Q&A: fussy baby while nursing

N writes:

"My four month old and I got past the initial difficulty beginning nursing (pain, latch problems, mastitis, the usual suspects) and we were off to a really good start with the whole breastfeeding thing.  She is gaining well and healthy.  But she often does this thing at the breast that drives me crazy.  She kicks, screams and thrashes while nursing.  If I hold her where her feet can hit the back of the chair, she'll kick against it, moving her whole body away from the breast while she's latched on (not pleasant).   If I position her where her feet can't kick against the chair, she'll instead scream and whip her head back and forth while latched on (also not pleasant).  Taking this as a sign she's not really hungry, I'll take her off the breast, which is met with shrieks of protest.  Put her back on the breast, we get a repeat showing of Wrestlemania: Baby Edition.  It doesn't seem to be a low supply issue as it's always easy to express milk when she's doing this, but I don't really believe it's that the let down is too strong for her either. Her older sister did this too when she was nursing, but this one is much worse about it.  I can't quite figure out what's going on here.  Any suggestions?  I've been stretched about as far as I can be - literally!"

Yeah, I remember this. I think it may be some kind of gastrointestinal growth spurt of some sort, but it was perplexing because there were no other symptoms of other gastric distress--no excess farting or crying 20 minutes after a feed (the classic symptom of a lactose intolerance) or anything like that. It sounds like you don't ahve any of this other stuff either, just the donnybrook on the breast. I never did figure out what caused it, and it went away in about a month or so on its own.

In the meantime, what I did was try to put as much pressure on my son's tummy as possible while he was nursing, and for whatever reason that seemed to work enough that he could finish an actual feed without going all Goodfellas on me.

The way I did it was by doing all my nursing (except for the middle-of-the-night nursing, which didn't seem to bug him) reclining on the couch. I'd have him facing down on top of me, stretched across the length of my body, perpendicular to me. So we were a lowercase t, and I was the vertical line, and he was the horizontal line across me.

That meant that he was nursing face down, but he also had all his own body weight on his tummy on top of me.

I have no idea if this will work for your daughter, but it's worth a try. Readers, can you offer up anything else that she can try if my tummy-pressure thing doesn't do the trick?

Comments

[Linda]

My daughter had a similar problem, and it turned out that she had reflux. What was most confusing was that she did not have any of the classic symptoms of reflux. I was able to do some research on "silent reflux," go to the pediatrician with this information and get some medication for her. Initially, I was hesitant to give medication to such a tiny baby, but it worked wonders and she was much happier. Also, I had described the symptoms to the doctors before, but they had never suggested that reflux could be the problem; I really needed to learn more about it myself and advocate for my little one in this way.

[hedra]

It's not unusual for kids that age to have reflux, by the way (for something like 96% of kids with early symptoms, it goes away by a year). Silent version is much more common than you'd think, and even the silent version can surge into non-silent (that is, uncomfortable) at times. The tummy pressure may speed gastric emptying, reducing the reflux issue, so that might be the same issue. Another thing to try is nursing more upright (that is, baby more upright), and straighter.

The pushing back and arching is classic for reflux, by the way.

G had silent reflux, and wasn't even a spitty baby. No notable signs at all, and didn't even develop the sinus congestion sign until he was over a year old. If you suspect reflux, do consider an early dental checkup, because the fumes can dissolve enamel in a pitting pattern that then results in insta-cavities. BTDT, two kids with no enamel on their back teeth or the back sides/edges of their front teeth (all uppers), major dental work even the second child (knowing it would be an issue didn't entirely help, but did get us in there for care early).

[Cheryl]

I'm having a problem with my 4 month daughter, too. She cluster feeds in the evenings, and she will not nurse. She screams and hollers and shrieks until we give her a bottle. I don't pump (mastitis issues), so we give her formula. It's kind of disconcerting to give a breastfed baby up to 8 oz of formula in the evenings, but it's the only thing that keeps her happy. Sometimes I'm able to get her to nurse after she has about six ounces of formula, just so I can go to sleep empty, but sometimes it's a struggle.

When she wakes up for her two am feeding, she nurses just fine again.

When she's so hungry, it's like she won't even bother with the breast because it takes more work for her. Grrr.

