Sooo tired...

So I'm not doing well at getting to sleep by 10 or 10:30 at all. I just have so much to do, and my cycles seem to be off. I could totally fall asleep at 7 pm, but then get a second wind when I have all that stuff to do later on, so I end up staying up until midnight (or later!) and then I'm a wreck in the morning.

It doesn't help that the little one isn't falling asleep until 9:30 some days(!) and then he wakes up at 6:15. (Yes, I've tried taking away the nap, and it does nothing except make it worse for everyone.)

But I read this and realized I'm not the only one: One-third of workers catching zzz's on job. Holy crap, people--you can sleep at work?! If 1/3 of workers are actually falling asleep at work, how many of us are just tired?

And I guess I shouldn't feel so bad, since the average wake-up time is 5:35 am. That's just brutal.

I should also feel lucky, because once I finally do go to sleep I have no problems falling asleep and staying asleep (cats notwithstanding). I know some of you are having problems with that, though, so I thought those of us who sleep well could share with those of you who don't.

My top tips for sleep:

1. Don't have kids or pets. (Ha! OK, I know it's not really funny, but at least it reinforces the point that it's really not your fault.)

2. T-Tapp. Honestly, they should put me on the payroll at this point, but that was the first thing I noticed. Within two days of starting T-Tapp I was falling asleep and staying asleep. It helps your lymphatic system and your hormones, and somewhere in there it becomes easier to sleep.

3. Magnesium. It helps your body relax, and shortages can increase anxiety. Some people do foot soaks in warm water and magnesium oil a couple times a week. Others just take a calcium-magnesium supplement about 20 minutes before they go to bed.

4. Omega 3s and B vitamins. Help with the hormonal balance and decrease stress, so you can fall asleep.

5. Water! If you find that you end up in that half-sleep state in which you're asleep but it's not restful, you may be dehydrated. Drink some more water for a few days in a row and see if that helps.

6. Actually go to bed. That episode of Lost will still be on your DVR tomorrow.

Anyone else?

Comments

[Maureen]

Hi Sam... we did a version of the dream sleep when we were sleep training the twins. It worked for us as we tried to keep the boys on the same schedule and also to help them sleep a little longer slowly over time and also avoid the waking up fully crying hungry mode in the middle of the night. Our version of dream sleep feeding was to have the bottle warmed up and ready, lights off the full time, get the baby up very quietly (I didn't feel safe feeding either of them in their crib), start feeding them very quicky so that even if they woke up it wasn't much and they pretty much were close to asleep or back asleep the whole time they ate (they'd eat a little less this way typically but I think that was part of the plan). Burp them ever so gently on my shoulder, no diaper change, and then move them back to their crib. If they woke up some, it was okay, as they weren't typically fully awake so they'd go back to sleep pretty easily. Over the a couple of weeks, we'd try to shift out the time we fed them 15 minutes, then 30 minutes, etc. to eventually weed out the one middle of the night feeding. Agree with Hedra, the key was to do the dream feed just right before they would normally wake up.

Good luck.. I soo remember how desperate I was in those early days (months). We had a night nanny come in a couple of nights so we could get a good chunk of sleep. I can't recommend that enough. When my husband was back at work and I was still home on maternity leave, he'd watch how desperate I'd become (soooo tired and as a result pretty emotional and overwhelmed), then we bring in the night nanny for a night. Next day was always better once I got a chunk of sleep.

When I saw a neurologist recently for migraine issues, I saw a pamphlet in his waiting room on the RLS. I know they do have drugs out there for that now if you decide to go that route. Otherwise, as Meggiomoo mentioned, I've also heard the potassium thing helps some.

[maeve]

Socks. I hate wearing socks at night, but recently found that cool feet were keeping me somewhat awake.
Lavender oil sprinkled on the pillow sometimes helps.
Nothing sucks more than being wide awake and tired when all your loved ones are dozing soundly...

[hedra]

Yeah, I agree that sleep deprivation is KILLER.

So, if you're going to use the dream feeds, which you maybe CAN do, see if you can use them as a path rather than a solution, maybe? Like I said with the moving the timing - the goal being to extend their sleep, yes, but keeping it a temporary process toward that goal.

And trust me, I overthink things to do with foods and body cues, having had the eldest in a feeding clinic. There's some flex in the system, really! I was trying to illustrate my thought process, NOT trying to get you to emulate it.

