Arrrgghhh! Little League T-Ball has started, and while my older son loves it (the cool uniform jersey, pants, and matching hat sent him into ecstasy), the amount of time it sucks on Saturday mornings, along with trying to fit it around the little one's swim lesson (which he loves, too) is throwing off my entire week. It's making laundry strange (remember we don't have our own machine, and the one on our floor sucks, and our elevator's out for another 8 weeks still, so everything has to be hauled up and down four flights of stairs) and that throws things off even more.
Any tips for sequencing better? You guys will get halfway decent Ask Moxie posts during the week once I get out from under the pile of laundry and hauling kids to not-that-close sports fields.
(As an aside, at the opening ceremony following the opening parade for the Little League season, a priest from the local Catholic school gave a blessing. Which I thought was a strange and inappropriate conflation of church and open-league sports, but whatever. Anyway, part of the opening prayer was to "help the parents keep things in perspective." Which made me guffaw.)
well, at least the priest had things in perspective, no?
No help on the scheduling thing. We have ONE outside activity that isn't directly tied to school, and it involves only one day a week and no uniform (equipment, but no uniform). When we had two, um, well, thankfully, G decided that the additional activity was sucking up too much of his life. So we just have one. Maybe M and R will want to do painting or gardening or something that doesn't involve going anywhere... yeah. Dreaming! Sigh.
Good luck. Sorry about the laundry suckage.
Posted by: hedra | April 17, 2008 at 12:43 PM
I am sympathetic to your plight, without too much help to offer. Would it be possible to shift the swimming lesson from Saturday to a weekday? Let the babysitter take him? Then you can devote Saturday just to t-ball and laundry. I used to have some success with this, but I see a future of kids all going in different directions at different times. I hope your laundry situation improves soon; no elevator was bad enough when I was much younger and childless, I cannot imagine it now.
Posted by: Alice | April 17, 2008 at 12:59 PM
I vote for using the not-good-at-all washing machine on your floor for the next eight weeks and then going back to whatever was working before. The convenience factor alone might make up for half-washed clothes.
Posted by: SarcastiCarrie | April 17, 2008 at 01:16 PM
Now, see, your situation is a perfect answer to Annette from earlier in the week who felt things were strangely under control. Everything calm? Just enjoy it and don't ask questions! Soon enough your kids will be in t-ball, have swimming lessons, and the best washing machine will be four floors down.
This is the kind of thing I read and I start getting a mini-panic attack. Neither of my kids are in any activities (not even school) yet, and I feel overwhelmed by the limits on my time as it is now. Oh my God, what am I going to do? They will need to be locked in the attic. Obviously.
Posted by: rudyinparis | April 17, 2008 at 01:40 PM
Laundry: we schlepp laundry for four down four flights of steps...so I know all about that. My advice is that on Wednesdays (or whatever week night) one parent cooks dinner and the other takes your youngest with him/her to put in one or two loads of laundry. The kid should be responsible for getting/holding the quarters. I know you probably generate 6-8 loads per week at least...but one load mid-week seems to make things a lot better. I've found it is important to limit mid-week laundry to a load or two...because otherwise you are still folding socks at 11:00.
Posted by: michelle | April 17, 2008 at 01:41 PM
folding socks? there's the problem right there. Do Not Fold Socks. You crazy kids!
Posted by: shirky | April 17, 2008 at 01:57 PM
Folding laundry? Does that mean dumping it on the bed in the morning and then dumping it back into the basket at night? If so, for us, that takes almost no time at all.
Posted by: Julie | April 17, 2008 at 02:03 PM
Take the grown-up stuff to a wash & fold place on the way to baseball for the next few weeks. Cuts the loads in half, and treats you and the mister a little bit while everything is too nutsy to do laundry.
Posted by: Heather | April 17, 2008 at 02:13 PM
Oh no is this Bad Laundry Karma day? Counting my blessings, I do have laundry in my unit...but I was just informed (by my housecleaner, another blessing) that lighter fluid got spilled on/in my dryer and therefore it's not safe to use until it gets looked at...but of course there's only a couple companies that repair my brand in SF...and, well, crap.
@Julie, haha that is us too!!
Posted by: Charisse | April 17, 2008 at 02:18 PM
And if one irons. Fortunately I don't much. Only dh's shirts and a few linen things in summer. I know of Italian mothers who stay up till the wee hours ironing, every damn night (you can spot the only foreign kid in his class by the state of his smock).