[Diane]

It could have been me writing this 14 months ago. Other posters have touched on the reflux, so I'll tell you my little anecdote. Until my daughter was about 15 months old, she didn't want anything putting pressure against her feet. If her feet could touch something, her instinct was to push against it as hard as she could. The only way I could nurse her was in the middle of the bed or couch, with her feet propped up on my arm. I remember it was around 3 months that she became so impossible to nurse, I had to switch to pumping full time.

And Hedra, thank you for the information about the reflux and dental issues! I wish I had been aware of this sooner. I'll be sure to mention it to the dentist when we take her later this month.

[Laura]

I don't have any real suggestions, except to say that Moxie's nursing position sounds like a recipe for mastitis. Nursing with pressure on the breast ALWAYS set me off with a plugged duct. :)

Also keep in mind the 4-5 month wonder weeks turn them into wee demons.

[julia]

My son did this exact dance, and it was silent reflux. Within 24 hours of getting medicine (Axid, if I recall correctly), we were fine. It lasted about 6 weeks, and we were finished.

[paola]

Both my kids carried on like that when they were around 4 months old, which coincided with the start of the warm weather as both were January babies. With the first one, I was certain he didn't want to nurse because it was getting hot and the contact with my body was bothering him. The exact thing happened with my daughter but I realised it wasn't heat related as we were having a relatively mild spring. I read in The Wonder Weeks that around 16 weeks, babies lose their appetite and so understood it wasn't due to the heat, but something all 16 week olds go through. I noticed a repeat of this behaviour with all the major fussy periods for my second child.

[Helen]

In short: 4 month olds are monsters! I found this behavior went hand-in-hand with the big developmental spurt. We solved the nursing behavior by nursing her while on the move in a carrier (wrap or sling) or lying down in a dark room. For some reason lying down really helped. I don't know if the mechanical effect of that position was just the thing to take the edge off the tail end of the overactive letdown we'd been battling. 4 months was also the beginning of serious teething for us (my daughter cut her first 2 teeth at 5 months). Teething made her extra fussy for sure.

OP did not say if baby also gets bottles or has started any foods (don't if you haven't) - these things could also be a factor.

Moxie, I just wanted to address your line about lactose intolerance: this is a common point of confusion. It is highly unlikely that a baby that young is lactose intolerant. True lactose intolerance would have been present from birth and most likely part of a larger metabolic syndrome that would show up as part of the newborn screen. Kellymom has some great articles on this.

It's far more common for babies to be somewhat affected by casein they get from a mother's breastmilk after the mother has consumed dairy. The effects can range from fussy to severe distress. Dairy also may aggravate reflux if it is present. If that is the case, the mother eliminating dairy can have dramatic effects, although it sometimes takes up to 4-5 weeks to see full results. Again, lots of info on Kellymom on this, including lists of hidden dairy ingredients.

We had to eliminate dairy at 2 months (copious spitting up, blood in stool, rash, general discomfort symptoms that mimicked reflux), and the difference was vast (although it still did not fix the 4 month fussies). But it became a bizarre personal pet peeve when people would say "Oh! She's lactose intolerant!" As if there weren't lactose in breastmilk!

Good luck, OP. If you feel in your gut that something is really off, do get her checked out medically. Although if a doc gives you the "allergic to your breastmillk" line, drop kick the doc and head for a good LC and read Kellymom.

[Madelyn]

We went through this -- it lasted maybe 3 weeks. I just tried to pin her as best I could and hoped that the phase would pass soon. Great mom, huh? I didn't even suspect reflux!

[Erin]

My son did the exact same thing at 2 months. I called my lactation consultant and she said he was ramping up my supply for a growth spurt but hadn't caught up to the increase in milk and speed of letdown yet. He also had silent reflux, and it was much worse during this time. Thankfully, he grew out of the nursing problem in a few weeks. It was a TOUGH few weeks, though...

[Lauren]

What about swaddling?

