Q&A: Getting apartment-dwelling kids enough exercise

Jesse writes:

"My husband and our two active kids (4,7) live in a small, yardless apartment in Vienna.  The kids share a reasonably sized bedroom.  Of course, we have daily trips outside, to parks, hiking, and plenty of activity.  We have a minimum of toys, including legos, duplos, toy cars, action figures, blocks, some board games, plenty of art supplies and we really try to keep the TV off, except for a 20 minute program each day.

But, I really think my kids are getting BORED and I need a break sometimes.  They fight with each other because they do not know what to play, and they are whining to us all of the time that there is nothing to do. I feel like we need some new stuff, ideas, playthings that can be enjoyed for more than just a few minutes. When I was their age, we went outside to build forts in the woods or play kick the can, but that is not an option living in the city.  I love much of the greatness that we have being citydwellers in a cozy apartment, but I find myself dreaming about a home with a yard (which is not even an option for us).  Sometimes, I would just love to have a lazy Sunday morning at home, but where the kids have something to do."

Oh, girl. I feel your pain. The two boys (and two cats) and I are in an 850-square foot 2-bedroom fourth-floor walk-up. We do have a park really close to us, but to get outside we still have to get fully dressed and walk down three flights and the few blocks to the park. This evening my older one was talking about wishing we lived in a house with a yard so he could go outside whenever he wanted to. It breaks my heart.

This is going to sound like a cop-out (because I'm clearly pro video game), but if you can afford it, get a Wii or an xbox360 with the new Kinect system. It will let your kids play really active games together (with each other or with you and your husband or all four of you) inside. Both of my kids are far better than I am at tennis, golf, bowling, baseball, and boxing, and they've worked off a ton of energy on the Wii. It's also an activity they can do together, even at these ages.

Other than that, maybe allow yourself the space to think about what it would mean to leave your apartment and go someplace you could have a yard. I know you say it's not an option, but let yourself fantasize about doing it. How radical a change would you have to make? If you let yourself go there emotionally, the confines of where you are won't feel so confining because it'll be a deliberate choice.

I also think this problem is going to get easier as your kids get older. They'll probably be playing organized sports anyway, and they'll be able to control themselves and do more quiet activities at home, so it won't be such a problem.

Does anyone else have any idea for managing kids who need large-muscle movement with living in a small, yardless apartment?

 

Comments

[Kate]

This is my life too.

I actually love the "winter" in the Middle East because we go to the park from school pickup (3:30 or 4) until it gets dark (5/5:30) many days. Summer, on the other hand--it is too hot to be outside until dinnertime or even later. They climb the walls. We all do.

If you can afford it, I'd recommend joining some sort of health club/sports facility that has programming/allows kids to use some of the facility. We did that--I use the gym approx 3x a week during school hours (I freelance PT from home). There is an outdoor pool that was open through the end of September; plus an indoor pool that can be used all year (ha! I almost said 4 seasons! I slay me).

Now, the kids are not allowed to use the treadmills and weights and all that, but they LOVE to go swimming. It's kind of a pain for the adults (going to the park is much easier), but it's definitely a Life Skill we want them to have and also? It wears them out like you would not believe. In a good way.

Financially it was a bit of a stretch to join this place, but I am not sorry. I definitely get my butt in gear to go knowing that it's not cheap, and once it gets rainy (please Gd) the pool will provide a nice 1-2x/wk alternative to the park.

Also potentially (probably?) impossible but you never know: a dog?

We had a dog visit us briefly a month ago (a complicated story: http://onetiredema.wordpress.com/2010/10/10/rainbows/), and the kids were falling all over themselves to walk her. It could have been just the novelty of it, but if it's a responsibility that you're willing to "help" with--I know Moxie's posted a q&a about pets before--that is always a way to get exercise.

[flea]

For large-motor indoor activities, don't forget the ever-popular "Dance Party." It is especially fun is Mon dances too, especially if she is goofy. Our Dance Party soundtrack is They Might Be Giants' biggest hits, but yours could be Elvis - whatever works for you.

As a parent of 4 and 7 year olds, I too long for a lazy Sunday morning at home (where the TV is not what is allowing me to be lazy). I do have a big lovely yard, and excellent neighbors with age-appropriate kids, but the kids mostly don't want to be kicked outside without a grownup (and now that it's "winter" in Georgia they claim it is too cold to play outside, at like 50 degrees fahrenheit). Imagine how nice it would be if a yard stopped kids from bickering and kept them occupied so I could read the newspaper?! But, no.

