You know, it's really difficult to write an internet advice column when your computer won't connect to your wireless connection. Gah. I'm up to here with Vista. I'm coming to you from the cafe near my apartment with the post that was supposed to go up yesterday.
Robin writes:
"Because of my work schedule, my daughter spends the weekend at her grandparents' once a month. Whenever I pick her up, she has a red rash on her cheeks. She doesn't get this rash at home, and after a day or two of putting my regular face lotion on her cheeks it fades away. I've been wracking my brain to figure out what could be causing it, but can't figure it out. (I don't want to say anything to my parents since the rash isn't painful to my daughter and I don't want to hurt their feelings because they seriously overreact to stuff like that.) They have cats, but so do I. She doesn't have environmental allergies. I don't think they're feeding her anything strange.
Do you or your readers have any ideas about what this could be? It's just red and kind of flaky, but not oozy and not really raised. and it doesn't hurt or make her itch."
Hmm. I wish we had a photo of this, as that would make it lots easier to diagnose.
I used to work in test prep, so my instinct is to use process of elimination to narrow down what it could be. I'm going to say that it's not anything fungal because it's not oozy and it goes away so quickly just with regular facial lotion.
I'm also going to say it's not a bacterial infection for the same reason.
It kind of sounds like the rash both of my kids have gotten (my older one grew out of it when he was around 5) from being out in the cold. A red, flaky rash that was helped by putting on lotion but would also go away on its own if I kept him out of the cold for a couple of days. So that may be worth thinking about, especially if she goes outside to play a lot at her grandparents and doesn't so much at your place.
You could take another look at food stuff. You say she doesn't eat anything "strange," but anything with artificial colors or flavors or additives could do it. And individual people are sensitive to all kinds of things (there are even people who are allergic to plain white rice), so it could be something healthy that your daughter's system just has a problem with.
The other thing I'm thinking is detergent or fabric softener on the pillows she sleeps on. That could definitely cause contact rashes. And if her skin gets a breather at your place, plus the lotion, that could explain it.
Readers, do you have any other ideas? Has anyone been through this?
I have an idea: Fifth's Disease. If that's what it is, then it's nothing to worry about. In any given week, it seemed like some kid in the neighborhood always seem to have this when we were growing up:
http://www.medicinenet.com/fifth_disease/article.htm
She didn't say how long it's been going on. But her DD is the right age for it.
Posted by: hush | January 28, 2009 at 11:36 AM
I like Moxie's idea of cold air/windburn, but it also sounds like a possible contact allergy to me. Does she cuddle with anything unusual there? Are quilts brought out of mothballs for her to appreciate? Do they have the new-formula Puffs plus tissues while you use the regular kind? Does she do dishes while wearing those long latex dish gloves?
You could try using (with your ped's agreement) a mild OTC cortisone cream on one cheek and regular lotion on the other next couple of times this happens to see if cortisone clears the rash faster. If it does, allergy or at least chemical sensitivity is supported.
Posted by: effective nancy | January 28, 2009 at 11:49 AM
Contact allergy is a good suggestion. I am the Queen of Rash myself and get contact allergies to all kinds of soaps and detergents, so Moxie is onto something there with the thought that it could be laundry detergent/softener.
I'd also check what kind of soap is being used for bathing. For me, generic lotion soap with a lot of fragrance is a one-way ticket to an excema-type rash -- has to be something really neutral, like Ivory or Dove.
Posted by: Shelley | January 28, 2009 at 11:49 AM
I'd go with the cold too. My son gets red blotches on his face even after 5 minutes out in the cold ( my daughter doesn't). I showed the ped when he was arond 10 months (start of the cold weather) and she said it was the way dry skin due to exposure to the cold shows itself in small children/babies. She suggested moisturiser before going outside, which I usually forget to do, but it does help.
Posted by: paola | January 28, 2009 at 11:53 AM
I have no advice but my 16 month old keeps having bouts with something similar. In our case I've put it down to drooling combined with the cold weather. A few days of intensive moisturizing, and putting Vaseline around the outside of his mouth before we go out into the cold seems to clear it up.
Posted by: Jac | January 28, 2009 at 11:56 AM
ITA some kind of contact dermatitis from a detergent or softener on the pillowcase or towels. Also perhaps a different soap/bath additive than you usually use? My dd just got over something that sounds EXACTLY like this & that's what it was. 1% cortisone applied one time cleared it up.