[Wendy]

We had this problem from 1-4 months. It was terribly frustrating. In the end, my daughter just grew out of it without much intervention beyond stopping bottle feeds altogether and exclusively breastfeeding (which I think reduced the gas in her tummy), and giving her gripe water occasionally before a feed (after which she would burp and then feed more calmly). But a great suggestion was given to me by another mom who is a homeopath after my daughter seemed to get better, which was baby acidophilus that you can order on the internet. She said that gastrointestinal issues that have to do with gut immaturity can be mediated by the introduction of friendly bacteria that can help metabolize the milk. I think she was right, because the end of my daughter's problems correlated with a change in the frequency and texture of her pooping (ie. less frequent and less runny). Wish I had known that before! But maybe give it a try and see if it works for your baby.

[tina]

A couple other commenters have already touched on this, but I would look at sensory stuff as well as reflux. Who knows, maybe it's both issues at once! Right around 5 months they start to wake up to the world and pull off to look around while nursing, maybe N's baby is ramping up to this, or is just one of those babies who reacts strongly to certain sensory input. So possible fixes might be to nurse totally swaddled up, or totally sprawled out--lying down if possible, or using pillows instead of an arm to support the head. You might also try tickling her palms or gently scratching her fingertips to distract her from the other sensations.

[Sidney]

This happened with both of my girls. With my eldest it was a major milk allergy and it started much earlier then 4 months, if you had something like that you would have other signs (we had blood in the stool and rashes). With my youngest we just got thru it, I used a boppy pillow and I would rest one hand on her tummy and make sure she had nothing to push her feet against. It is like wrestling, except they have your boob in your mouth and they don't want to let go! It will pass, sounds like you are doing great otherwise! Enjoy your little baby!

[michelle]

Ah, I just went through something similar to this three months ago. My daughter would thrash and pull when she was nursing. When I took her off the breast, she would scream. It was miserable! We discussed this with her pediatrician, who diagnosed her behavior as "textbook case" of silent reflux. The Dr recommended that we continue to breastfeed her, eliminate dairy from my diet and give her zantac. After two weeks or so, my daughter greatly improved and would nurse without stopping or pulling.

Give your pediatrician a call.

[jane]

My daughter did this exact same thing. The doctor suspected reflux and possibly milk digestion problems. We started her on Prevacid and I cut out all dairy from my diet. We quit giving her Prevacid around 6 months. I gradually phased dairy back into my diet around 8 months and she did fine. Another thing that worked for us was for her to nurse in an upright position. Basically she sat on my lap facing me, I supported her body and she nursed. It's not the best position for nursing in public, but it helped her nurse without screaming and also helped her spitting up. Good luck; I remember the frustration!

[giddy]

I don't remember either of my kids going through this, but I will say that it never hurts to try ALL the nursing positions. One that might help here is to put baby on the floor on her back, and actually lie more or less on top, straddled however you have to so that you are not crushing her. This way, she can't pull back, and you can probably arrange your arms around her head so she can't pull from side-to-side either. Of course, if it IS a reflux issue, then this might not be comfortable for her.

But it's always worth trying different positions just to see. I suppose she might kick you, though. Maybe this one not worth it. But I'll leave the post in case it gives an idea to someone else struggling with a different problem.

[pixie]

wow, wish i had read this 2 months ago. i asked my pedi and he was useless. My girl for about a month would pull back hard on the nipple, kick with her feet and push if she hit the arm of the chair, and poke her belly up. She doesn't have reflux, nothing was apparently wrong and she was no more gassy then normal.

It passed on its own, I was so mad because i had a very hard time BFing in the beggning, and then around 2 months stuff was great, so when it went bad again i was angry becase i put so much hard work in to it, i refused to stop. She's 5 months now and only occasioanly does it which I think is more now from anger about how fast or slow my flow is at that moment for her liking... like at night I'm more empty and she likes to eat a lot at night so my boobs tend to piss her off at night. But then she just wines and pops on and off.

[Heather]

When my son was this age, it was about the time that my oversupply finally slowed down. I think he was mad because he'd finally learned to deal with being overwhelmed with milk, and was now ticked off that it wasn't coming fast enough. When my milk let down, the thrashing would (almost) subside.

My son also had what we thought was reflux, but it was just due to my oversupply. I would pump off a little before many feeds (especially those after more than 4 hours) and that made a huge difference. And on the plus side, I had lots of milk stored up.