I hated Saturdays for weeks around Christmas time as my son was having swimming lessons (baby+parent - yes he was definitely the oldest baby in the class, going on 3))and I was the poor shmuck that had to take him. I loaaaatttheed it- he just wouldn't do anything the instructor told me to tell him to do. He just played with all the toys while the real babies were putting their heads under, going down the slide, blowing bubbles etc etc. I pleaded my husband to take him, but he insisted I had a stronger constitution and going from the cold in the locker room to the warm water and then back to the cold again would be hazardous to his health ( poor delicate flower). Anyway after Noah started kindergarten in January, he came down with one virus after the next and fortunately we never went back to the pool- Yippee!!!!
So that's what I'm hoping will happen in future with any other sports activities my kids might be interested in. Uhh, I am an evil mother, aren't I , wishing my kids get sick so I don't have to take them to soccer/ballet/karate/violin lessons.
Posted by: paola | April 17, 2008 at 02:23 PM
heh, and i was seeing the connection of the priest with your little league as a being a conflict of interests for him- i know i'm in the minority here (don't throw things at me!) but could competitive sports BE anymore anti-christian? (we're all equal! except for you, losers! or prayer before a game. augh!)
sigh- laundry in a building is the worst- esp if you have to haul it down multiple flights of stairs and try and work around everyone else in the building. what if you paid the sitter an extra amt. to haul for you for the next few weeks? better chance of getting a spot in the AM?
does your Y offer an evening class for elP? that's available? i know ours does one toddler evening a week- how nice for working parents, right?
which raises a question for me- do i sign pnut up for the Y gym/swim she's in for the next 8 weeks and pray that babybean doesn't come sooo early that she misses too many of the classes at the end? she loves that class so much, i feel horrible that i'm even considering skipping it this session. (it's also a nice way for me to get out of the house with her that is dr approved). hmm.
Posted by: pnuts mama | April 17, 2008 at 02:32 PM
Since I do have my own washer and dryer, I've been getting in the habit of just doing a load of laundry when there is one. I figure it's a good habit to have *before* the baby gets here. Folding/putting away is still another matter though...
I fold my socks. It keeps them organized. But then, all my (and DH's) socks are handknitted wool, and while they get machine washed, they hang dry. Y'all probably think I'm crazy now!
Posted by: Katie B. | April 17, 2008 at 02:34 PM
My iron is still in the box. From a wedding shower. 4 years ago. My mom is still wondering where she went wrong.
Posted by: rowan+keaton+mama | April 17, 2008 at 02:35 PM
On another time-saving note.....for whatever reason I have always washed all of Alex's clothes in the same load, despite things being white or colored. Believe it or not, but nothing has bled or stained. I like to think that the makers of children's clothes understand the need to simplify parents' lives and have made their clothes bleed-free. I know this is not true, but it is what I choose to tell myself, and now you too. So really Alex gets one load of wash done per week - everything all in there together. I'm pretty certain El C's polyester baseball pants could be washed in Charisse's lighter-fluid washer/dryer with no damage, so feel free to abuse them however you see fit.
BTW, wondering how Charisse got lighter fluid in her dryer. Here are my theories:
-babysitter spends naptimes building campfires, set the fluid on top of the dryer while getting the lint to use as kindling.
-dad is a professional bbq-er and accidentally left his pint-sized and personalized lighter-fluid dispenser in his pocket.
-pet kitty cats are closet pot-smokers and accidentally left their lighters in the dryer after last night's toke session.
Posted by: Julie | April 17, 2008 at 02:36 PM
@paola- not any worse than me praying our kids are completely talentless when it comes to sports related things...art classes we can handle. seasons worth of games? not so much.
and when my husband had to wear a shirt and tie everyday is when i started sending his shirts down to the cleaners. 30 cents a shirt (or whatever it was) was SOOO worth my not having to iron them. and this was well before i had a kid.
Posted by: pnuts mama | April 17, 2008 at 02:36 PM
Unfortunately this one does just tend to mushroom/spiral out of control, etc. You have to really evaluate the worth of the program vs the impact it makes on family life - and if it comes out as valid, sigh and deal...
How about a Friday evening laundry party night? Make it as fun and goofy as possible (Contests! Prizes! Exotic Vegetable Treats!) Make it a family event and get it done well in advance of Saturday mayhem.... I think this will only work for the warmer months, but evenings are lovely this time of year. Each boy could have a small cloth laundry bag of his own - you could get markers and make them really kewl (I'm thinking "Eeeeuuuwww!" "That Smells!" "Dirty Socks!!!" "What died in here?" written in different color sharpies all over.....? With illustrations as ability allow?