[VandyB]

I have a very active 4 year old boy. We live in a house with a yard, but when it is rainy or super hot, we need active indoor activities.

We have a mini-trampoline and a hippity hop - both are a lot of fun and help expend physical energy when we can't be outside. We have come up with a lot of fun games to play with those 2 items and both are often incorporated into imaginary play - I'm sure your boys would think up some fun games to play together with them. We have used them almost every day for a year and see no signs of boredom with either item.

When we're inside, we also run races (~8 seconds each), race up the stairs, and exercise together (we have 1 pound weights for my son, and do jumping jacks, etc.).

The Preschooler's Busy Book by Trish Kuffner was very helpful when I was feeling out of ideas - it has ideas for fun indoor games that I had never heard of and other I had forgotten about (red light green light, simon says) and other activities (crafts, etc.).

[lisa]

We, too, have dance parties, dance-in-the dark, pajama dance party, freeze dance. We also put up a chinning bar across a closet door, and boy does she have burly shoulders. SHe loves it and is proud of her singular monkey bar skills at pre-school. We also have a small trampoline (1 M x1 M) I think its lillian Vernon. It has a bar to hold onto and I put pipe insulation around the trampoline frame, and hold-on bar. We used this to teach alphabet, (sing or say a letter with each jump), spelling her name, etc, and we also say, "go do 50 bounces!). At one point we had a step one 3 person teeter-totter in the living room. This resulted in some crazy pony tricks, but still, enjoyed beyond 5 minutes, as one child can rock in the middle, or learn to stand and rock, and rope a calf....

No coffee tables, a free flow around the furniture, and one wide open space of about 5ft x 6ft.

We now rent an apt in an ever so unhip urban sprawl neighborhood, solely because she can walk out the door and be on grass with some mature tree shade.

[hush]

I wonder if you could find a country-dwelling family looking for a taste of city life who would be willing to home swap with you on the occasional weekend.

I envy you your lack of yard work! :)

[the milliner]

We're in a 2 bedroom + mezzanine 4-floor walk up too, close by a park. And like @Moxie, even though the park is close, it still involves getting dressed and ready to get out the door, down 3 flights of stairs, lugging tricycle / sled / bike carrier / whatever with a 2.5 year old. So yeah, not always so convenient. I'll be watching the comments closely for ideas for the future.

Reading the OP's post again, it sounds like there is more a problem with boredom than lack of activity. Though I do like the Wii suggestion - kill two birds with one stone - combat boredom AND work off some energy!! We'll invest in one eventually when DS is a bit older.

We dream of a yard as well, for the reasons the OP states. But for now, we are not willing to make the sacrifice to move to the suburbs. And we do have a somewhat large-ish upper deck which we can treat like a yard to play ball in etc. I mean, it's not the size of a yard, but at least we can do some outdoor activity without leaving home. I'm hoping we'll be able to build snowmen out there this winter (yay! less shoveling! wear the kiddo out. two birds. stone. etc.).

So yeah, back to suggestions. I'm wondering if getting the kids involved in making a plan for some self directed projects could help? There would probably need to be a fair amount of parent directing at the start (esp. for the 4 year old) to give them ideas of how to proceed. But hopefully with some time investment up front, they could start to learn to do this for themselves.

So, something like kicking it off with a trip to the library for a book on a subject that interests them. And then doing activities on that subject. i.e. An interest in planes = A book on planes + some instructions printed from the internet on how to make paper planes + paper plane making & decorating (i.e. colouring, painting) activity + flying the planes inside / having a contest who can throw their plane the farthest, etc.

Anyhow, the idea of self directed projects that are scaffolded by parents is not my idea. It's all described much better here on the High Scope education site: www.highscope.org/

I zoomed around and couldn't find the exact description of the self directed projects concept, but there are some interesting ideas on the site of what you can apply at home.

And a few other random ideas:
-Taping down a hopscotch on wood floors

-Making a home bowling kit with plastic or tin bottles and any ball you have around. I did this for DS and he loves it. Not so sure how our downstairs neighbour feels about it, but no complaints so far.

-Treasure hunt for numbers or letters etc. Could be fun to do it with a kids' digital camera so they could just photograph the stuff instead of picking it up (less work for cleanup later). They could print out the pictures and make their own book about a letter or a number etc.

On the crafts front, I've bookmarked a lot of ideas from here: http://www.thecraftycrow.net/ and here http://madebyjoel.blogspot.com/.