[pixie]

oh and like a previous commentor I also just gave a bottle at night to save my boobs and my sanity.. and it was formula most times because i was to tired or lazy to pump. She liked the bottle at night, and nursed fine in the middle of the night and mornings.

[bree]

Yeah my son did this too. He went through one phase where he would only nurse lying down, and another where he had to have his head elevated (I would position myself lying down between two mounds of pillows and prop the elbow that was cradling him on the pillow to keep his head up). I think I also had a time where it helped to have him lie on his tummy on top of me to nurse.

Probably this is a phase that will pass. It sounds like you've got a more extreme version of the 'donnybrook' but it does sound like typical behaviour for that age.

[Melba]

My daughter did and still does this, even though she's bottle fed. In fact I think its a big reason I couldn't breastfeed. We had thrush and a painful latch and I had severely cracked, bleeding, infected nipples. My munchkin just couldn't sit still while nursing and she "chomped on" to the breast. Seriously, she tugged and pulled and chomped and its no wonder I had such problems.

Once I finally gave in and switched to bottle feeding (heartbreaking - I was so set on breastfeeding) she still did it. Squirming, pulling, turning her head every which way, flayling about during every feed. She's 8 months old and still does it, but there is nothing medically wrong with her. Its just her personality. She just doesn't want to miss anything and I think she sees feeding as something she has to do, not something she wants to do, because she might miss out on the world. A pin drops and she's yanking her head around to see what's going on. And she's done it from day 1!

[Joy Gittings]

Ditto Linda,
My third did this at the same age. My ped prescribed a little Zantac for reflux, which she took for 3 or 4 months, then didn't need it anymore. Wrestlemania, baby Edition, HA!!

[Simone]

Reflux was the culprit for us. And pain while eating and general fussiness was the only way to really diagnose with #2 for us, because he was a "silent spitter" (never got past his throat, so we didn't immediately see that he was spitting up). Worth checking into. We were on Prevacid with #1 and first Prilosec and then Prevacid with #2, off by 6-7 months with both. Good luck!!

[lulu]

My four month old has been doing this for a month. I have found feeding him after naps when he is calm helps a lot. As does feeding in a quiet room away from distraction.

[Shelby]

What Moxie did is what is actually recommended for a fast let-down. Let gravity help out by nursing lying down...

[caramama]

Yeah, we went through this for months also, but it was especially bad right around 4 months. I asked the doctor about reflux, but they didn't think it was that (I even mentioned silent reflux). I think in our case it was just the age/wonder week thing, when she is going through a growth spurt and her digestive system is working itself out. Actually, our doctor said to me that this is the age where they are working out the digestive system stuff. It resolved itself on its own mostly.

To get through it, I sometimes swaddled her, sometimes walked while nursing her, sometimes just let her "go all Goodfellows" on me (usually with a bobby or something between us). I second the trying other nursing positions, also.

You know, we're actually going through similiar issues now. What I've been doing lately is letting her play with my hair to distract her from wanting to sit up or fuss or wrestle or fidget.

One last thing, we did notice that baby was more gassy when I would eat onions, and that would aggravate the issue. So do think about your diet in relation to when it's worse with your baby.

[Cloud]

I'll second Caramama's comment about thinking about your diet. I had to cut back on garlic for a few months as well as go off of dairy. I'm happy to say that I'm eating both again now, with no problem. Baby's digestive systems are immature, and things that bother them when they are 4 months old will probably be fine when they are a bit older. Our problem was more gas after nursing than trouble while nursing, though.

Pumpkin has always been an "active" nurser, in that she needs to be doing something with her hands. I just let her pull my hair, or if I'm lucky, get her interested in pulling on my shirt. And I let her kick her legs around- I, too, have gone to a nursing in open space rather than a chair. It sounds like your baby is more active than that, though, and I don't really have any advice for how to handle that. Good luck and hang in there!

[taylor]

My daughter has been doing this too. She is just 5 months old today and i have found that it helps if i actually hold my breast to her mouth - kind of like you did when you first start nursing. I hold the breast with the opposite hand and then kind of pin her legs with my elbow- this sort of helps to settle her down but it takes perserverence!! If she struggles off we take a break and then try again. And i make sure she can't push her feet on anything like some of the commentors above (like the arm of the glider - we sit angled with her feet out). Keep trying as this phase seems to be passing.