I do try to keep their sleep and my sleep separate issues, kind of along the lines of 'whose problem is this?' and owning that it's my problem if they're happy with the sleep they get. BUT, that doesn't mean you don't sometimes have to get help from them to solve your problem, if there are no other useful solutions without their help. That's okay, too. Separate the initial part, then recognize that you're STILL working in a family unit, and that means adjusting various things for various parties sometimes, even for one person's problem.

If you can get a night or two of sleep (as we had someone a while back who we all basically said 'go sleep in a hotel for a couple of nights!' - whatever, so you can get some good sleep), your brain will kick back in again for problem-solving in a way that works for you all.

Hang in there!

[caramama]

sam - I second the partner/friend/nanny/someone taking a shift. It was the only way I could get through the really tough months. My husband would take the first shift with the baby, and sometimes I'd go to sleep right after putting her to bed so I could be assured of a good chunk of actual sleep. Then I'd take the shift after a certain time and he could get a good chunk of sleep.

I didn't exactly do the dream feeds as you are talking about, but my girl was especially good at sleeping while she nursed. So when I was "on duty" and she woke up, I'd bring her into bed (we have a twin bed in her nursery) and cosleep with her, letting her nurse while we both doozed and slept. I would just stay there with her till morning. I don't know if that helps, but that's what worked for us.

For the record, she ended up night-weaning herself. I have no idea if it was because of the system we had in place or just she was ready. But she did do it, and she sleeps through until 5 or 6 these days. I now know that this is a huge blessing at her age (almost 1 year), not a given that all babies will do it at this age. But I really believe it will happen eventually and there are ways to help you get there.

[jenjen30]

I have a 13 month old son who has never slept through the night yet.....not even once!!!! The problem seems to be maybe a combination of things. Because of limited space in our house his crib is in our bedroom. My husband sleeps like a rock and I am a very light sleeper. It seems to me that my son seems frustrated or irritated when he is sleeping. He moves around a lot in his crib and seems like maybe he is trying to get comfortable. First the DR. thought acid reflux, then seperation anxiety, and then they wanted to do an ekg and we decided against that because he had one at 4 months because he had sleep myoclonis and they wanted to make sure it wasnt seizures he was having. All that turned out fine. I dont know what is wrong with him and I feel bad for him because he just tosses and turns all night and wakes up a few times every night and cries til I reassure him and sometimes I even have to rock him back to sleep. Obviously I am exhausted which is causing me health problems I think. I have no energy and sometimes I fall asleep so fast or even while rocking him, before he falls asleep, then other times I cannot sleep at all. I had to get on an anti depressant etc. I guess I am just wondering if anyone has experienced this or if anyone has any tips. My son is very high energy, VERY high energy! Sometimes I wonder if some of the things he does are normal behavior, such as the way he throws everything when he is playing, and he throws hard! When he gets mad I can hardly hold him down to dress him or change him, he has a very bad temper. Most of the time he is happy and loves attention and he likes to show off and hes the sweetest little thing. I worry about the way he hits himself sometimes, especially if he is tired or trying to get my attention. His new way to get my attention is to gag himself. I am a stay at home mom so he gets tons of attention but he is very demanding. He just seems very aggressive for his age to me. I will definatly discuss this with his Dr. but I just wanted to see if anyone here could relate to any of this. I feel like I am doing something wrong sometimes. I would really appreciate your input.......thanks

[sam]

@jenjen30 - I have no advice to offer, but maybe you could email your question to Moxie and see if she would post it for others to comment on. I'm sure someone would be able to give you some advice.

Good luck.

[Jordan Spizike]

Kindness is like a large dose of medicine, Is good; fools, Dose is good; just, Dose not, Is hypocrisy.

[tinnitus cure]

I have read some of this post proper here and discovered the idea fascinating and it tends to make numerous sense. As properly as i adore your theme proper here. Thumbs up! Maintain on sharing!

[http://www.amerisleep.com/adjustable-beds.html]

If you sleep on your side, but you curl your head forward, chin to chest, you put stress on your neck and shoulder muscles. You may need to try sleeping on your back (put another pillow behind your knees if you do so to keep stress off the lower back). If your pillow doesn't work in this position, try a rolled up bath towel.