Is it just me?

An open letter to elementary school parents everywhere:

If you have dropped your child off and are coming out of the building, could you please either keep walking or step aside, so that parents who are coming in with their children can get past you, especially when it's sleeting down rain? I know you like to talk to other parents, but my kids are getting soaked here, and I don't want a late pass because I can't get past you to get in the door of the school.

Thank you.

Signed,

Next Time I Will Cut You

Comments

[Kate]

Star$$. Use it.

[Kate]

I meant that to say, no, it's not just you who has witnessed clueless behavior in all kinds of contexts :-)

[electriclady]

I think these are the same people who step out of a crowded subway train or come to the top of the steps and then STOP to contemplate their next move.

[Shannon]

When I was a teacher, there were some parents who congregated to chit-chat IN the classrooms! So distracting! And when they congregated just outside the school, we knew they were talking trash about us.

[Becca]

Here's the suburb version... parents who won't let you cross the parking lot first even though you are on foot in the rain and they are in their nice warm car with their Starbucks after dropoff. Makes me crazy!

[lucy]

Similarly the people at the station as the subway pulls in and comes to a stop that are standing right in front of the door ready to push you over as you emerge. And they say we live in a civilization.

[pnuts mama]

there's an older lady who comes to the pool at least an hour before her class and camps her ass out 'getting ready' every friday- she *has* to be at her *specific* locker, and will not wait even a minute while the rest of us moms are wrestling our kids out of their suits/swimmy diapers/etc. to get to her locker once she arrives.

i finally had it a few weeks ago. she was making comments about not being able to get to *her* locker immediately- and i was like "listen lady, you are one adult, and (the woman who was 'blocking her') this mom is trying to take care of her four children- it would be much easier for you to find a different locker rather than expect her to herd all of these kids out of your way." she kind of mumbled some crap about her locker (the lockers are public btw, it's the Y for gods sake) and went to another area of the locker room.

the mom later thanked me for saying something- it had been going on for months and i just couldn't handle her self-absorbed bs anymore. the funny thing is i usually wouldn't say anything, or i would be unbelievably nice about it- it's my husband who has no problem making loud comments about rudeness by others (like folks who don't bear right or hold doors) and i'm always like "shhh- be nice!" also funny- if you met my husband and i you would probably assume that the roles would be reversed- i'd be the one to speak out and he'd be more passive. but no.

[caramama]

Yeah, I think this letter should be opened up to cover people everywhere. Quite being so self-involved and notice others around you! The world is a better place if you are considerate to everyone else.

@pnuts mama - Yeah for saying something!

[Amy]

Right there with you... and can we add to the letter the moms at swimming who "save" a dressing area while their kids are in class so that if your kids get out first you can't get in to change them... but when you go ahead and take the empty dressing room (despite its clothing contents), the moms get pissy because all of their things are in there! Well, duh! Adhere to the signs that ask you not to "save" dressing rooms!!! Wait your turn like everyone else!

[Katy]

And when you are parking your huge minivan or SUV (yes, I have one too) at a place where many people are getting kids in/out of the car (actually, anywhere) please try to center yourself in your space! It makes me nuts to come back to the car with my baby and not be able to even open the door enough to get him inside, because the nice person next to me is parked on the line. When I park, I will often pull out and back in to make sure I am in the center of the space, out of respect for others who might park next to me.

I agree with caramama - "Quite being so self-involved and notice others around you!"

[Melba]

Yes yes yes! People who do this at schools, in parking lots, at the pool, at the mall, in the grocery store... drive me nuts.

Recently I was at the pool, and the change room has a pack 'n play in it. So I change munchkin first, put her in the pack 'n play, then change myself. The other day a lady had draped her clothes on the side of the pack 'n play, and was all snotty when my baby pulled them in and proceeded to play with them. Like I was irresponsible for not monitoring her every move. That's what the pack 'n play is for, lady, so I can stick my kid in it and change in peace without a hand on her at all times. Geez. Don't these people have kids themselves??? Why don't they get it???

[caramama]

p.s. I LOVE how Moxie signed this letter. I've been chuckling about it all day.

[wealhtheow]

A few years ago I was on the metro and noticed an older lady (50+) holding a little girl in her arms, standing up. Sitting down in a seat reserved for seniors and the disabled was a young 20-something girl reading the bible. I wanted to say to her "What do you think Jesus might do in this particular situation?" I regret not doing so.

[Alex]

While we are on the topic, perhaps parents who drop off their kids could also remember that they are parking in someone's neighbourhood? In my neighbourhood, parents park on both sides of the street, regardless of the direction of traffic, halfway up the next side street (my street), and usually leave their cars running, while they pick up/drop off. The could be more considerate for this part of the process, too.

[Shannon]

I'd like to forward your note to the people who will not let me off at my subway stop before pushing their own way in. I do not understand this. Why do they want me to stay on the train with them? Do they think the ride will be more fun if I am yelling bloody murder at them until the next stop?

To make it worse, I ride to the end of the line. So people are pushing on to a train that is now going to sit still in the station, doors open, for at least 2 full minutes.

Thank you for your time in allowing me to state this.

Signed,
Next Time I'll Get My Friend Moxie To Cut You

[Ali]

Oh my god, yes. We have a drive up and drop-off/pick-up system at the Peanut's preschool. And people will just get out of their cars while they are in the line, never mind that there are six cars behind you who are now TRAPPED while they leisurely stroll up to the door. Oh, I dream of cutting them, too.

[carmie]

How about cutting the group of teenagers who stopped in the middle of the exit to the grocery store last night to collectively light cigarettes? AGH.

[cheesefairy]

@alex, oh yes, I have this neighbourhood too. suburban, lots of families live close to the school across the street but everyone is getting dropped off, I can't even get around the corner so I can leave the g-d neighbourhood and get to my doctor's appointment across town. TELL YOUR LAZY KIDS TO WALK. The end.

[Aaron]

Or how about when you are at the mall and need to take an elevator b/c you have your child in a stroller and there is a line of perfectly capable people standing infront of you. Take the stairs people!!! I would, but I can't, now I have to wait for your sorry, lazy butts in order to go up/down a floor. UGH this is my biggest pet peeve since having N, 9 months ago. Drives me crazy!!!

[Jenn]

Right there with Ali. If you MUST kiss and hug your kid goodbye in the morning when you drop them off, please for the love of all that is good and holy in this world, pull in to a parking space and then get out of your car to kiss, hug and wave goodbye like a spastic seal. That will save all of us cold, heartless beyotches from accidentally running you over in the drop-off line while we slide open the minivan doors and tell our kids to "stop, drop and roll."

[catmom]

You don't realize it, but it was probably your parents who taught you how to do this - be aware of other people, not stop in the middle of the (doorway, sidewalk, crosswalk, whatever), to just move to the side and be aware of getting out of someone else's way. I realized this once I got married - my husband was NEVER taught this behavior by his parents, and as a result, he can be a real blockage in a lot of public areas. Forgive him - he's not trying to act entitled, its just that he is really , literally clueless.
The solution is probably posting, like Moxie, and teaching your own children, and while you are teaching them, sort of loudly narrating what you are doing to gradually, each day, clue the unclued. "Okay, honey, we're going to move to the side here to put on your coat so we don't block other people trying to come in." Let the others hear you, but in a sweet gentle way, not an I'm-pointing-out-how-rude-you-are way.

Thanks for this post. This kind of behavior is insanely frustrating to me.

[Amy]

Next time I will cut you? I hope that means cut in line.

I can relate, but really - everyone leads such busy lives. Including yourself obviously or you wouldn't be worried about being late. What's the big deal? It's a crowded world we live in.

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