[wavybrains]

I'm going through this right now! Baby's almost 5 months and likes to do the back stroke while nursing, pulling, grabbing, pinching, kicking. Holding her hand helps. She's also very fussy during the day too--lots of yelling. We think maybe teething? She spends a lot of time sticking things in her mouth, and tons of drooling too. I think maybe reflux, but DH isn't hip on medicating her. We have a script for randtine (sp) from the pedi, but we haven't tried it yet. I don't want to medicate her if this is just a five month thing, but man, is it ever hard.

[pnuts mama]

i'll bet folks are right on about the reflux or the diet- however, i will throw in our experience of pnut being an early teether (4 months! how nice!) and that was an excruciating experience for her- with her ped's permission i gave her tylenol to help all of us get through the worst of those days...and it definitely did help!

but my moneys on the reflux!

[Eva]

Both my kids went through a crazy fighting while eating thing around 4 months. By that time I wasn't nursing anymore but they were already really comfortable with the bottle. We tried Zantac with both to little/no effect. It passed is ~3-4 weeks. With any future kids I plan on just riding that one out.

[Sue]

Sorry if I"m repeating; no time to read all comments --

At a little older than that, I started nursing my son while both he and I were sitting up. He sat facing me and I, uhm, cupped myself up a little so he could get a good, uhm, head-on, positioning. It was as if I was saying, HERE - yes, THIS is what you're doing now :-) It worked for us. Feeding this way in the parking lot at the supermarket was interesting though... (but it can be done).

[Melissa]

Only one of my four kids has had reflux, but I can remember at least two of the others doing this same thing around four months (one of those being my current four month old!).

Going back to swaddling (just while nursing) worked for one, lying down to nurse worked for the other.

[Julie]

Around 4 months my milk really gushed in and that became a huge problem for us....that combined with the fact that he was getting too much foremilk and not enough hind milk which gave him bad gas. I wouldn't rule out overactive letdown as the culprit, as this is when mine really hit - exactly the 4 month mark. Talk to a lactation consultant and have her check out what's happening. It might be a combination of many things and you'll want to address them one-by-one.

Good luck. It's frustrating.

[carmen]

I remember something similar around 2-4 months. He did have reflux so it could have symptoms of the reflux bothering him (although meds didn't seem to help all that much).

I think I ended up nursing in a recliner with a boppy pillow. When he was super wiggly I would pin his legs against me with my elbow behind his knees while he laid on his side facing me. He still fussed and squirmed but didn't kick me repeatedly so it helped me keep my sanity. It always seemed to coincide with the 6pm-12am fussy time for the little guy.

Changing nursing positions, reflux meds, not nursing... none of these things really stopped this phase with him. We did notice that when he would lie flat on his back he was miserable so in general he was upright until he was almost 4 months old. I think its the reason why he rolled over later that other kids... not enough unrestricted floor time.

Don't miss those days. Hang in there. As with every other unbearable time with my son, it passed. I think having a baby is just kinda sucky until 6 months. Just survive until then!

[angie]

both my babes did this i would just give them (and me) a short break during the nursing session by giving a soother...this seemed to ease the frustration a little.

never knew about silent reflux until baby #2. i cut out dairy and caffeine and found that the bicycle leg massage (baby lying on back, pull one leg straight and push other leg into belly, alternate) really seemed to calm him down.

[angie]

oh forgot to mention that both babies at this time (4 months) started nursing for shorter periods of time - maybe your baby is full?

[carmen]

Another thought just occurred to me... does she eventually calm down after nursing for awhile (awhile being 5-25 minutes)? Big boy sometimes acts really frustrated and pulls back and stretches me out until he has started to feel satiated. Maybe she's impatient waiting for the first letdown or additional letdowns.

Just a thought.

[wealhtheow]

My kiddo (3 months now) was doing this before we started him on meds for reflux.