I find they both have a range of activities for different ages and activities that vary in the amount of parental involvement.

I read recently (on the free range kids site, maybe?) that it's OK for kids to be bored...it's how kids learn to initiate activities themselves, develop their imagination etc. Of course, the flip side is also having your kids be able to spend sometime doing an activity by themselves to buy you some free time / relaxation time too (which doesn't happen so much if they're complaining about being bored, but not doing anything about it).

I can distinctly remember complaining about being bored to my Mother a lot. I think she just gave us a few ideas, but continued on doing whatever she was doing. We did have times where she helped us get started or do an activity that was too complex to do on our own. But we definitely had times where we had to work it out for ourselves.

Whooops...didn't plan on writing a novel.

[VandyB]

Also, basketball (with soft ball and small hoop), baseball (with soft bat and ball, played in a room with nothing breakable), catch, and bowling are all fun physical activities to do inside.

[meggiemoo]

We live in a small townhouse (2 BR) with just a very small patio in front. We do live within walking distance of a large field/playground, but during the week we get home after dark. Am dreading the winter months as usual with 2 VERY active kids (2 and 5) who both need a ton of physical activity to sleep in any normal kind of way.

At least once a week, I pull all of the cushions off of the couches, pile pillows and blankets on the floor of the family room and we go crazy dancing, climbing over stuff, etc. Play tunnels are good, and fold up to a small size (crawling is tiring). I bought a very large beanbag for them to climb on and jump onto (granted, it takes up a lot of space, but it's worth it to me).

My son has SPD and needs a lot of large muscle stimulation everyday. We walk to and from his preschool unless it's absolutely freezing outside (a 2-minute walk), we go to an indoor pool, we frequent an indoor gymnastics place that has open gym, etc. The indoor places all cost $$, though.

I also fantasize often about a yard, and I already live in the suburbs! Not to say they wouldn't get bored in a yard, too, but it would be a nice change of pace. I often tell my son I'll time him and have him sprint outside or up and down the stairs.

For us, the darkness of the cold months is far more of an issue than the weather. And there I go dreading it again!

For my kids, when we're on vacation at the beach, I see how they are when they've gotten what I consider to be a proper amount of physical exercise. My son's preschool sends them outside 2x a day, I think, but it's still not enough.

Besides thinking of what to make for dinner every night, getting my kids enough activity is my number one bugaboo...

[Alice in Wonderland]

I have a 3-year-old in an apartment with no yard. What works with a 3-year-old might not with a 4- and 7-year-old, but for what it's worth: sometimes we spend half an hour bouncing and tumbling around on the bed! And sometimes we "race" up and down the main axis of the apartment.

Thinking back to what I used to do when I was the 7-year-old kid with a 4-year-old brother (and we had a yard, but there were rainy days and cold days): what about encouraging some more elaborate "let's pretend" games? Give them a scenario and roles and let them act out a story together. Depending on your kids' interests, there's the always popular "playing house" (one kid gets to be mommy/daddy and the other kid gets to be baby, for instance), or playing vet with their stuffed animals, or playing firefighters (with imaginary fire!!!) or playing explorers (your apartment is a newly-discovered underground cave!) or ... whatever you think your kids would find cool!

[Wilhelmina]

DH, DD and I share less than 600 sq ft in our apartment and we've also got rules to contend with. Complaints about babies crying and unavoidable things like that are never followed up, but if I got my daughter anything trampoline like that would not go down well. It's a no pets, no laundry on show world. The apartments are only a decade old but very noisy as in noise carries easily. loud play complaints are followed up on the spot. Like laundry infractions.

We're within minutes from Canary Wharf office and mall complex and although it's not meant as a play area it's full of babies and toddlers. It's all heated and has long connecting corridors with lifts ( elevators) and automatically opening doors. At quiet times you can use a mini-scooter for instance.

Our climate is mild compared to North America, but during gales and pouring rain like today or quite a cold winter last year the fact that we can go and walk and skip and see people does DD and myself good.

She's not three yet of course and one girl and she loves cafe culture and people. So we always go out twice a day and one of those times is there.

If she's really stroppy we walk to the mall and she can have a lemonade at one of the froffee coffee shoppes. Works a treat on both of us in such cases. We do need to go out a lot but on the plus side we can. In the country you see no small child after four or five in the afternoon whereas here DD doesn't stand out. Urban baby.

Daddy comes home on the DLR ( like the Disney train apparently) and we can meet him on the platform. The station is in the same mall and office complex. DD loves that.