Posted by: enu | April 17, 2008 at 02:43 PM
Good suggestions on the laundry above - also consider after-dinner/after kid bedtime jaunts to the laundrette with laptop and wifi? We have in-home washer/dryer and I still do a couple of loads of mid-week laundry so as not to get bombed on the weekend (also we mostly hang to dry, which requires planning as I do not (yet) possess the Enormous Drying Rack of Doom).
As for the conflicting sports thing, this seems to be the way of life for lots of people, and the answer (for those in two-adult households) is split it up. Our soccer coach was supposed to be coaching two games (he also does his son's baseball) at the same time last week, poor man.
Our sports dilemma is the weeknight practices, which begin at 5:45 and take place at the after school care location (YMCA). Since my daughter has inherited my Must Eat Now metabolism, waiting for dinner until after soccer is not possible. So we have been doing half-assed picnic dinners between 5:15 and 5:45 at the YMCA. Not the greatest solution, though.
Posted by: flea | April 17, 2008 at 03:02 PM
I get home an hour after the last wash of the day at the laundromat, so that's out for me. I think I'm just going to have to use the half-assed machine on our floor for the next 8 weeks for simplicity's sake.
Also, in reading this I'm realizing that a big part of my problem is that it's hard for me to fathom that a child of mine wants to be in Little League. It's just so foreign to my family's culture. Swim lessons I understand (and we're doing Saturday because the instructor is AMAZING), but Little League? Just makes no sense. And he's in love with it.
Posted by: Moxie | April 17, 2008 at 03:30 PM
Hi Moxie: yeah that's an area where city life is often the pits (we had an in basement laundry, but it was way too dangerous for my Mom to go there alone.)
WRT your kid being in little league - that's one of the things about parenthood which has so amazed me - how they form these interest (from where?) and then advocate for their right to pursue them.
My little one decided on all kinds of things I had never considered or in some cases heard of. Taekwondo! Fencing!!! Japanese! Um.... Bassoon.........!!!! That last one, just very recently. They all have their downsides, for sure finances: (bassoons are outrageously expensive to rent) Time: OMG, another weekly lesson! But you don't want to kill their dreams, especially things they come up with all on their own.
My lean, mean, fighting machine of a fledgling bassonist thanks me, I'm sure, "arigato, okaa-san!"
Posted by: enu | April 17, 2008 at 03:57 PM
@Julie, more haha, thank you! Unfortunately, not nearly as interesting as your theories--we usually store the lighter fluid inside one of those bbq coal-lighter chimney gizmos, in a closed cabinet that is above the dryer...in my frazzled getting ready for Mouse's park-bbq birthday party this weekend, I took the lighter fluid out of the chimney because we didn't need it and I haven't finished putting everything back yet...as near as I can reconstruct (this is a thing where a little spanish and a little english and a phone call aren't quite enough!) my housecleaner, who's fairly short, knocked the now unprotected bottle off the shelf and (it being plastic--didn't they use to be metal?) it broke. Gah. Still not sure how bad the spill was, but not about to chance it!
@Moxie, that one would confuse me too--I was all about the individual sports. But Mr. C played everything and hopes that Mouse will too, so I'm sure we'll be there in another year or so. Wow.
Posted by: Charisse | April 17, 2008 at 04:10 PM
@Moxie
Would getting your own machine be a ridiculous prospect? I know how small a NYC apartment can be ( I too lived in 470 square feet of space a life-time ago in HK), but now they have really compact washer/dryers, which you can tuck almost anywhere, and as I am assuming you have as much to wash as I do, it might save you the heartache. Frankly I just couldn't even fathom all that laundry, and having to haul it down all those stairs, wash it, dry it and haul it back up.
Forgive me if I'm ignorant, but do you have to pay to use the washers or are they a benefit of living in that apartment block. And if you do have to pay, might it work out to be cheaper to have your own washer that you can use when it's more convenient?
Posted by: paola | April 17, 2008 at 04:24 PM
pnutsmama, can you negotiate a partial swim deal where you pay for what you attend? can someone else take the big sib while you nurse on the sofa and watch "Sex and the City" reruns (wistful memory of my son's babyhood)
I wash all our clothing together on cold. Sheets, when I get around to it, on warm. Towels, again when I get around to it, on hot.
Posted by: Heather | April 17, 2008 at 04:25 PM
My best advice after navigating 4 nutty little schedules is one activity per kid at a time. When the activities conflict, divide and conquer.
Laundry- can you afford to send some of it out temporarily? I can't imagine life without a washer and dryer with kids. You have my sympathy.
