Still Haiti

Last-minute emergency business trip. Still thinking about Haiti. Worried about them. Concerned with the media coverage--it just feels very unbalanced and racist and icky to me. Really wondering will help the most after this initial wave of rescue and emergency supplies. Wondering why I'm so lucky.

Anyone want to talk about any of this? Or how you're talking about it with your kids?

Comments

[sster]

I am just so wanting to go down there to nurse the babies.

[paola]

I don't know about there in North America, but media coverage is far too gruesome to show my 3 and 5 year olds (particulalry my 5 year old who is super-sensitve about what he sees on tv). Is this just an Italian thing, I wonder? BTW, no warnings. They just shoot to scenes of the dead trapped under concrete.

As a result, I haven't talked about this particular earthquake with my kids. We did, however, talk about the recent earthquake in Abruzzo (media coverage was less scary for kids) and the then 4.5 year old showed empathy and sadness for those affected. They spent a lot of time talking about it at kinder, but I don't know if the Haiti quake has received any attention.

[mom2boys]

I wish I could be down there helping. Haven't discussed it with the kids. The two year old is scared of his shadow these days and wouldn't understand anyway. The news coverage - well the video footage anyway - is pretty graphic. Went from a hallway in a hospital to the back of a pick up truck carrying dead bodies. Lifted the blue tarp to reveal the bodies.
And Pat Robertson - really? He's not just some political pundit - he's supposed to be a religious leader. I doubled my donation to the relief effort after I heard what he said. And not to make this about religion or offend anyone but there is a time and a place and pointing fingers and laying blame while thousands of people are hurt, dead or missing family members is appalling.

[Mrs. CPA]

I'm having a really hard time with it myself. My kids are too young to understand, but I keep thinking about what would happen if my son was left without parents, or my daughter was in her crib and survived but we didn't. What would happen to them in a time of mass chaos? And it doesn't help when I see a picture of a Dad holding his dead child that could be my daughter's age or a four year old boy sitting on the curb crying. What about the people who will see this disaster as an opportunity to hurt children? I can't stop thinking about it.
I was on the verge of tears or crying for most of the day yesterday and I held my children so tightly when I got home.
I'm not watching the news about it because my heart will just break, and I can't do it.
I knew I shouldn't have looked at those pictures yesterday, but I did it anyway. If I had the means and didn't have to be here doing taxes, I would be down there holding children.

[Catherine]

I can't even listen to reports on NPR, never mind photos or video.

As for what will help Haiti the most after this wave of disaster relief, my impression is that a large part of the nation's poverty is due to debt to first world nations, which the Jubilee Act for Responsible Lending and Expanded Debt Cancellation (http://www.jubileeusa.org/jubilee-act.html) would cancel. So telling your Congresscritter that you think this bill is a good idea might be a start.

More background on how Haiti got into its debt situation in the first place (short summary: NOT THEIR FAULT) can be found in this article from May of last year in the Times Online: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article6281614.ece (Both of these links are via a BoingBoing post here: http://www.boingboing.net/2010/01/13/haitis-real-deal-wit.html)

[jingle]

cool mind,
beautiful heart.
cheers.

[Jen Barnes]

My husband and I are going to wait until the initial wave is nearing its end and things with our charity of choice calm down a little bit. We plan on sponsoring a child long-term to make a BIG difference in a LITTLE one's life for a LONG time. We are currently praying about going through the Hands and Feet Project.

[Mog]

@Mrs. CPA - This is exactly what UNICEF addresses during disasters: vulnerable children, women, and families. http://www.unicef.org/emerg/index_33296.html

[Lisa]

Is this ignorant?: If the airport is where the supplies are stuck, why are people not storming it? Are they? are they being kept out? I know the terminals are collapsed. people are walking to the Dominican Republic, why not to the airport? I am sooooooo Frustrated. Really? Could we not have gotten water in on Wednesday? I sent money, but its not even money that helps. I did read of 35 paratroopers. Have been on the NT times online and NPR, no tv with a 4 yo in the house. Primal Scream Here___________________

[FM]

I gave to the Red Cross.
I'm also just thinking about nursing babies... a saw a report about an 18 day old baby who lost it's mother.
I just want to adopt that baby.
Not sure how to help more...
It's all not helping the post pregnancy anxiety...