[ritchiegal]

i could have written this-- Chicklet, @ 3 months, is doing the exact same thing: flailing while she's on, freaking out when i take her off, and being unhappy about either situation.

knowing my kid (it all depends on the kid, right), its a combination of distractible baby and teething. she's definitely more of a chewer/chomper now than she ever was. plus she's so curious about EVERYTHING, that i think feeding for her is something she "has" to do now. her feedings seems to be getting shorter-- about halfway through she starts to look around at the wall, my shirt, anything that catches her eye. she eats just enough to sate her hunger, but then she's starving by the time she thinks to eat again. then she gets pissed off that she has to wait (GASP) for let down.

wow... what fun.

[Andrea]

It's amazing that SO MANY OF US experienced something like this around 4 months, but very few of us were able to get useful answers from our pediatricians. Nursing more upright as well as holding Tree Faerie more securely helped us get through it.

[Kathy]

My daughter had silent reflux and the pulling off, kicking, screaming started for us at 2 months. But, reflux peaks between 4 - 6 months, so even babies with less severe reflux issues have trouble during this time period. The right dose of prevacid did wonders for us. HTH!

[Nancy]

We went through this type of epic battle starting at around 6 weeks and for us, it clearly seemed to be flow-related. It started with the evening feedings (aren't those always the worst?!) and then moved earlier and earlier in the day. In the beginning it was mostly kicking and scratching and pushing back in frustration (if I didn't keep her nails trimmed, she looked like she got in a cat fight!) and then eventually turned into hysterics.

Taking her off only made it worse, of course, but then when you'd try to put her on again, she'd refuse to nurse unless there was immediate flow. Very very hard and very sad. Eventually she went on "strike" altogether and we ended up giving her a bottle, which she drank in 2 seconds flat and has since never had a problem with (which seems to rule out reflux?).

Interesting to read so many references to reflux here. Funny that this type of battling seems to be a fairly common reaction, for whatever reason, and yet I couldn't really find anything about it at the time!

[noodlemama]

I'm with the fast letdown/supply issue theorists on this one. Particularly significant to me is the OP's history of pain with latch-on in the early weeks and now this WWF behavior. I had the same things going on.

If you compare the lists of symptoms of reflux vs. hyper-letdown on kellymom, you will see some overlap and some differences. What finally made sense to me is a link from kellymom that describes the cause of pain in the mom when the baby is dealing with fast letdown: a diligent sucker will clamp down on the nipple to control the flow like you use your thumb on a garden hose. Ouch! I had problems with that for the first 10 weeks until the baby mouth/letdown interface improved. Then we were golden until around 4 months.

NB: Righty always overproduced even more than Lefty. So in the early days, Noodle chomped and injured Righty more. Then, around 4 months, she started to refuse Lefty and would only start nursing on Righty. I think she got used to the fast flow and wanted it during a growth spurt. She also discovered that by playing rough, she could cause multiple let-downs. I think she was basically causing more let-downs to signal an increased appetite.

My fabulous LC recommended double feeding (the same boob two feedings in a row) for a few days in a row anywhere after the first couple months. This helped regulate the overactive letdown. Then, during the 4-month crazies, she had me feed one-boob per feeding (but alternating from one feeding to the next) to ensure the Noodle got the hindmilk and to ramp up production. This only works if you feed on demand and feed a little more frequently during the fussy days. Once production is up, you can try to restore order once more. Feeding lying down in the dark and Australian-style (mama down under) also helped.

Oddly, I saw the same behavior one time (screaming, arching back, kicking feet) in the highchair when we started solid food. I thought the Noodle was rejecting the cereal and so I moved on to breastfeeding and she calmed down. We happened to be videotaping this solid feeding for the grands. When I reviewed the videotape it was obvious that the Noodle actually was really hungry and PO'd the little spoon wasn't coming in faster. This baby wanted MOAR! FWIW, that's another reason I suspect this behavior is related to wanting more milk, faster.

Sorry for the book. Hope it helps. This was the toughest period for breastfeeding after the 1st several weeks. Subsequent growth spurts were much easier to deal with.

[Tabetha]

I thought it would be important for many people to realize that this is a very important time period for you and your infant in that suddenly your baby's demand has changed and your breast milk is either trying to catch up or slow down. Every single mom reports almost exactly the same thing at exactly the same time: 4 to about 10 weeks.

In my case, I was making too much foremilk and she wasn't get enough of the hind milk to satisfy her growth patterns.