I also joined a name brand gym/music/art class thing so we can use the free open gym every day bar Sunday.

In good weather there are lots of parks and an urban farm and there are what are called soft play centres of climbing frames and lots of balls for very small fees.

And yes, she watches lots of Cbeebies from the BBC. When I say so she doesn't sit and watch so much but she does join in with the yoga programme and the jumping and dancing ones. Without shoes and no shouting is fine.She will not watch any show that's not BBC. Bizarre but true.

She does need two long walks a day and preferable one being a really good climbing run in a park or gym nut indoors she is content the other times.

In fact DD has had the run of a garden for weeks on end this summer while I sort through stuff left by aged relation and the novelty wore off very quickly. She much prefers a garden with other children in called a park.

I grew up in a house with garden but wasn't allowed in it to play except under close supervision. I played in the streets and the park but that wouldn't work today.

So DD is not allowed to play in the manicured grounds much so nothing is really different from when I was a child in that sense.

Vienna has a great paediatrician practice but the city is more geared to the older visitor. Austria is very much respect and conservatism and respect for conservatism.
Lovely, not a criticism.

I stayed there for several weeks when I was a child and I was amused by the musea and the Prater and the petting farm. I grew up in an equally conservative country so expected not much more.

So I wouldn't have thought that you could make a lot of noise indoors. I hope I'm wrong. Best to tread carefully for public peace.

There are quite costly indoor fun places but prices are more reasonable at places like Dusika which have lots of indoor sports and astroturf football and gym and fitness things.

I've not got shares in them but one of the mums at the London gym used to go there at home in Vienna. I've heard much about it as nothing here is apparently as good. Nor is any medical practice as nice, or anywhere as clean. Perfectly true no doubt.....

[paola]

Some great ideas, which I will have to nick.

Re the fighting: I'm having the same problem with my almost 4 and almost 6 year olds. They go to kinder full time and get home at around 4, but the moment they get inside they 'play fight' until someone ends up in tears. It used to bug me no end and I would try everythign to seperate them, but after a chat to my cousin who told me her two boys (8,10) do the same thing, I realised that it is probably a 'contact' thing, meaning that they need that contact time after a day apart to get reconnected ( hubby is the same with me after some time apart). Now I let them play-fight, as long at it's on the rug so they don't bang their heads, and then after half an hour or so they are usually ready to play 'properly'.

Apart from that I can't really contribute seeing we do have a yard and make use of it all year round.

[crescentgirl]

We live in Connecticut and it's cold for months on end. Going out is possible but outdoor playtimes are brief. Therefore ...

We have an indoor tent from Target, in the shape of a giraffe. It takes up a huge amount of room, but with bounce0house balls, it is hours of fun. They crawl in and out of it, throw balls as hard as they can inside the tent (up into the neck, as horrifying as that sounds) which corrals the mess and burns energy ...

Other than that I second the Wii option. We don't have one but folks we know do and it's a Godsend for them.

[the milliner]

One more thing to add is yoga for kids (and I think they have yoga on the Wii?).

DS was burning off some energy last weekend in our bedroom (it's on the mezzanine and has a step leading out to our top deck. DS loves to jump off the step while I sit on the edge of the platform bed protecting the corner so he doesn't crack his noggin open). I was looking for something to keep him occupied for about 20 mins until lunch time and I started doing some sun salutations. He joined in and he LOVED it! Of course he thought it was the funniest thing ever.

But he's asked to do it again a few times 'Goga! Goga!' and when I picked him up from daycare yesterday, he and a few other kids were doing what looked like downward dog poses. He came running to me and said 'Goga!', so I'm not sure if he was giving his own impromptu class or what. I'm hoping I can get him hooked on it as I would love to start doing sun salutations in the am and we have the time considering DS gets up so early.

Anyhow, could be a thought as I'm sure there are scores of yoga videos out there and probably some geared towards kids.

@Wilhelmina,
(Sorry to all in advance for the OT rant, BUT...) Doesn't that no laundry on view thing drive you nuts? We have the same rule and I just don't get it. Use your dryer! Pay more money! We don't want you to use the option that's better for the environment! In our case, our balconies are out back, so it's not like it's ruining the look of the front or anything. I personally love the look of multiple laundry lines strung out in back alleys. Not to mention the smell of laundry dried outside (even in the city) and the useful effects of sun bleaching on whites.