[kelly]

My child is too young to know what's going on, so I haven't discussed it with her. I can't look at the pictures without getting upset, so while she's with me I try not to think about it. That doesn't work, but I try.

[maria]

I gave to Doctors Without Borders and semi-bullied my daughter into donating $2 out of her (healthy) piggy bank. I felt a little badly about it, I was working out my own guilt but I also felt it was important for her to get in the habit of helping. I haven't given her details, just that there was an earthquake and the people there need help and lots of people are going to try to help and giving money, including us. And she knows a little about Katrina so we talked about how people from all over the world and all over the country helped the people in New Orleans then, and the Golden Rule, etc.

As for myself, I can't handle very much of it. I listen to NPR a little and have watched a little news on the internet, trying to keep it to the talking heads, not the graphic video. I am drawn to it but I know I can't handle the futility and desperation, especially knowing a little about America's role in their desperate state before the earthquake.

I highly recommend reading Tracy Kidder's Mountains Beyond Mountains for a little background on Haiti, specifically the medical services and infrastructure there.

[maria]

Just adding, if there were a way to adopt one of those babies I would do it in a heartbeat.

[monkeymama]

I am still very much thinking about it. I have been avoiding looking at pictures, so have been sticking with NPR.

I'm with @Lisa. It's so hard to listen to the journalists walking through the city without wanting to go... couldn't you strap some water bottles to you?? I know it's completely unrealistic, I know they'd be mobbed and only help 3 people, but it just makes you crazy. I heard an NPR correspondent break down while reporting last night (trying to describe a little girl covered in bandages laying in front of him on a stretcher), which made me feel for them, too. Gah!

[MrsHaley]

Can't look at pics, can't watch it on TV ... sticking with NPR and still have to turn it off. We donated what we could. It was not enough. If my life were different, I would go down there in a heartbeat to dig my hands bloody. As it is, I send my prayers and my money, then clutch desperately at my children and my good fortune.

Somebody, please airlift the orphans out of there and I will be right in line behind @FM & @Maria at the Miami airport, ready to adopt one. We are still nursing so I will happily take an infant. Sign me up.

[anna]

wondering if those of us who are nursing could somehow get milk to babies in Haiti? anyone have ideas? too logistically impossible right now?

[maria]

I was just reading on the USAID website about how inexperienced and untrained volunteers are not welcome – you have to have 10 years' disaster relief experience and several years foreign experience. I can understand, but it's frustrating. Same with the reporters and the water bottles. I know it would create a riot and be worse than nothing – but, how can anything be worse than nothing??

I also looked up Hurricane Katrina, and "only" 1800 people died in that. They're talking about 50,000 people dead in Haiti. It's incomprehensible.

Yes, @MrsHaley, airlift those orphaned babies! I'll relactate…

[maria]

@anna, you could contact the Human Milk Banking Association at http://www.hmbana.org/ and see whether that's feasible either now or at some point in the future.

[anna]

I did recieve a note from another lactating friend who says they are collecting breastmilk for Haiti, through the HMBANA, even if there isn't one in your city they pay to have it shipped to one of their locations. I sent them an email and put a call through; will let you all know what I find out.

[Lorien]

I can't watch TV at all. I can't believe how free our media has become in sticking a camera in the face of utter grief and devastation. There has got to be a way to tell the world what is happening without this (in my opinion) ultimate breach of privacy.

I can't help but wonder, if a natural disaster struck a white upper middle class nieghborhood, would the cameras click in their faces so freely?

[Geek in Rome]

I can't look at the images at all. I'm also afraid such graphic detail will numb people or break their spirit.