Posted by: Lisa V | April 17, 2008 at 04:26 PM
Re: laundry, last wash of the day? That just seems so wrong. There's a new perk of living in a college town: 24-hour laundry, often with beer!
Re: sports and family culture, I signed Casper up for soccer in a misguided, possibly insane hope that it would make us/her more "normal." She is the Ferdinand of soccer: although at the top of the age range of the team, she likes to sit and pick flowers rather than learn throw-ins. What was I thinking?
Posted by: flea | April 17, 2008 at 04:27 PM
Just feeling your pain here...spring soccer just started for my 2 older kids, which means separate practices during the week and saturday and sunday games. at different times...not sure if we'll do soccer again next year. Schlepping the younger 2 to all the older 2's stuff and tag teaming it all leaves no time for anything else.
Ugh!!
Posted by: Bobbi | April 17, 2008 at 04:27 PM
Echoing Paola:
We have one of those tiny all-in-one washer-dryers (brand: LG) that hooks up to your kitchen faucet. Ridiculously expensive. Does a great job. Saved My Marriage After Baby.
Posted by: Lisa | April 17, 2008 at 04:35 PM
Flea! Half-assed picnic dinners before soccer! Yes, we've done that. It worked well for us when Snuggly Girl was 5 though there was a lot of adrenaline on my part in getting the timing right and making sure it was something she'd eat.
Posted by: Madeleine | April 17, 2008 at 04:48 PM
I can relate...there's never enough time! First, we too are in swimming. I've quit washing the swimsuit every week. At the pool, when my son showers, I make sure the suit gets a good rinsing, too. Then it gets spun dry, and when we get home, it hangs on a hook for the next week. As for the towel, I don't really notice the extra towel, but I suppose to eliminate having a separate towel, you could take a bath towel that's reasy for laundry and just use that one last time for swimming.
As for laundry, I agree with whomever said they wash the kids' clothes together. I have never separated the kids' clothes and we've never had a problem with red sweat pants and white shirts. Weird, I know. But I just throw the whole thing in with Oxi-Clean on warm, and we're good. That being said, I think you could combine the kids' clothes. I've figured out that many small loads are way easier than monster loads. Instead of "laundry day" I now do laundry every day. It takes almost no time at all to throw in one load, dry it, and then fold it. Even if I don't get to the folding part until bedtime, it's 10-15 minutes max to fold that one load. (I take it one step further and keep a basket in every person's closet so the loads are already separated by person--no sorting, and if you don't get to folding/putting away, at least you can stick the basket of clean stuff in their rooms and they can sift out what they need.) I realize that space might be an issue there, but minimally if you do a combined load more often that might still save time. I like the suggested to combine the laundry with some other task. Can you throw the load in on your way to drop your son off at school? (I'm making up your routine here, of couse.) Then throw in the dryer when you get back (you're already on the stairs). Or bring something to multitask, even if it's a picnic breakfast/lunch.
As for activities, I think many of us struggle with this.Is there an opportunity to divide up the duty? Both my kids are in one thing each...ONE! (Baby in ECFE and 4yo in swim lessons.) You'd think that with one activity each, we would manage. But nope, the only option for us was Wednesday night, for both things. So we have divided and conquered on this. Hubby does swim duty, I do ECFE. The downside is that we lose out on the shared family experience. But, it's nice because we have figured out our respective routines and that makes the night go smoothly. We've addressed the family time thing by having Hubby come home from work early so we can all have dinner together first. Then we reconnect after for bedtime and prayers.
Not sure if you can find anything helpful in all this. But I thought I'd unload how we do it. Good luck...I'm sure the answer now will evolve as the kids grow. Egads!
Simone
Posted by: Simone | April 17, 2008 at 05:00 PM
You know, they also make all-in-one washers and dryers. I know this because of our frequent trips to Best Buy to play "doing laundry". They're fairly compact, but not sure how well they work. Also not sure it would work in a small apt. and not sure if you'd even have the hook ups for them. Sucks.
I'm sure you've already thought of this but sounds like El G can do the swim lessons with El P, and you can do the little league with El C.......and then maybe alternate so you can get a taste of both? I'm thinking I'd go for the little league....mostly because it's pretty easy to pretend to be riveted to the game while really you're reading a book. Not so easy to do when your little one is swimming in a big pool.
And maybe secretly hope that El C doesn't do too much playing so that you don't have to wash his uniform every week.
Posted by: Julie | April 17, 2008 at 05:29 PM
@ Julie-You're theories, especially the cat-toking, are hilarious and seriously made my day. I'm going to second (or third?) the practice of washing all the baby's clothes in one load, I've been doing that for a while and love it.