[Jan]

First of all, know that having a yard will NOT prevent your kids from whining about being bored and/or wanting you to take them somewhere. We have a lovely fenced-in back yard with a delightful play structure, swings, a little basketball hoop and a t-ball set, yet every free moment that the weather is decent my kids are bugging me to go out FRONT and ride BIKES in the culdesac. So there's that.

But inside activities: We have an old crib mattress (stored under a twin bed) that the kids jump on. We do Simon Says style games with running and forward rolls and such. I'd totally go for a mini-trampoline, too. I sometimes set up an obstacle course with chairs and stools and a 2x4 for a balance beam and sofa cushions (and the crib mattress). They can time each other, or I can time them or sometimes they just like to go through it at their own pace/together and if Mommy stays out of it and doesn't make them do it MY way, they have a lot of fun.

[Wilhelmina]

@ the milliner,

Yes and no. Mostly yes of course, the laundry thing. Most of all as we're on the first floor, or US second? as in nobody lives on the lowest floor. So if I discreetly put up a drying rack to catch a breeze and sun outside, well back from the windows,it's immediately seen whereas on the upper floors I can see laundry but not the manager/concierges.

On the no part we have only a " Juliette" balcony which means that we have two French Doors, as in glass doors that open and a metal rack with wooden top bar outside. The flats in other buildings all have very small, front facing balconies.The backs of our buildings are all plain brick.

Personally I can't see what's wrong with a drying rack but can see a line of smalls ( underwear) festooning them would not maintain the illusion of deluxe urban living.We're homeowners so need the illusion. The apartments thus decorated across the road are housing projects.

If we had back balconies I'd say bring on the lines of smalls. Yes, I am a hypocrite.

The policing is nuts. When DD was a four months old I was ironing DH's shirts when she needed an urgent change of nappy. So I hung the finished shirt on the curtain rail in front of the window section.

I hadn't time to put her cream on her bottom before there was the imperious knock on the door. Ugh.

A friend in another building had built a play tent indoors for a play-date using quilts etc. Summer, so she'd hung one quilt over the balcony rail. In her case they rang up and she said she'd take the quilt down in twenty minutes or so as the play session would be over then.

Three minutes later hammering on the door. To get from the office to her place is a lot further than mine next door to it; the guy must have sprinted like a cheetah.

To give the manager his due we have no rubbish left on site, no bikes and prams all over and no rats. I know of plenty other similar estates that have all three.

I do use the dryer a lot ( easier on the eczema) and also have found a hanging washing spider thing that I can suspend on the spring of the apartment front door. There's such a draft there that clothes dry beautifully.

But there's no outdoor smell of fresh, clean, laundry, particularly whites.

But we do have a very comely young lady, of beautiful shape, who does her ironing in her apartment, of an evening, whilst it's lit like a light-house and she completely nude.

What the poor exhibitionist does not realise is that only my very confirmed bachelor type gay neighbour and myself and a two year old girl are able to behold this vision so it is completely lost on us.

Although the concierges do make regular rounds of course and the manager goes home at 6......

Sorry everyone for this unbecoming rant on laundry in the urban spaces.

What does reduce me to fury is when I spend ages picking tape off cardboard and rinsing bottles and crushing cans to go in the recycling and the concierge is then ordered to tip it in the dumpster as the recycling bins are nearly full.....ggggggggggggggrrrrrrr.

[Erin]

Well, this won't get you off the hook necessarily, but do you do any cooking projects? My DS LOVES to help me in the kitchen (sometimes he actually helps, and sometimes he pretend helps by "making pancakes" on the floor while I cook). Kids can actually slice and peel and stir - lots of things. And dough is great fun to play with, plus there is the pride of eating something they've made.

And I second the "boredom is okay" theme. I mean the whining about being bored can be hard on parents, but kids everywhere are bored, and it's true that boredom sparks creativity. Every kid is bored sometimes - even with a huge house and yard and a bazillion toys. I'm sure it depends on the personality of the kid, but I've noticed for my son, he only gets bored at home, and when he's out in the world he's happy, just looking and walking and exploring. So sometimes even though I'm really tired, I just have to get myself outside and doing something with him, no matter what it is. (He even will enjoy a trip to the supermarket, anything as long as it is different and outside the house.)

[lisa]

LOVE the bowling, hopscotch and treasure hunt ideas!!!! Thank you!!!

Breaking all the rules, I just bought a retractable line for our rental with patio. They just cannot argue against what is obviously the best way to dry laundry and prevail. They will have to evict me.

[Jamie]

I have five kids in an 1800-sq foot house. We have a little yard, but in the winter we need strategies for vanquishing the wigglies inside.