I listened to the Rachel Maddow show update and I was very impressed with her line up of guests. One thing I learned that I and others have wondered was why they can't just give out the aid that's there. And experienced workers said it has to be done in a controlled, patrolled, secure area or it will trigger violence or chaos. The logistics have to be set up right or it may cause more harm than good (trampling etc.. more dead)

The other was a guest who talked about Partners in Health and how the most effective aid organization you can give to is to one that seeks to build up and strengthen a nation's infrastructure and native people's skills.

Groups that kind of swoop in then clear out once the disaster has lost steam don't do much to build a nation and people to be able to help themselves in times of need.

I haven't told my kids anything since they were freaked out by the Abruzzo earthquake we felt here. I prefer they help people we see face to face, like some of the homeless in our neighborhood.

Since they're so little I get them to help or care for insects and animals we come across, too, because that's easy and hands-on and it teaches a lot about empathy and making an impact. Little things like saving a honey bee that had gotten wet and cold and needed to be warmed up before it could fly home. It was really neat showing them how to do it and to see their joy knowing they saved a life when she flew away.

[Blythe]

It's really hard to know what to say about it, other than that it's all heartbreaking.

In the interest of feeling useful, I thought this article was enlightening, and helped me see why cash donations can many times do more good than in-kind donations:
http://www.globalpost.com/dispatch/haiti/100113/haiti-earthquake-aid

[Cloud]

My toddler is too little to understand yet, so I'm not even trying to tell her.

I'm still in the hormonally fragile place I apparently land post-partum. I can hardly think about this or any other tragedy without starting to cry. So, in the interest of self-preservation, I'm not even reading the news.

We'll be giving money, probably to UNICEF and thinking good thoughts about the amazing people who dedicate their lives to responding to this sort of disaster. Also thinking about how being good at logistics is a much under-appreciated skill. All of the good will and help offered by the world in these situations depends on there being people on the ground who are good at making things happen.

[Meika]

For those of you talking about adoption, I received a message the other day from a second cousin who is on the board of an orphanage in Haiti called God's Littlest Angels (http://glahaiti.org/). They adopted two of their children from there. It sounds like the orphanage is concerned about/planning for an influx of children as a result of the earthquake. Anyway, there were certainly children in Haiti waiting for families even before the earthquake and are sure to be many more now.

[SarcastiCarrie]

@Lorien - if a natural disaster struck a white upper middle class nieghborhood, would the cameras click in their faces so freely?

The answer is mostly "no", but probably not for the reasons you are thinking (exploitation). Earthquake in a relatively more affluent area (for example SoCal), yes destruction and devastation, but the scale of loss and death is so much less in places with money because of building codes and the more-ample resources of the inhabitents. I'm not from California, but I would think a 7.2 magnitude earthquake would not kill 50,000 people even if it hit LA or San Francisco.
I don't think the recent 6.5 magnitude Eureka earthquake had any fatalities (although, yes, Eureka is less densely populated than Haiti).

[Cloud]

@SarcastiCarrie, Lorien- the 1994 Northridge (LA) earthquake was a 6.7 magnitude quake and killed 72 people.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1994_Northridge_earthquake

I think SarcastiCarrie is right. Our building codes are in place to try to minimize loss of life in a serious earthquake. We would suffer, but not on anywhere near the scale that the people of Haiti are suffering now.

[monkeymama]

@ Geek in Rome: thanks for the referral to Rachel Maddow's show - I need to watch her more. The book Mountains Beyond Mountains, about Partners in Health founder Dr. Paul Farmer, is one of my all-time favorites, and a great one to pick up if you're looking for something hopeful to read about Haiti. Rachel interviewed its author, Tracy Kidder.

[Tonina]

@Lorien: I must respectfully disagree with the notion that the people of Haiti are being exploited by the media. This is a massive disaster; surely we owe it to these people to bear witness to what they have suffered? How could we truly grasp the scope of this situation without the work of these journalists?

