
The MBA program actualy started in May, so every other weekend I've been flying there for class on Friday and Saturday, and then flying back. And doing my job and the commute and everything else, and also my homework. The academics: Not easy. The people in my program: Fascinating. Scheduling it all: Making me nuts.
So you can see why there were days when I needed to post something here, but instead was just staring at the screen, half-drooling. When your emotional refuge is running TINV functions in Excel for Statistics class, something's got to give. And it finally did.
Now I just have to finish my homework, go to class, find a place to live for me and one for my ex-husband, sign the kids up for camp, pack all my stuff, drive it out to Michigan, and take final exams for this semester. Piece of cake, right?
What's up with you?
oh wow, that's great! I live a little north, in the middle of the mitten, and after some adjustment (hey we moved here from VA) I like it. Michigan is so pretty and has lots to offer. A2 is such a neat town. Congrats!
Posted by: salty. | July 06, 2011 at 04:47 PM
What delightful news. I lived in New York for two years, and now have a magnet on my fridge that says "I love New York...from a comfortable distance."
Posted by: SanFranSarah | July 06, 2011 at 04:52 PM
That is fantastic! I'm so happy for you! I hope that the move goes smoothly and you find a great house.
Posted by: caramama | July 06, 2011 at 05:15 PM
Moxie, How amazing for all of you!! In Chicago and a midwestern girl at heart, I know you and your family will love it here.... Love it when good things happen to good people, I see lots of positive happenings for you all very soon. Congrats!!
Something worth mentioning:) Sleep issues brought me here and my little guy who still woke up twice a night at 2.75;s is now sleeping through the night all on his own, its been a week and I've stopped holding my breathe. I'm not cracking open the champagne but I feel like we've turned a corner. I can't tell you how much time I've spent searching archives looking for clues, gleaning wisdom and getting support I would never have in "real life" Its been a long hard road but I'm glad to have this place to come to and be a part of. Thank you and I hope you can continue Askmoxie with a full time job and school!!!!
Posted by: creatingbalance | July 06, 2011 at 05:24 PM
Thrilled for you and your family! Raise those mason jars at Dominick's and celebrate: A2 truly rocks!
When my husband and I were looking for a place to land back in the USA after several years abroad, all I wanted was to find a place like Ann Arbor.
We landed in Bozeman, MT, because my hubby has an unfounded bias against the Midwest. I'm loving Bozeman, so I can't complain, but I do miss A2 -- it feels like the ideal place to raise a family.
Are you staying in Michigan after completing the MBA program?
Posted by: Anna | July 06, 2011 at 05:27 PM
Wow! What great news. I follow you from Ann Arbor and love living here. I have a close friend graduating shortly from that same program. Once you're settled you should post a meeting time and maybe you and other Ann Arborites could meet up at a local cafe.
Posted by: Shonda | July 06, 2011 at 06:08 PM
Congratulations! I moved to A2 ten years ago and love it! I live on the Northside where my kids will be able to walk to elementary and middle school plus we have a community pool! Would love to have you in the neighborhood!
Posted by: Sharon | July 06, 2011 at 06:39 PM
@Sharon, there are a bunch of SF Moxites - I'm one, you can find an email address at the page linked in my sig. Do you know what area you want to live in?
Posted by: Charisse | July 06, 2011 at 06:51 PM
I'm just so impressed with your divorce. I love both of your dedication to the kids' outcomes. It's so...un-divorcelike.
I hope that with your influence, the way people divorce can become a better experience for everyone involved.
Thank you, and bless you. And I *know* you will love Ann Arbor. It's lovely. The winters - not so much. But whatever. ;)
Posted by: mrs. camacho | July 06, 2011 at 07:12 PM
Wow, congratulations! So glad that it worked out so well for you ALL. Happy moving!
Posted by: ccr in MA | July 06, 2011 at 07:21 PM
Yipee!!! So happy for you & yours! I spent 2.5 years in A2, and absolutely loved it. Ditto the aforementioned cheers for Zingerman's and Dominick's.
Posted by: hush | July 06, 2011 at 07:29 PM
I am so happy for you. And I love how you and your ex are able to actually work stuff like this out. It's amazing. COngratulations!!!
Posted by: jill | July 06, 2011 at 08:13 PM
Congratulations! I am completely blown away by both of you moving away together. It is just so impressive. Best wishes for your move!
Posted by: Kristina | July 06, 2011 at 08:31 PM
It's nice to see such good things happen for you. You've been such a positive influence for so many of us, and you deserve all the best. Congratulations!
Posted by: Shoshana | July 06, 2011 at 08:52 PM
Congrats! We have been in AA for the last 5 years (moved 4weeks after our first was born). I found Ask Moxie shortly there after! So happy to have you in town, we love it here, it has been great for us and our boys. And that comes from 2 OSU grads now both working for UM.
Looking forward to meeting you face to face!
Posted by: Liz | July 06, 2011 at 09:27 PM
Wishing your family ALL the best with this change. My experience with people from U of M is that networking is everything, so I'm hopeful that this could mean some assistance finding a job that LOD would like, the school district that would serve your family best, and the right accomodations for you all. Best wishes for the move, too.