My husband bought a chin-up bar that installs in a doorway. (He also bought a punching bag that can hang in our basement. Don't know if that takes too much space for an apartment dweller, but my boys (and the whole neighborhood, really, including some of the adult men) thought it was great.) Sometimes I send wiggly boys to do calisthenics on their own: how many crunches can you do? how many push-ups? can you do one more crunch in the next set? how about one more push-up? I also find that planned exercise seems to help them regulate themselves at home, so if I am disciplined about getting us to the pool regularly in the winter, I have fewer episodes of "let's set up a giant slalom course on the stairs and see if Mom notices!"

I just re-read your question and it's more general than I thought at first -- not just about the wigglies. My kids love to build forts out of couch cushions, blankets, clothespins, and chairs. They'll hang out in there with a book or a notebook for a long time. They spend hours with Legos (getting them a big sturdy base piece was key when they were getting the hang of it, and having a supply of mini-figures seemed to transform the game from just snapping blocks together into creating an elaborate civilization). My whole world changed when my oldest got into reading for entertainment, and keeping a fresh supply of appealing and age-appropriate library books around is key to my sanity. :-)

I hate doing the work of rotating toys but it does keep things fresh. If you have a cubby where you can stash some of the less-used toys for a few weeks, they'll be much more appreciated when they come back out. Good luck!

[Kate]

@ Erin, for me, cooking with one or the other (esp my 4 yo, who is better with listening to instrux) is ok (good, even), but trying to divide tasks between the 4 yo and the 6 yo is a disaster. Perhaps if we had a bigger kitchen and more counter space it would be reasonable, but it's only a matter of time until one of them gets knocked off the stepstool and slams into the tile floor.

[lolismum]

I have two kids exactly the same age as the OP, and I do have a yard, but like someone above posted, they still want adult involvement, or want to ride their bike up and down our street. So a yard is not a guarantee that they will not get bored. Given your kids' ages, a lazy morning is quite hard to achieve unless it involves computer games and/or TV. One option is to find a cafe/restaurant with a nice garden that the kids can play in and take them there. You sip on your coffee and they can play outside, in your line of vision. I have not been to Vienna in a long time, but I do know these places exist in Germany, in large cities and in the UK. That's what we do when we travel.

In the winter we spend a lot of time in museums. Children's, science and natural history museums have tactile stuff for kids to do, as well as some games/climbing/art etc. I also take them to the community center's indoor (heated in the winter) pool. So, given your kids' ages, lazy Sundays are near impossible, maybe you get 1/2 hr here or there. But ther

[lolismum]

Ignore the second paragraph above. I meant to erase it.

[BlueBirdMama]

@Wilhelmina: "But we do have a very comely young lady, of beautiful shape, who does her ironing in her apartment, of an evening, whilst it's lit like a light-house and she completely nude."

That beautifully written sentence just made my day.

I have one 3.5 y.o son and a girl due in 8 weeks; we live in a family oriented apartment complex that has grassy courtyards between units and 3 playgrounds within a 5 minute walk; but we feel DS is still too young to go out back and play by himself as the courtyards are not fenced in. Here are my random thoughts about physical activity/boredom:

I second classes (we've done gym and swimming, both of which wear out a kid nicely). It's also nice if you can find a gym with baby sitting (that way you can work out or just sit in the steam room or have a coffee in the lobby while the boys are supervised).

I second cooking projects (but of course, Mom has to supervise, so no break there).

Indoor fort building and fantasy play is awesome. We also do roughhousing on the bed w/ mom or dad, and 20 minutes of that seems to make DS ready for some quieter, self-directed play. On the one hand, playing with DS in a really focused, committed way for a good chunk of time sometimes "fills his cup" so to speak, and he can then occupy himself in his room for 30-45 minutes. Other times, it seems to just spark a bottomless desire for our attention and he's totally unwilling to transition to downtime or more solitary activity.

I also second boredom as a great teacher. Though I (and especially my husband) play with my son a lot, I don't believe it's a Mom's responsibility to keep the kids constantly entertained.

Then again, I know nothing about how to get siblings to play together. My son is about to get a sister and while they won't be playing together for a while, I wonder what I can do to constructively facilitate play and foster their own conflict resolutions skills.

[Charisse]

Yeah, this is tough. We have a nice large (1700 sq ft) flat but it's inbetween two others - if you know SF you'll know the style. So even though we have a giant 40-ft hallway down the center, running up and down it can be awfully hard on the neighbors.