Moreover, I believe a disaster in an affluent section of the U.S. would be just as fully covered, if not more so. Think about it - disasters and crimes that affect the poor and disadvantaged are often lightly covered, if at all. But such events happening to the middle class or the wealthy? 24-7 coverage for ages. Think Bernie Madoff and how much coverage and how many specials focused on the wealthy clients he swindled. Or how about Hurricane Andrew in the 1990s? There was extensive media coverage, including many interviews with people who were crying or in shock. In an affluent area today, there would be individuals with cell phones and other video recording devices capturing the devastation and the reactions of the afflicted, in addition to mainstream media coverage.

I know it is difficult to watch such coverage, but it serves a vital purpose. Those images push people to the types of reactions we're seeing on this thread - the desire to help, to send money or supplies, to volunteer. Words simply can't do the same job. I agree that news broadcasts ought to include warnings to parents when graphic video is about to be shown. But eliminating such images from the airwaves would be a grave disservice to the people suffering in Haiti.

[Tonina]

For techie types in DC, London, Silicon Valley, and Denver/Boulder who are looking to help those in Haiti, this info came through NPR's twitter feed a little while ago: http://su.pr/1dZGTV

[hedra]

If you want a targeted program for 'later', look into GlobalGiving.org - they do microgrants for small targeted programs. Similar concepts to things like Heifer International, but really specific and you know exactly where your money is going (plus they're better rated than Heifer).

My sister helps people with money decide where to donate (Planned Giving in particular - that is, in their wills), and she and I both co-run my mom's charitable fund (which is tiny, but gives out $1500 each year minimum to various programs). So we spend a good bit of time figuring out where the money will do the most good (that's her job, after all). GlobalGiving is one of our starting points.

I'll check into which of the child-reach type programs she recommends, I know she has done a LOT of research on that (she supports more than 30 children at different ages through one of the programs, and will pay their college tuition if they go to college, has gone to visit them, etc. It is a worthwhile approach, I'll get back with the details soon...)

And donating to orphanages in Haiti is definitely not a bad idea.

[hedra]

Some of these are 'general' (clearly emergency help) but others are very specific (purchasing wind-up radios for communication support, etc.): http://www.globalgiving.org/haiti-earthquake/

[Jean]

My children--who are 8--are old enough to read the captions under the pictures in the paper and to ask why. Luckily, we don't have a TV so they only see the few photos that are published in the paper. But, we talk about the devastation. And all the things that Haitian children don't have right now (or in general) that we take for granted. I guess we focus on the children and their basic needs. I don't really talk about the death too much. My children have lost all their grandparents during their lifetime so they're accustomed to death, but--for us--it's just not something to dwell on.

They've both suggested donating money (based on ads calling for money in the same paper) and are willing to donate some of their own hard-earned cash.

We've decided to donate to Plan Canada (because they have operations in Haiti already and we sponsor a child elsewhere with Plan). It also helps that we can talk about how this org helps children...just like them. We're also supporting MSF (Doctors without Borders) because they, too, have operations in Haiti and both organizations will be there for the long term. (There are many other worthy organizations, but we had to make a choice.)

In terns of the "racist and icky,", I'm not too sure. I'm Canadian and primarily read Canadian news sources and haven't noticed this. Maybe I'm myopic, who knows?

Thank you so much for talking about Haiti and encouraging people to help.

[Tracy]

Yes, stay tuned for even more opportunities to help in the future. We have been told to expect a lot of refugees here in Florida. So we are getting ready to help with that locally. Also, we have a large Haitian population, and their local churches are coordinating supplies to send to family members. You might want to look for Haitian churches/ organizations here in the US that you can help.

[hedra]

My sister recommends Childreach (Plan USA). There are others that are also good, but this one is way up there.

We were already discussing that next year's donations will include agricultural training/support including livestock (two of my other sisters own livestock and one used to bee-keep as well, so this is near/dear to them). Goats or bees to Haiti may get a bump from us - long-term, goats have a high value (low input/upkeep, high return).