Posted by: MrsHaley | January 28, 2009 at 11:58 AM
Do your parents keep their house warmer than you do? I have mild rosacea on my cheeks, and my main trigger is heat and sweating. Mine looks like a heat-rash mixed with mild acne. Although I guess there are many possible triggers for rosacea in addition to heat...
Posted by: Miriam | January 28, 2009 at 11:59 AM
I'd try bring a pillowcase from home first.
Posted by: Brooke | January 28, 2009 at 12:01 PM
Does your father have a beard? My husband shaves during the week, but on the weekends, he has a little stubble. If he rubs his cheek on hers to cuddle with her, her cheek gets a red rash on it, similar to what you're describing. Hmmmm...
Posted by: Julie | January 28, 2009 at 12:03 PM
Maybe perfume or cologne? Or fabric softener? I have a lot of fragrance-based allergies, and if DD is sleeping over, she would have body contact with the pillow only if she's wearing jammies from home.
Posted by: karen | January 28, 2009 at 12:05 PM
I don't really have any new ideas of what it might be, but I do have a suggestion to try to get more info: if it is chapping from cold, then putting some protectant on BEFORE exposure might help. I used to buy runner's glide when I ran, to protect my legs from chafing, and I found something similar in the baby products aisle when Pumpkin went through a phase of having chapped cheeks. It is a stick that looks like a little deodorant, and I think Johnson and Johnson Naturals made it. I suspect petroleum jelly would work, too, but the sticks are less messy. We'd put it on before going out on a windy day, and that helped keep her cheeks from chapping.
Also, I think it is worth talking to your parents and comparing laundry brands. I had a polka-dot rash for 6 weeks once before I finally tracked it down to the dryer sheets I'd bought. It is hard to really figure these rashes out, because household products don't have to tell you what is in them, so I couldn't really compare ingredient lists.
Good luck. Rashes are frustrating.
Posted by: Cloud | January 28, 2009 at 12:05 PM
Left field answer: My son nuzzles my husband when he hasn't shaved and gives himself beard burn. :)
But really I vote for contact allergy, if not cold. I get rashes from most laundry detergents. Try sending a pillowcase from home and see if that helps.
Posted by: Shandra | January 28, 2009 at 12:06 PM
It could be the heat source that they have. We have a gas space heater that we use on cold days. Sometime it dries my daughter's cheeks and they turn red. The same goes for the fireplace.
Posted by: Kelly | January 28, 2009 at 12:16 PM
I'd like to second (third? fourth? anyway.) the sheets/pillowcases idea. I have super sensitive skin, and ever time I stayed at my grandmother's house when I was a child-- which was every other weekend-- I would get rashes, especially on my face. It was because she used Tide laundry detergent which is like poison to my skin. Cortisone helps, but the super awesome miracle cream we finally got from my childhood dermatologist (that I still use) was a compound-- it's called acid mantle cream, and has 1% cortisone mixed in. So, it takes care of the rash and then the acid mantle part balances the skin's ph, which is half the battle when it comes to reactions. Best. Stuff. Ever.
Posted by: Summertime | January 28, 2009 at 12:23 PM
Hmm. My immediate family is very prone to rashiness - here are the things that spring to mind:
cold air/windburn from playing outside
beard burn from Grandpa
detergent reaction from pillowcase
hot dry air if they keep their house warmer than yours
reaction form some other chemical exposure - do they get their carpet shampooed a lot. Does she like to lie on the floor with her cheek pressed to it? (I used to do that as a kid...)
It sounds like, if it isn't hurting her much, it might not be worth a conversation if they're sensitive, but some discreet detective work. Next time you're in their laundry room, check out the detergent on the shelf. If you suspect the rug, say "Gosh mom, your rug is so delightfully clean! Did you shampoo it yourself or did you hire someone?" (though it could be one of those sprinkle-on deodorizers...)
Posted by: sueinithaca | January 28, 2009 at 12:26 PM
Maybe they wear wool sweaters while she cuddles up with them? Wool can definitely irritate little cheeks.