Somersaults and yoga are great, walks around the block are good...can't wait until she can do that by herself, but 6 is a little soon!

[Tina]

I don't know if Vienna has anything similar, but most McDonald's here have play parks for kids to run around in and socialize. They may be riddled with snot, poop and germs, but it does let kids get their energy out--and gives Mom a break to sit with a coffee and maybe even a book.

There are also a few Mommy-centred cafés around that have toys, crayons, chalkboards, and such for kids. Even if there aren't any energy-burning activities, there'll probably be other kids there.

If all else fails, you can start a little Mommy group of your own and meet at people's houses, or parks, or even restaurants where you can reserve a private room. Nothing wears kids out like running around with other kids!

[the milliner]

@Jamie and others who've mentioned the chin up bar - another upgrade (in difficulty) from that is a training board for rock climbing.

It's basically a board made of wood or textured plastic that screws to the wall (I don't think there are versions that attach to the door frame). Kids can do pull ups with both hands in big pockets, but they can also practice doing pull ups with a few fingers on each hand in smaller pockets etc. once they get stronger.

There's also this:
http://tinyurl.com/25sn4ey

We're dying to get this for our son (ok and maybe for us to play around on a bit). Looks way cool and HOURS of fun. The extra crib mattress works great as a crash pad.

[JCF]

Yep, this is us too. 2 parents, 3 kids 3 and under in a 900 sq ft apartment with no yard. No room to store big toys or sports equipment.

My initial thought is that if the original poster is getting outdoors daily for things like hikes, things aren't too shabby. I will admit to having days when crossing our doorstep doesn't happen. I know there are lots of kid-friendly things to do in our city, but many days getting clothes and shoes on me and 3 kids, plus diaper bag, snacks, etc. is overwhelming (especially when my 3 year old refuses to wear pants--more often than not). Other than that, we do a lot of same suggestions other people have had--jumping on the bed/couch, climbing around on cushions, etc.

OP was also asking about activities (toys) that can be enjoyed for more than just a few minutes. It sounds like your kids are getting old enough for more complex building sets, like Legos, Knex, Lincoln Logs, etc. My sister's kids are that age, and I know they spent DAYS building a Knex ferris wheel and roller coaster.

[Anna]

A great community resource during the winter in snowy Bozeman, Montana, is Gym Day every Thursday at a local middle school gym. The coordinator opens up a storage bin filled with a bunch of balls, hoops, tunnels, bikes, tricycles, etc. and kids age 1-5 just have a blast for 1 hour. Perhaps you could ask around and see if there's a venue nearby that would allow you to host such an event weekly. At first, parents would need to bring their own toys to share but I'm sure you'd get donations as kids grew out of their toys and the program gained momentum.

[Sarah]

What about your local community center? I was a big whiner as a child and kept complaining to my mother about how bored I was. Her solution was to sign me up for swimming, dance, gymnastics, karate and even break dancing lessons!

It would be keep me occupied and active and I'd be out of her hair.

[SusanOR]

I love the ideas here.
I especially like the idea of taking some of the open-ended toys (Lego, etc) and making a longer-term project with it. Thus, instead of just playing with Lego, what about planning a city? It could be a project that unfolds over days or weeks, with each child adding his strength to the mix.

When things are really bad, I sometimes go to Ikea to "shop" while the kids get to play in the kids area. Yes, they have those in Vienna too! Of course, you could just go hang out in the restaurant & get a coffee for an hour while the kids play downstairs.

I know, not the same as being able to relax in your own home but I think that's more about their age than about whether you are in a city or not. At those ages, they want your involvement.

[uschka]

Sounds like you need a 'I'm bored' jar. Get a box or a jar and on pieces of paper write down things they can play together. You can use ideas like 'play this specific board game', 'make Daddy a card telling him one good thing about him' or 'build a space station (underwater world, dinosaur park, train station etc) out of lego' or you could have 'dance to CD 1 or 2 or 3' or 'do 20 sit ups' or you could even have 'wash all the windows' or 'sweep the kitchen floor'. Activities could be even more open ended. Do you have a dress up box? Your paper could say 'Adam is a pirate, Peter is a stow away! Quick Peter, run and hide before Adam makes you walk the plank'. 'Hide and Seek! Peter, hide the tennis ball while Adam counts to 20, then it's Adam's turn'.

The choice is, they can play the activity they select, or they can play another game that they choose, but they can't be bored!