[Lisa]

If they don't distribute the aid, people will definitely carry on dying; if they do distribute the aid, people might trample each other. Maybe we should just have faith in the best possible outcome and get the stuff out, disorderly or not. I had a fantasy in bed last night that soldiers at the airport began breaking ranks and started to throw the stuff over what I imagine are the fences surrounding the airfield.

We gave to PIH on Wed, a group that we have been supporting since reading about them in the NY times. Have not read "mountains beyond mountains" yet. From the updates they send, they have been quite impaired by the quake as well, and have no supplies left.

Forgive my doom and gloom. I think I've always had an arrrogant/righteous indignation streak. Counter productive unless I can actually do something.

Hedra, thank you for the expertise. We will be giving more as soon as there is movement.

I don't put myself in their shoes, I guess its unimaginable for me, or too dangerous (you think I'm mad now?). Instead I fantasize about saving people (self aggrandizing...).
I'm a bit mental over this.

[Foster]

We are in Pittsburgh and are preparing for the hopeful arrival of a plane full of orphans: http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/news/pittsburgh/s_662574.html We are a foster family and are signed up to take in one of the kids as needed. I'm getting together a big bag of stuff to take to the local collection site for these kids, when they get here.

It's important to remember that Haiti has ONE airport & it was severely damaged. They have ONE runway. Planes are circling for hours waiting to be able to land. Supplies ARE getting there, it just takes a long time. There have also been Twitter reports from workers who are trying to get to certain places and they just cannot b/c of the destruction. It's not that the relief effort isn't there, b/c it is, but we are talking about a third world country that is extremely poor. They do not have the infrastructure to respond to such a crisis like we do. We have to keep on praying that the workers can clear the debris to get to the people.

[Shelley]

It is so hard not to despair. My little donation seems so freakin' insignificant in the face of such massive suffering.

On a personal, micro, ultra-navel-gazing level, I've had a major disappointment in a kind of crazy transition time in my life -- not something I was expecting at all, and I am struggling with this a little bit. Mentally though I'm finding the juxtaposition of this "problem" with the news coverage of Haiti -- !!!!!. I guess you could say it's a perspective check to end all perspective checks, and could hope it would change my attitude, but right now I just feel worse and worse.

I wish those who are on the scene, both victims and aid workers who are trying to help, strength, courage and above all speed.

[hush]

@hedra - As soon as I saw this thread, I remembered what your sister does for a living, and was hoping you'd chime in! Thank you for the names of the GlobalGiving and Childreach (Plan USA) organizations.

[FM]

Any news on donating breastmilk? It would be a reason to ramp up pumping, for sure.
Let us know what you find out.
Seriously still thinking about adoption...
Where would you even start???

[pain relief]

everyone should aware on what situation going on in Haiti.

[mlr]

As a physician and former Peace Corps Volunteer, I just want to echo what Geek in Rome so succintly posted. The relief organizations are doing the best they can. God forbid they incite more violence and deaths by not distributing the aid in an orderly manner.

That said, this breaks my heart.

First, because if it were not for my own child, I would be there now -- have 3 friends who are working on the ground right now -- god knows they need more supplies and more hands. (They had too few doctors/supplies to begin with; between the destruction of hospitals and the destruction of infrastructure, they are now in a truly horrific place, health-care-wise.) It drives me crazy that I'm stuck at home when I could be "doing good."

And it also breaks my heart in the ways that all of you have mentioned. I cry every time I see an orphaned baby, or a mom who has lost her kid, or even a mom WITH her kids. It is all just too, too, too sad. And it makes me wonder why I have had a child - why bring someone else into this world of suffering, you know??

(But then again, maybe I can raise her to do good, herself. And maybe the world will improve someday. But the recent news cycles sure make me think we're all going to hell in a handbasket...)

PS: My (very biased) vote for where to give money = PIH. Very little overhead, very efficient in getting the $ where it is needed and in the way that it is needed.

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