Try this for 2 days: Nurse exclusively on ONE breast for 2-4 hours. So, every time she is hungry, put her to the left breast. After 2-4 hours, nurse exclusively on the RIGHT breast. This will also help for moms with too-active let down that babies don't like. You should see results very quickly.
This enables her to reach the hind milk faster and will adjust your milk flow for the baby.

I IMPLORE everyone to go to the La Leche League website, as they are the definitive source for everything breastfeeding related. They have a huge online library that is easy to access and can answer nearly all of your questions. If you can't find it there, then call your local LLL leader. They are available night and day for anything you might need!!!

Too mnay people are too eager for a quick fix (like drugs for acid reflux, which seems odd to me since breastmilk has so many healing properties, so I will never understand how it could cause reflux...) and if the drugs don't work, then they quite all together. This is a challenging time, but I PROMISE that once you get through it (2-4 weeks max), you and your baby will be happily nursing the day away.

[Laurel]

I am right in the midst of this lovely period. It's potentially more difficult to cope with after weathering the storm of the first three months, establishing breastfeeding, napping starts to come online, you get a few glorious weeks of routine then WHAMMO!! It's all goes to hell.

My now 4.5 month old son started to get very fussy at the breast at about 3.5 months. The back arching, screaming, shoving, popping on and off the breast, nipple pain, oh how it comes back like a horrible flashback. He would get very very frustrated if I didn't let down immediately. He'd start screaming and I'd get tense, making the let down even more delayed. We were in a baaad cycle. I tried every position, soothers, swaddling, soothing music, low light, same location every time I BF, and it got worse and worse.

Then, last week, he went on two nursing strikes. The first was 9 hours, and the second 12. When he started moving in to the realm of getting dehydrated, I caved and gave him a bottle. He was previously getting 1 bottle at night. I stopped the bottle because I thought he was developing a preference for the bottle and didn't want him to wean so young.

Our ped. said the symptoms sounded like he needed more that I could produce, so we started supplementing with formula (soy - both me and DH are lactose intolerant). I thought his strike and fussiness eating was because he wasn't getting enough and that he'd developed a preference for faster flow. I saw a lactation consultant and she said the same. He prefers thee fast flow of the bottle.

Now, I'm mostly bottlefeeding breastmilk and formula. He's had so symptoms of silent reflux with the bottle, making it unlikely that is the cause of the problem. I think he was pissed off with the slower flow and work of breastfeeding.

So now, he's bottle feeding and slowly rejecting the breast more and more. What can you do. I tried.

I've been pretty upset about this but I feel like I've done everything I can. I'm going to keep trying to BF him every day but I have a nasty feeling it will be for naught.

I now reminisce about those lovely days when BFing was a calm and lovely experience together. He'd finish a breast, smile at me, then munch on the other. memories now...I guess.

[alice]

i'm there too! my baby is nearing 5 months. BFing had been going great, but now he tugs on my nipple (ouch) and pops off after a few sucks. also, often he seems to decide he'd rather suck on his nuckles or his upper lip--anyone have any thoughts about that? hopefully, it's a passing phase for both of us...

[gail]

My baby is about 2.5 months and she does this - you would think that she's swimming freestyle rather than feeding. That combined with the utter lack of daytime napping has been, um, an adventure. So it'll pass, right?

[ApplePie]

My 8 week baby did this but luckily we found out what the problem was, and now I'm back on track with breastfeeding. It's bcoz the milk flow is too fast and baby was taking in too much milk, too fast. The poor thing was trying to catch his breathe but couldn't bcoz milk kept pouring in. And when I pulled him off he cried bcoz he was still hungry.

Solution was position him so that he's almost in seated position, to not squeeze breast (hands off), to let him only take nipple and not latch as instructed at hospital (as this only maximises the flow and he was getting to much), and to let him come off and back on the breast (so let him take control). I used to get sore nipples so was scared about trying it this way, but baby isn't sucking as hard because the milk flow is easy - and my nipples must have been conditioned from all the breastfeeding I'd done.

Baby is now enjoying the breast more than the bottle and makes cute cooing sounds while he's on the breast. Good luck to all - I know how frustrating this can be.