Posted by: jbq+h | January 28, 2009 at 12:29 PM
Here's another vote (FWIW) for contact allergy and another pillowcase. Also heat source could be a good guess. If you have radiator type heat at home, forced air can be very drying.
Posted by: MLB | January 28, 2009 at 12:30 PM
I'd tend to think some sort of mild contact allergy to a different soap, laundry detergent, or some such.
I think the only way to really narrow it down is to enlist the grandparent's help. I would think that as long as it's phrased as a straightforward "my daughter seems to have developed some sort of allergy, and I'd like you to help me figure out what it is" rather than "what are you doing to give my daughter a rash", it shouldn't cause offense to ask them about her normal weekend routine. I'd suggest having them make a note of what products they use around her (laundry detergent, soaps, shampoos, etc), and if any of them are different from the brands you use, try sending her with some of your normal brands to see if that makes a difference.
Also, just because you also have cats doesn't necessarily mean that she can't be reacting to their cats. I know many people who will develop a tolerance to the dander of certain individual animals that they are exposed to on a regular basis, but will have allergies to other individuals of the same species. For instance my husbands has mild cat allergies - he no longer experiences allergies from being around our cats, but if he gets into close contact with someone else's cats, he'll have a mild reaction. So it could be that a once a month exposure isn't enough to let her build up a tolerance.
If this continues to happen and the cause continues to be a mystery, it might be worthwhile to have some allergy screening done to see if you can figure out if there are any specific substances that she might be reacting to.
Posted by: Mazlynn | January 28, 2009 at 12:33 PM
My 9 mo gets the same thing on cooler, drier days while at DC - her cheeks/nose gets red and dry, and it clears up after a couple of days with lotion (characterized by sloughing off of the dry skin). The first time it happened, I freaked, but process of elimination proved that hers was weather-related. Never gets it on rainy weeks, etc., but extra compounded during heavy drooling days.
While the grandparents may be sensitive about it, I'm sure that they notice it themselves and may be wracking their brains to figure it out and worried that you're upset about it. Maybe a very neutral conversation with a "let's figure this out" type approach will help. Or maybe not, grandparents are funny sometimes ;)
Posted by: CaliBoo | January 28, 2009 at 12:35 PM
I agree with either a reaction to the cold, or dryness or contact allergy. My son gets the same thing on his cheeks from the cold and my guess is it is also exacerbated by the dryness inside when the furnace is going all the time.
Posted by: Ally | January 28, 2009 at 12:37 PM
Carpet Fresh carpet deodorizer did it for my kid (although the splotchy rash...which was present even on covered skin...went away after a few hours).
Posted by: SarcastiCarrie | January 28, 2009 at 12:46 PM
I used to get a rash on my cheeks. My mom finally realized that if I used one of the cotton pillowcases (rather than the poly-cotton blend one that matched my sheets) it would go away after a few days. So I'm going to second (sixth?) the suggestion of sending a pillowcase from home. Actually, you could just sent a whole pillow from home and avoid some potential weirdness if you really don't feel like explaining the problem.
Posted by: TodayWendy | January 28, 2009 at 01:37 PM
Does she lay on a couch while she's there, perhaps to watch a little TV? I used to get a nasty red rash on my cheeks from the nubby fabric on my parents' couch.
Posted by: deborah | January 28, 2009 at 01:46 PM
My gut says its the detergent they use to wash their bedding.
Posted by: Jen | January 28, 2009 at 02:16 PM
A rash that's not painful? Doesn't hurt? Doesn't itch? And is cured by regular facial lotion? I understand being a worried mom, and wanting total perfection in your child's skin, but this seriously sounds like nothing worth freaking out so much about.
Posted by: anon | January 28, 2009 at 02:29 PM
Contact allergy sounds possible, or my son occasionally gets something like that after a few days of extremely low humidity in my apartment (we have whatever that nasty NYC heating system is that makes all of the apartments so damn dry). Low humidity < 15% or so.
Posted by: ianqui | January 28, 2009 at 02:57 PM
@Anon: I don't see where anyone is "freaking out so much" about it. It's just a request from one mom to another for some BTDT advice. Not to speak for Moxie, but snarky, judgmental replies to sincere requests for help aren't very welcome on this site.