Posted by: Celeste | July 06, 2011 at 09:40 PM
Welcome to A2! My kids attended a wonderful day camp. (Now, at 12 and 14 figuring out summer activities is far more complicated--day camp years were awesome!) Your kids are the perfect age for it. If you'd like more information shoot me a message. I've lived here for 20+ years and still haven't found anything I don't like about A2 :).
Posted by: lisak | July 06, 2011 at 09:43 PM
Congrats! You rock!
I've been hearing the Michigan ads on the radio with the piano music and "Pure Michigan" in the background. Seriously has brought me to tears because I love the midwest so much. In other news, I'm a sap.
Posted by: Fedupwithlunch | July 06, 2011 at 10:05 PM
Congratulations Moxie & LOD & boys! And Grandparents win too! Good for you on all fronts - work, school, blog, kids, you - congratulations. I am grinning from ear to ear for you. Big relief is in sight once you get settled. Yippee!
Posted by: G's Mum | July 06, 2011 at 10:32 PM
I'm so relieved and happy for you!
Posted by: Liberrian | July 06, 2011 at 10:37 PM
Congrats to Moxie!!
@J - Who's that best-therapist-in-the-world, cause we need one over here and we're in Ann Arbor! Send the name to Moxie and she can send it to me, if by chance you see this.
Posted by: Johanna | July 06, 2011 at 10:40 PM
Amazing! Congrats and keep us posted on how you're settling in!
Posted by: Minty | July 06, 2011 at 10:46 PM
The Midwest rocks. Congratulations!
Posted by: Badger | July 06, 2011 at 10:49 PM
Thank you so much, everyone!
@FedUpWithLunch, the Pure Michigan ads bring me to tears, as does the "Imported from Detroit" series with Eminem.
Posted by: Moxie | July 06, 2011 at 10:53 PM
Woot! Yay! So happy for you Moxie. I was hoping this was going to be your news (moving) when the negotiations were over as it seemed that it was the one thing you really wanted (as far as someone who doesn't know you IRL can tell).
It's all good and the rest of the stuff will work itself out.
Posted by: the milliner | July 06, 2011 at 11:12 PM
Congratulations Moxie -- that's all wonderful news!
Here, I'm phinishing a dissertation and just trying to hold things together until the deadline is met. I'm eating too much candy, drinking too much liquor and coffee (not at the same time), and staying up too late. I'm looking forward to decompressing and spending more time with my son when I'm through.
Posted by: Schwa de Vivre | July 07, 2011 at 12:10 AM
Congrats, Moxie! As we're still living in graduate student housing, that bit about the dishwasher and laundry machines made me a bit misty…*sigh*, someday I'll live in a house with a washing machine, too!
Hugs!
Posted by: BlueBirdMama | July 07, 2011 at 01:20 AM
Wow! It sounds like a great move for your family.
@Schwa da Vivre: finishing your dissertation is a wonderful feeling. Keep yourself going, it's totally worth it!
Posted by: scharkey | July 07, 2011 at 04:53 AM
Hurray! (The strength in you that got you to this point is AWESOME!)
Posted by: Sherry | July 07, 2011 at 08:46 AM
Hurrah! So happy for you, Moxie, and SO sympathetic about the commute (maybe we should do a round about commuting & parenting in which commuting is defined as not living in the same state/general area as your kids for part of the time - more and more people do this, divorced and married??). And SO full of admiration of you and LOD for being able to pull this off.
Yay to ending the subway crazies and being able to buy a house! We just moved into a house with a washer & dryer - and they are upstairs! It rocks.
Posted by: Erin | July 07, 2011 at 09:00 AM
Congrats Moxie! I suspected a move was in the works - but am floored that LOD is coming too. I think that is amazing. Truly, truly amazing and wonderful for your kids.
Perhaps a moving with children post would be in order? We're moving in 10 days and I am stressed right out. The house is a disaster of boxes everywhere, and I am seriously concerned about poor DS who, in the past year, started a new school and became a big brother and now has to move to a new house in a new town and start another new school. And he doesn't handle transitions too well. Sigh...
Anyways, here is hoping movers on this board all have smooth sailing.
Posted by: Jac | July 07, 2011 at 09:19 AM
I'm amazed at how many Ann Arborites there are here.
A^2 is home in a way that no where else will ever be for us.
Posted by: Brooke | July 07, 2011 at 10:05 AM
Ypsilanti's less expensive than Ann Arbor and right next to A2. We paid about $150K for a 2000 square foot house with fenced yard, garage and central air. I paid more than that for a 1000 square foot cape cod in Ann Arbor with no air and no garage and no fenced yard--in fact, very little usable yard! Good luck and welcome to town!
Posted by: Terri | July 07, 2011 at 11:17 AM
Fabulous! The fact that you have continued to blog, at all, with the level of life-changing stress going on (good or bad, it is still stressful!), makes you an unbelievable super woman. Honestly! Grad school, motherhood, moving, negotiations, etc…whew. I am exhausted thinking about it. Congratulations! You have set in motion things which will make your life so much easier in the long run. Whoop!
