....and we're back!

Wow. Sorry about that, guys. I just blithely went off on my vacation with my laptop in my sweet new laptop bag (perfect for travel because it's big and you can cram a lot of stuff in it, but probably too big for a trip to the local coffee shop--you'd probably want the sleeve instead) thinking I'd be able to post from my grandma's. She lives in a neighborhood with a lot of college students who don't lock down their wi-fi, so I can always hop on and steal some bandwidth.

Of course, the semester ended a few weeks ago, so no one's there, and not an unprotected wi-fi signal in sight. Duh.

Then when I got back on the grid in the Twin Cities, I was running from dawn (my 3-year-old woke no later than 5:30 every single day) 'til dusk.

Lesson learned: Set posts to auto-post before I leave, even if I'm absolutely sure I'll be able to post from vacation.

But, I had a good beach meet-up with a reader in the Winona area and her sweet fat little baby and funny husband. And the Twin Cities meet-up was good at Chutes & Ladders. We made it through a flash downpour and the fact that I forgot to bring any kind of signage to indicate who I was. I recognized Rudy in Paris right away, because she looks exactly like her online voice. Amy and Julie were there, too. I hope no one else showed up and left because they couldn't figure out who we were!

I always feel a little strange when I meet people who read Ask Moxie. I'm worried that I'm not glamorous enough, and they'll somehow be disillusioned when they discover that I really am just stultifying normal (except, of course, for the laptop bag, which is glamorous). But at the same time that's the whole point, that I'm not that special, just a regular person struggling not to believe the hype. So maybe it's good that I get all red in the sun, and get a little lost in the rental car, and my kids make butt jokes all the time.

Later today I'll post a question that came up at the Twin Cities meet-up.

Comments

[attiton]

Seriously, I was going to call the police, and then I realized...what was I going to say? "There's this woman, she lives in New York, I don't know her name, and she usually posts interesting things to the Internet every day and she's missed four days and I need to find out that she's OK!!"

Ah, modern life.

[caramama]

I'm so completely jealous about this meet up! Moxie and rudyinparis and Amy and Julie!!! Why oh why am I no where near the Twin Cities!!!

Moxie, what I like best about you is that you seem like a normal person. :-)

And I see now that I should have posted the following here, not on the other post:
Speaking of meet ups, I'm setting up another DC Area meet up for anyone interested (info on my blog)! Moxie, don't you want to come down to DC for a visit??? Nation's Capitol... Free museums... Devoted readers... I'm just saying.

[hedra]

It's funny, I am the same way with the 'will I read as well in person?' thing, and wanting really to read more glamorous or perfect in person - even though my point is the same as yours - we're all normal people fumbling along.

[rudyinparis]

Yeah, attiton, the nature of online relationships is a trip, isn't it? DH's cousin was at the meet-up with us. When I told him about the meet-up it became: "Well, no... um... don't know the names. Ah, no, not what anyone looks like, no... A sign? Will someone have a sign? Um, don't think so. It's just... you know... um, it will be obvious... somehow..." And it was, actually, so I felt redeemed.

I admire Moxie for putting herself out there and doing meet-ups and working to prove herself human. Personally, if a group of people were under the impression that I was glamorous and had my crap together, I'm not so sure I would work to dissuade them. I need all I can get.

Last thought--and it's a crazy cliche but--it's true--I thought Moxie would be taller! What is that about?

[SarcastiCarrie]

I figure Moxie for short because she's always picking out impractical shoes with ridiculous heels.

[Charisse]

That sounds so fun!! When are you coming to SF, Moxie? ;-)

[amy]

@SarcastiCarrie: I just figured that was because she lives in New York.

[paola]

I read as normal, fumbling along, but am actually totaaallly glamorous and sophisticated (hehehe).

I think I would have spotted the glasses (if those are your real glasses, that is). I'm one of those people who sees El SubComandante Marcos in a balaclava with only those big brown eyes peeking thru and am absolutely able to identify him in a line up in his civies. I know, I'm just special that way.

[Julie]

Totally not disappointed! I hope YOU weren't disappointed in US!