Posted by: elisa | April 17, 2008 at 05:44 PM
oh charisse, i wanted to play the guessing game too! oh well.
and julie, yeah, what's with that, i totally wash all of pnuts clothes together w/o any problem. hmm. i do a separate wash of her towels/bibs/linens.
AND for you swimmers out there, i learned a valuable lesson to wash our suits and caps in one of those delicates mesh bags- keeps them safe from being snagged on whatever else is in the wash. this is the same bag i use for her socks so we don't lose most of them.
oh moxie, can you imagine your neighbors reaction to a washer/dryer in your apt? poor you and lod having to read their notes on your door over it!
i think i'm going to be optimistic and sign her up for the classes. there really isn't anyone that can take her if worse came to worse, but i have seen some kids go in with the instructor while a parent has sat out the class on the bench, so there's that. plus, it's finally getting to be nice enough out that we can finally go w/o having to schlep winter coats and crap along, too. awesome!
Posted by: pnuts mama | April 17, 2008 at 06:50 PM
Well, I have two kids, two sports but my own washer. I've worked to simplify anyway. Here's my system.
Each child has a box to hold all their gear and must be filled before I next feed them. (Minor incentive) I want it all in there. Then, I pull out kid laundry and separate it into only two loads: Can-Be-Bleached and Other. It helps a ton to keep it separate from adult laundry. Each child has only one brand of socks- all white, underpants sizes are marked large in Sharpie inside, so sorting is easy, folding infrequent, ironing... heh- what's that? When uniforms are clean I return them to the box. Do I care if I'm sitting them on top of muddy cleats? Not really. As for a swim suit? Maybe he should just take it into the bath with him- a quick and easy way to wash that.
I'd time the wash for Mondays since you have t-ball on Saturday. Then it might fall into place. Just wait til next year tho-- when t-ball ends, they start practicing more often! My 6yo has one practice and TWO games each week! His brother has one practice and one game. Both always have a game on a Saturday but practices are floating which drives me nuts. This is my first time to have two kids with two activities and I'm barely staying afloat. I truly sympathize.
Posted by: Jill in Atlanta | April 18, 2008 at 08:03 AM
Moxie, is it out of the question to do laundry in the morning? Maybe it's worth getting a load or two washed in the morning, then hang it all up to dry during the day. (Maybe your kids would find this hilarious, seeing clothes all over the apartment one morning a week?) As for sports scheduling, could one parent take one kid to his activity and the other parent take the other kid to his activity? I know that's not very family-oriented, but it might make things more do-able. I was the "single swimming parent" for my daughter's lessons because my husband didn't/doesn't like the change rooms.
Posted by: heather | April 18, 2008 at 09:34 AM
I'm with Simone - one load every day is way easier than six loads on one day. I wash everything together except the diapers. In the morning I throw a load in on my way out, which takes no time. As soon as I can get to it when we get home I move it to the dryer, which again is almost no work. If the kid scene is relaxed I fold the clothes after dinner, otherwise after bedtime. When it's only one load it takes five minutes. (I do have my own washer... I wouldn't be washing cloth diapers if I didn't.)
Major bonuses: Because pretty much everything is pretty much always clean, no one needs very many clothes.
Posted by: chaser | April 18, 2008 at 11:05 AM
No help on the laundry (4 flights? I moan and groan about having to carry everything from the 2nd and 3rd floors to our creepy basement.)
As for Little League, though ... I love baseball season around here. Yes, now that we're in tee-ball and playing games (as opposed to the 3-4 y.o. league that just had free-for-alls on the baseball fields), we have practice every Thursday and a game on Saturday and again on Sunday. But seeing all these kids and there families out on the fields in the city restores my faith in our goal to raise our kids in the city. I also get regular reminders of what a small world we actually live in here, as each game ends up being against a team that is comprised of friends of JR's from different parts of his life (kids from last year's team, kids from his old preschool, kids from his current school, kids from our neighborhood, kids from church, kids from his soccer league, etc., etc.) Besides, I love watching the faces of kids when they accidentally catch a ball or remember to run to first rather than third base after they've hit the ball. I love watching the parents wander the outfield picking up random kids searching in the grass for bugs and worms and turning them, yet again, to face homeplate. I love the kids' questions "Am I going to get to bat this inning?" "Where's shortstop play?" "When's snacktime?" "Can I go to the potty?"
For ten weeks, our life is baseball all the time. And then it's over, and we're back to having no excuses for not doing the laundry.
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