Posted by: Heide | July 07, 2011 at 12:55 PM
OMG! Congratulations! I used to work for the full-time MBA program there and miss it so much. You are bold to take on an MBA, especially with a full-time job and kids and everything else, but you will do great. Enjoy Ann Arbor - I'm so jealous!!!
Posted by: Tansasser | July 07, 2011 at 05:10 PM
Mazal Tov!!
Posted by: Tzipporah | July 07, 2011 at 05:38 PM
Congrats Moxie & LOD, way to go!! and good luck with the move, hope the transition is smooth.
Good luck to flea & Sharon too w/their moves, and to Schwa da vivre on the dissertating.
we're still trying to figure out if we can/should move, waiting to find out if the school made Adequate Yearly Progress & if we'll get school choice to transfer. won't find out until July 21 about a month before school starts. waiting for more to be revealed. and after a bit of de-tox from vile kindergarten, I've got my fabulous fun boy back, who just turned SIX and I threw him a great Star Wars bday party.
Posted by: Lisa F. | July 07, 2011 at 05:40 PM
@Charisse sent you an email. Thanks Lisa F. Go MOXIE! We should chat in both of our abundant leisure time. LOL!
Posted by: Sharon @proactiveparenting | July 07, 2011 at 07:16 PM
Congrats! Best of luck with the move... it will all be worth it!
Posted by: Mary | July 07, 2011 at 08:19 PM
Yay, welcome to Michigan.
Posted by: TND | July 08, 2011 at 09:14 AM
Congratulations to all of you! Sounds wonderful!!
Posted by: libbyllama | July 08, 2011 at 09:57 AM
Congratulations! Negotiating anything with an Ex is difficult. Safe travel prayers for all!
Posted by: Danielle | July 08, 2011 at 10:11 AM
Yay! Congrats! I bet you will love MI and look forward to hearing about your move, new environs, school, and so forth.
Posted by: Alexicographer | July 08, 2011 at 12:03 PM
Chiming in here to say congratulations and best wishes for all the exciting new transitions!
Also chiming in to say YES! YES! please! to some posts about moving. We're looking at a move in Sept. for one academic year (my son just turned 3), and then another move next academic year (this time for good). In the interim, we'll have another baby born in October, a new school/bedroom/sleeping arrangement for the 3 yo (not to mention the *sibling*). It just seems like... so much. I'm sure it's pregnancy hormones, but I'm constantly weepy at all the upheaval I feel like we're bringing upon our little guy's head. I know "the kids are alright"... but still... any words of wisdom or commiseration, practical advice or just sympathetic sighs, from Moxites out there would be so very, very great.
Also - because I just love this site, and I love the way people here talk and think, and because I sometimes yearn for the co-present, IRL company of people like you... is there a way we can possibly connect with other Moxites in our respective areas, without hijacking the beauty of this site as it is? I mean, seriously, who knew so many of you were all together in A2?
Makes me wanna ask.... anyone near Princeton, NJ, next year? And Charisse/Sharon/etc... SF-area folks... we're moving to Palo Alto (hopefully Forever) after that. Can we somehow connect?!? I'm keldaj (at) [the ubiquitous one that starts with "g" and includes "mail"].....
Right. Didn't mean to write a novel here. Mostly wanted to say a huge congrats and a thousand heartfelt thanks to Moxie, who really has created a uniquely wonderful forum here. And good luck, everybody, with all that's on your plates!
Posted by: berivan | July 08, 2011 at 07:09 PM
Ann Arbor is a wonderful place to raise a family. There is always something going on. Have to give mention to 2 other wonderful restaurants in A^2, Pizza House and the Maize N Blue Deli. We live about 45 minutes east now. All of southeast Michigan is great place to live. Welcome to the Mitten!
Posted by: Lisa | July 08, 2011 at 11:43 PM
I had read your Blog and understand your Situation and I hope this Reveal is good for you. Such an nice thought.
Posted by: London escorts | July 09, 2011 at 03:01 AM
I've been reading your blog for quite some time, through three babies I think! You are such an inspiration--thanks! I've lived in Ann Arbor for 15 years, and it is such a great place to live and raise kids. Let me know if you have any questions about town, activities, schools, etc. Good luck with your move!
Posted by: Amy McKenna | July 09, 2011 at 02:06 PM
Congratulations!!
And good luck getting through the next couple of months - although it really sounds like it will be worth it.
Posted by: Mytiroo.wordpress.com | July 10, 2011 at 07:10 AM
Wow, well done, Moxie! I'm impressed with your ability to negotiate with your ex, and move things along for yourself and your family.
Posted by: Maeve | July 10, 2011 at 03:04 PM
Such great news :)
Did the same, but in a different way; we sold our house and bought apartments in the city, in walking distance from each other (as in five minutes). He then got a lovely girlfriend, who has kids our son´s age, and they´ve now moved in. And we have dinners together once a week and we go on holidays together. She´s a lot like me, except she´s more like him than I am. If you see.
Seems you´re both really doing this to the benefit of all. Glad to hear your family is around, too.
Posted by: Maja | July 10, 2011 at 05:31 PM