[paola]

Oh, BTW, is the 60 day challenge over already??? I'm behaving as though it is but need some confirmation.

[Lee]

Glad you had a fun time!

I'm sure your "just stultifying normal" is lovely and glamorous in and of itself!

[pnuts mama]

i've been waiting for a fresh post to hijack since saturday! and now i am seriously jealous that i don't live near the twin cities, although to be honest, i wouldn't have been able to make it as i was a little busy having the bean on thursday!!

he is the sweetest little baby in the world- a good pound bigger that his big sister, and i've been in love with him since i looked down and saw his sweet head poking out of me. speaking of big sis, she is also is love with him, and keeps telling me he is so cute. i'm afraid to let her too close, as she may smother him with good intentions and affection. why didn't any of you tell me that when the 2nd comes along the first gains 30lbs overnight while you're in the hospital? good lord she's enormous (and heavy!) now.

short version: labor was hard (cervix wouldn't dilate due to my 'natural cerclage' of scar tissue) until the beloved epidural and some manual stretching and then everything went fast- so fast in fact that while the dr. left me to start pushing to 'get things started' he almost didn't make back in time to catch the little guy as he self-motivated his own way out of me (literally had a resident standing there holding his head and saying "don't push!" "i'm not!")

i had a fever during labor so their policy is to protect the infant and rule out sepsis and monitor him in the NICU for 48 hours- that was weird and sad for me not to have him with me in my room but we stayed with him as much as we could and brought him home with no problems at all saturday night. had his checkup today and he's perfect and well- all that worry for nothing!

so freakin happy and tired and hormonal and off to nurse and nap. thanks to all of you who have been asking how it's been going and waiting along with us- what an amazing group of friends i am blessed to have here.

[SarcastiCarrie]

Pnuts and Beans Mama - Congratulations. That is wonderful, healthy news.

[rowan+keaton+mama]

Congratulations pnuts mama!!
I'm so sad I couldn't make it on Sunday. I wanted so badly to get out and meet Moxie and the Moxites but the 2 yo had an unexplained fever and the 6 mo is making our lives miserable. Do you think babies can be born to hate their parents?

[rudyinparis]

How wonderful to hear from pnuts mama! Thank you thank you for sharing! Isn't it amazing how the first one instantly becomes Gigantor after the second one arrives? I remember that, too. My happiest regards to you and pnut and bean!

[jennyG]

I'm a chronic lurker, but need to surface and say congratulations to Pnuts *and* Little Beans Mama (and Papa and Big Sis). Thanks for sharing the great news. Rest up and enjoy the beautiful new addition to your family!

[Charisse]

Congrats pnuts mama!!! I remember friends visiting us in the hospital after Mouse was born, with their 5 month old along--that child seemed gigantic. A 3 year old must seem ridiculous. Enjoy your bean and the new beginning!!

[Moxie]

Yay, pnuts mama and baby and pnut and pnuts dad!

[ada]

Congratulations Pnuts mama!

[Lisa]

Welcome, little Bean!

and yes, Moxie, we need you in SF!

[Lisa]

so this is how I envision Rudy in Paris: shortish spiky dark-brown hair, tall, medium build, black leather jacket.

OK, probably not in a Minneapolis summer, but still: metaphorical jacket, perhaps.

Am I anywhere near on target?

[andrea]

Big congrats, pnuts mama!

[Julie]

Yay pnuts mama! I am so happy for you and glad things went well and you are all home and safe. Wasn't it just last month you told us "secretly" about your pregnancy? I'm sure time did not go that quickly for you.

I am with sarcasticarrie.....always assumed Moxie was on the shorter side because of those crazy funky heels.

I think I see rudyinparis with a couple tattoos too.

Please please please come to LA Moxie.

[Bethiclaus]

Glad you're back!

[Lisa V]

I ordered that bag direct from the company today- they had a coupon even!

Thanks for the great tip. I've been looking for a unique laptop bag since last fall.

[Amy F]

She wasn't wearing the glasses! Made recognition tricky and I'd even met her before. Somehow dark hair throws me off.

It definitely wasn't jacket weather, but I wouldn't be surprised if Rudyinparis wears one on cooler days. Am I totally wrong too?