My thanks to all the moms who take time out of their day to share their experiences and advice. And especially to Moxie - this site has been my lifeline more than once for issues that may very well have been deemed 'nothing to freak out about' by some. Because when it comes to my kid, nothing is to trivial IMO.
Posted by: andisays | January 28, 2009 at 03:08 PM
Um, anon. I'm not really sure where the poster is "freaking out so much." If my kid was getting rash, I'd want to know what caused it, if for no other reason than to make sure I didn't inadvertently bring whatever it was into my own home. I'm sure if this were happening to your own skin on a regular basis you'd just live with it? Just not understanding the hostility.
Posted by: Diane | January 28, 2009 at 03:12 PM
Rash is inflammation, and inflammation can lead to problems later. If you can't solve it, you can't. But if you can, with a little investigation, WHY NOT?
My kids had this same rash for a while - kind of a dry shiny rash that would go away. It was the detergent/softener reaction, in our case. It was worst on the child who was post-due (post-due baby syndrome isn't much talked about, because the main issue is they have dry skin that is more prone to rashes - lotion lotion lotion! Not a biggie, but nice to know to watch for).
Same votes here - contact/friction, environmental, cold. Oh, and preventive measures can help - aquaphor is a good barrier as well as a moisturizer. Just have them put it on him regularly (thin frequent applications). :)
Posted by: hedra | January 28, 2009 at 03:33 PM
My daughter gets red bumps from her daddy's beard...it doesnt hurt her but it stays red for a day or two.
Posted by: Jax | January 28, 2009 at 03:58 PM
My husband's mom loves her Glade plug ins.
My son sometimes comes back with irritated skin after being at her house for a bit.
Also, if your son is their all weekend and is around an unshaven cuddly grandpa, he may be getting a scratchy beard rash.
Posted by: Sara | January 28, 2009 at 04:01 PM
I'm guessing a contact rash. My son used to get the worst rash on his cheeks when his grandparents had been holding him. I think it was because he was a little baby resting his face on their clothes, on which they use heavily scented detergent, softeners, and dryer sheets. Now that he's older and not so cuddly, the problem is solved. The in laws always used to comment that he had the rosiest cheeks, and I didn't have it in me to tell them that it only happened at their house!
Posted by: Joceline | January 28, 2009 at 04:39 PM
@andisays and Diane, um, who exactly is being "snarky, judgmental, and hostile" now? Such kind replies to my comment, which I honestly didn't mean to be taken in such a negative way at all! Thank you very much for the benefit of the doubt though. To answer your not very nice question, if this were happening to my own skin and regular lotion cured it? Hmm, I think I'd keep putting the lotion on it. Have a great day.
Posted by: anon | January 28, 2009 at 06:01 PM
do they add cinnamon to anything she eats when she's there? my son would get a red splotchy rash on his face when he would eat a certain brand of instant oatmeal, and I could never figure out why, then when I added cinnamon to applesauce one day, he was bright red wherever the cinnamon touched on his cheeks. the oatmeal was apple/cinnamon.
he can eat cinnamon in baked goods, just can't handle undiluted contact.
I agree that a preventive barrier of something might help.
Posted by: Lisa F. | January 28, 2009 at 06:02 PM
I would also suggest bringing your own pillowcases--pillows even, just to see if that helps clear things up. She may be getting it from the sheets too, if she's s snuggler in bed. So, just pack a set of bedding for her to try out, and you can leave them there/exchange them when she visits.
My toddler gets a rash when we visit Grandma and Grandpa's house because they use a harsher detergent with fabric softeners, etc than we do at home. Even when we bring our own detergent to wash our clothes/sheets, he still gets a rash from the build-up in their washing machine and dryer!
Good luck!
Posted by: Becky | January 28, 2009 at 08:16 PM
"I understand being a worried mom, and wanting total perfection in your child's skin, but this seriously sounds like nothing worth freaking out so much about."
Anon, the corrections given you were gently chiding in reaction to the "total perfection" and "freaking out" parts of your comment. This is a community of people who want to give serious and caring answers to "am I really stupid to ask this?" questions. Your answer plainly said that you thought she WAS stupid to ask, which isn't the point of this forum. All right?
