First of all, I'd like to think I coined the word Nobelama at 10:09 am Eastern Time today, but maybe someone else beat me to it.
Now, for today's topic. Young crushes.
I happen to know a boy in second grade who has been the recipient of some slightly amorous attention (a kiss on the cheek at recess) from a girl. He seemed conflicted about the attention ("I kind of didn't like it, but kind of liked it."). And then a few days ago he told me how beautiful the girl's eyes are.
Then today I heard about another boy the same age who had a mash note from another child in his class in his school backpack.
This is all too soon!
I'm not talking about early sexualization, which we all know happens and is not good. I'm talking about crushes and puppy love and developing romantic attachments to other kids the same age.
When does it happen? When should it happen? Are we faster here in North America than in other places?
Should I be worried about this? Should you be worried about this?
If 40 is the new 20, and I'm 36 right now, does that mean my son and I could be going through adolescent romantic woes at the same time?
Who was your first real-life crush? (Mine was a kid in the fourth grade, when I was in second grade, who sang "Longer Than" at the elementary school talent show in 1980.) Do you think having crushes like that helps us develop emotionally, or hurts us in the long run?
Talk to me.
Oh, and Moxie, I really don't know if the crushes helped me or hurt me, but there was no way of stopping them. It was like an avalanche of feelings for me.
Perhaps they hurt me a little only because inevitably I just ended up being rejected since these boys were not even remotely interested in hanging out with me. My self-esteem suffered for sure, but it was partially because my mom was never there to explain my feelings to me (or tell me I was still OK even if those boys didn't like me). It probably comes down to how you, as a parent, are able to talk to your kids about crushes. Be kind and gentle. Crushes can be very painful.
Posted by: toomuchstrong | October 15, 2009 at 11:09 AM
Oh crushes... I was terrible! I had a crush on the same boy from kindergarten to fifth grade, Joey L... and another one got added to the list in fourth grade, Brandon "Slick" who all the girls had a crush on, but he could never replace Joey. I still remember, I had gotten gum in my hair and had to cut it out and so I had this little tuft that stuck out of the top of my head... super embarrassing in third or fourth grade. A teacher told me I looked like a peacock, and he said, "I like peacocks!" I'm not sure to this day I've had a bigger swoon than I did at that moment. It's funny, all those kid crushes felt SO INTENSE, maybe more intense than anything since!
Posted by: Bekka | November 13, 2009 at 12:27 PM
Revitol Review - Skin problems can occur at any age, but there may be a way to avoid them by using revitol and it offers 90 days money back guarantee at www.Revitolskincarez.com
Posted by: Revitol | November 29, 2009 at 05:36 AM
Take breaks throughout the day. It will help clear your mind and relieve pressure. Something as simple as going to the water cooler for a drink may do the trick.To help your workday go smoothly, try pacing your activities.
Posted by: coach sale | June 24, 2010 at 11:54 PM
I had in crush when I was nine. It really is nothing to be worried about but trust me I know how you feel i fell head over heels for my crush.
Posted by: Josey Martin | September 03, 2010 at 09:15 PM