[Suzie]

Congratulations pnutsmama and happy times to you and your family.

[paola]

I reckon rudyinparis has a rose tatoo emblazoned on one of her biceps! Sorry, wanted to get in on the fun too.

Congrats pnut'smom. Hope the name you suffered over suits your little one down to a tee.

Oh, what happens at 17.5-18 months? My little dream sleeper has transformed into a powernapper (45 minutes seems to do just nicely for her, not me) And the 75 sleep regression has been over for 2 weeks. Does learning to climb count as a mile-stone??????

[Helen]

Congratulations to pnut's mama and papa and pnut and bean! So glad to hear that everyone is well.

[rudyinparis]

Ohhhh, can I just say how nice it is here, with such considerate, funny, friendly people? Yesterday, out of nowhere, this huge shit storm--I'm sorry, but there's really no other apt phrase--just blew up among my closest circle of friends IRL, filled with anger, resentment, contempt... Luckily I am only peripherally involved, but yesterday was a very painful, draining day for me and so it is wonderful to come here this morning where there is such good cheer.

Your guesses are hilarious! In reality, I am a seven foot tall Ghanian who only wears rubber, from head to toe. And I have a hook in place of my right hand. Isn't that right, Amy, Julie and Moxie?

Rowan+Keaton+Mama I was wondering where you were! And Bobbi, too.

[hedra]

@paola, 17-18 months is another stage with sleep and food issues. So is 20-22 months. For both, they are starting to hit at more 'individual times' than spot on like clockwork. Sorry.

@pnuts mama! WOO! Congratulations! Beans and peanuts.

Sorry we didn't mention the 'oh my god you're HUGE' thing. Isn't it strange? When did you get so big? And were you ever this little? Really? Wow.

You know the reflex where they arch their backs and stretch out their legs? That's the one they use during labor. At each contraction, they arch their back and stretch out their legs. So labor really is a coordinated effort between you and them. I could feel Bren's feet at the top of my uterus, pushing along with the contractions. Add in a nice efficient uterus, and I was not pushing in the 'curl up and grunt' manner in any way (at least not until requested specifically to do so), and yet, it all worked juuuuust fine without that. Nice coordinated effort. (This is one reason I've been told that very small babies are hard to push out - they can't 'reach' as well nor are they as strong for doing their side of the process).

Anyway, very cool. congratulations. And yeah, know about the 'smother with love' thing - she's three or so? I forget. Anyway, that's typical - and it can get kind of overwhelmingly potent (we called it 'steamrollering' as in 'I know you love them, but please don't steamroller the babies'). But it is also developmentally typical. And it does indicate some mixed feelings hidden in there (poor skills at differentiating the 'HEY!' from the 'LOVE!', so they combine to some major aggressive love... though coaching them to express the positive and negative a la "Siblings Without Rivalry" helps only so much before they have the cognitive skills to separate them on their own.)

Happy happy! Enjoy. :)

[caramama]

Congrats to pnuts mama and pnuts family!!! I'm glad things went overall well and that the baby and you are doing well. Now that mine is 15 months old, I am so amazed when I see smaller babies! I forget they come so small! So I can imagine that when you have another, the older ones seem huge.

rudyinparis - Sorry to hear about the IRL drama. That sucks. Love your description of yourself! Hi-sterical. And I'm sure 100% accurate.

rowan+keaton+mama - I'm sorry 6 months is so rough. I'm happy to say I've blocked out most of that, but I remember the time between 3.5 months and 7.5 pretty much kicked my butt. It's all just a phase, right?

[Rosie]

It was SO nice to meet you and your adorable boys at the beach, Moxie. What a beautiful day, and a great excuse to play hooky from work. (And it was rather a relief that you're a normal person rather than Carrie Bradshaw. (What? Aren't all New Yorkers like that?))

Give me a ring any time you're in the area; would love to get together again. Hope you enjoyed the rest of your vacation.

[Melba]

Congratulations pnutsmama on the new little bean! Wonderful news. :)

[Pippi]

I'm so disappointed I couldn't make it to the meet-up -- my plane left just a few hours before.

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