Posted by: liz | January 28, 2009 at 08:21 PM
Anon, I'm willing to take you at your word when you say you didn't mean to be negative (though I'm not sure why you'd need to be anonymous otherwise though). But your first comment did sound negative to me when I read it. And then when people tried to point this out gently, you responded with sarcasm rather than something along the lines of "I'm sorry, that's genuinely not what I meant," and then reiterated your original view that the rash wasn't that important by saying if it were your rash, you'd keep putting on lotion, no big deal.
Like some previous posters have said, people who participate in this forum are supportive of each other, even if they have different approaches to various parenting challenges. Questions here range from really major things like how to talk to kids about death, to little things like mysterious, minor rashes.
I think we all really value the positive atmosphere Moxie's managed to create here, and realize how unusual it is on the Internet -- anyone who's spent any time on Internet forums at all has seen how nasty it can get. And as a reader since day 1, I can assure you that people here are very tolerant and welcoming of all opinions as long as they are expressed kindly.
Posted by: Shelley | January 28, 2009 at 09:56 PM
The FIRST thing I thought was beard burn. My son has sensitive skin, and he always gets a rash when DH doesn't shave for a few days or when he snuggles with his grandpa with has a goatee.
Posted by: AmyE | January 28, 2009 at 09:57 PM
I too am thinking it is from kissing and cuddling! My son gets a rash when his "daddo" doesn't shave that day. It is something I get to tease my husband about....quit kissing B so much!! Now as soon as my son hears me say this he starts laughing and laughing and says "no no Daddo". He gets this rash only on Saturdays and Sundays!
Posted by: B's Mom | January 28, 2009 at 11:20 PM
Does the grandpa have facial hair? Every time my boys spend time with my dad, they have "razor burn" (for lack of a better word) from nuzzling with him. That's all we can figure out because it only happens when they are with him.
Posted by: Sara | January 29, 2009 at 03:45 AM
When I was a child I started getting a strange rash on my hands when at my grandmother's - who lived next door. I was doing embroidery when I was there - I had this red duck that I was cross-stitching - and the yarn had some coloring that was not good. Sometimes the reasons are very specific.
Posted by: Mari | January 29, 2009 at 05:55 AM
Wow, the razor burn is not so unusual. My husband is kind of relieved of his (minute) guilt. :)
Posted by: Shandra | January 29, 2009 at 07:55 AM
I seem to recall Noah over at amalah.com getting a rash on his face like this because his grandpa had confused Clorox wipes with baby wipes...so it's definitely worth a follow-up with the grandparents!
Posted by: MaggieO | January 29, 2009 at 08:46 AM
this reminded me of something. in my 20s, i had a long distance boyfriend who i would only see like once a month. i remember that after he left everytime, i would have a rash on my cheeks and around my mouth... from all the kissing we did (heh). but if he stayed longer than a few days, that would go away. it's like my body was "allergic" to his saliva for a few days and then got used to it?
just a thought. maybe she's just getting lots of love from grandma and grandpa. :)
Posted by: mochi | January 30, 2009 at 01:54 AM
Beware of using cortisone on your face for extended periods of time. It does thin the skin (advice given to both me and to my son from dermatologists/pediatrician).
Posted by: florabora | January 30, 2009 at 02:02 PM
My kid gets contact dermatitis from detergents and lotions with frangrance. But she also gets those "slapped cheeks" rashes when she gets tomato on her face. I use only aveeno lotion for her and it seems to work better than anything.
Posted by: Britt Thain | February 01, 2009 at 10:23 AM
My daughter get rashes on the face from 2 things. Being licked by a dog (maybe the grandparent cats are kissers?) and wool. Cut pile rugs seem to be the worst, I have some flat woven rugs that are not a problem. I bet it's where she is lying down, sofa or floor.
Posted by: beth | February 01, 2009 at 01:57 PM
Could be their cat, even though you have cats. Sometimes we become immune to our own, but not others' cats. Does she get the same rash when she's over at other people's houses who have cats?
Posted by: Shelby | February 02, 2009 at 09:40 PM
At times Vaseline is seen to work miraculously well explaining your rashes.
Posted by: baby slings | May 09, 2010 at 03:06 AM
Happiness is about using each and every tiny desire are available accurate. It is not about getting immortal nor owning food or rights inone's hand.
Posted by: ugg bailey button | September 05, 2010 at 11:22 PM