[marci]

has anyone tried those balance boards? how much of what kind of benefit did anyone get?

love the 'bored jar' idea - thanks!

[Erin]

@ Susan - I live in a small Walmart town and on desperate occasions of cold or extended rainy weather, I have taken my son to Walmart to let him run around. My ped told me that sometimes there is a mommy group that meets in Walmart/ Best Buy type places, near the riding lawn mowers, so the kids can crawl all over the "trucks" and the mommies can hang out with each other!

[the milliner]

@JCF, Totally know what you mean about some days just not making it out of the house. And I only have 1 under 3. When you're having one of those days, go to this link and listen to song #10 'Pants'.

http://www.cbc.ca/radio2/cod/concerts/20100511waili

You'll have a good hearty belly laugh and a new little jingle to sing to your 3yo.

@uschka, Thanks for the reminder about the bored jar and for the ideas of what to put in it.

[Wilhelmina]

@ the milliner, thanks that is a really sweet song ! I must say the link provided crashed my Firefox browser absolutely, but I could see and hear it on Youtube just fine.

" Trousers" keep you warm doesn't sound as good but it does work. My daughter has had severe eczema since she was two weeks old so the poor thing has been coated in emollient and dressed in long sleeves and trousers forever.

There have been patches of spirited resistance of course at developmental points, but medical necessity is medical necessity. And she really is terribly tolerant about being dressed and man-handled compared to her peers.

And I am an awful mummy. We go out unless we're very ill. And yes, I have been known to carry a howling, writhing toddler forcibly attired in her jacket and shoes all the way down the stairs( walk up but only one and a half floors) and out of the apartment.

I seem to get new neighbours every six months, as most of the apartments are rented short-term and I've the sinking feeling I could probably yell all manner of cruel abuse at my little one without anyone calling for help for her. On the plus side tantrums needn't keep us in.

BUT! we're in a temperate climate and water-proof boots and over-trousers and jackets mean you can go out always weather wise.

And she cheers up as the fresh air hits.

And as a SAHM with a partner with long hours and frequently away too you don't see people at. all. If I was working out of the home and commuting I dare say I'd have seen quite enough people all week when the weekend rolled round.

[Molly]

This is a tough problem - we had the same issue living in 900 square feet with no yard, but my daughter goes to full-time daycare with HUGE play spaces so I figured she got her activity there. The tough thing is that while exercise in a small space is possible, a parent needs to coordinate it - like all the fun games mentioned above. In a large space, kids will just run around because that's what comes naturally. In a small space, they tend to mis-direct their energy or fight. Our solution (obviously, this doesn't work for everyone) was to move to a house. Now there's tons of room, my daughter gets the wiggles out on her own just running around, and I've lost about 10 pounds walking from room to room. True story.

[Mothering from the other side]

Really enjoyed this post. Thanks, Moxie. Spot on for us.

We are in Asian in a city of 10 million and are approaching our girls' first winter after moving from a temperate climate (also in Asia). So all this indoor time will be new to them.

This post reminds me to feel a bit better about the amount of activity that the girls are currently getting. Just to get Bigger (5) to kinder every morning on the city bus with Smaller (3) in tow is quite an outing. And then there is the pick up - with the fun option of 'bus or subway for the way home today, girls?' They ponder and discuss and then decide. Up the stairs, up the hill, up, up, up...

We are tv-free and always have been, so the art cabinet at their reach and the music cabinet at their reach help. They are just at the age that they enjoy playing together. These elaborate schemes and stories come about and that is fun to observe. They do love to help me cook and when there is a meltdown, I grab a stack of books and just start reading aloud. Within seconds they are at my side, quiet and all ears.

Loved all the suggestions and love Moxie.

[MemeGRL]

To all of you fantasizing about a yard:
We have one. The kids won't go in it. They play outside, but not in the yard. So the grass is greener, but only because it's untrod. They much prefer indoor hide and seek, or a walk somewhere.

Also, when my older is misbehaving, he almost always just needs a gross motor activity. So we do lots of runs around the block, or figure 8s, or jumping jacks or pushups or something.
Only other thing: Just read a "superlight indoor snowball" idea: white stockings with fiberfill. I haven't tried it but I just need the fiberfill.

[Cheap Air Jordan]

WHAT A NICE POST, REALLY IT'S GREAT JOB. KEEP IT ON....POST!VERY INFORMATIVE DUDE.

[chanel designer handbags]

Beautiful as usual. Now that i am retired MAYBE i will have more time to knit at least more of your lovely patterns!

[tieddaftNaike]

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