Q&A: How long can the swaddling go on?

If you live in the US and can, please vote today!

I still don't know why it's happening, but I keep getting questions in clusters. I've gotten a few recently about how long you can swaddle a baby. A couple of the parents are wondering if they can still swaddle because there's nothing else that gets the babies to sleep, but the parents are worried that the babies are too old for swaddling at 4 months.

(Are we surprised that a big sleep dilemma is rearing it's ugly head at four months? How convenient that that's both the time kids are having sleep problems leading up to the 19-week leap, and also the time when popular culture tells us our kids are supposed to be sleeping perfectly after going down awake and if they're not it's our faults. Sheesh.)

There was also a note of confusion in two of the emails because the babies were still calmed by swaddling, but would then work their ways out of the swaddle in the middle of the night. Without the swaddle, the parents had a hard time getting the babies back to sleep, but the swaddle didn't take. It was a big conundrum wrapped in a Catch 22.

I don't really have much about swaddling. My older son was an anti-swaddler. I think he was just so happy to have room to stretch out finally (he was 9 1/2 pounds at birth) that there was no way he'd have submitted to a swaddle. And my second one was OK with the swaddle, but it just kind of faded away after a few weeks.

It's my gut feeling, though, that nothing bad is going to happen if you continue to swaddle your baby until s/he stops responding to it. Assuming your baby gets plenty of time on the floor with his or her arms and legs free during the day, swaddling isn't going to prevent them from developing physically. And if it gets the baby to sleep at night, hop on it.

One of the writers said "Right now I feel like he will need to be swaddled until he is 3 years old" and that made me laugh, because when kids have that three-year-old sleep refusal thing (we could call it a sleep regression, but that makes it sound all babylike and genteel, which it's not) wouldn't it be awesome to just swaddle them in a big blanket and have it actually work? Maybe I'll add that to the list of Kid Products That Would Sell In The Millions If Only They Worked.

Now, that doesn't help the parents whose kids are wiggling out of the swaddle. That, to me, seems like the signal that the swaddling days are over. But how to transition to something else. My suspicion is that it can take weeks or even a few months, like some kids waver between one nap and two for weeks or months and are miserable nappers during that time. But, again, I've never lived it.

So, swaddlers and former swaddlers of the internet, give us some data points. When did you stop? Did your child fade out of it? Did you make a deliberate decision to stop? What did you do instead?

Comments

[Natalie]

We swaddled Sprout until he was 5-6 months old. He was big baby, so I bought some soft flannel and made bigger blankets for him after he outgrew his receiving blankets. I think he started wanting his arms free, so we swaddled him from the chest down. And after a few weeks of that, he didn't want any swaddling any more. He has always been very snuggly, and still needs us to drape an arm over his tummy so he can fall asleep (he's just over 2 yrs old).

[hedra]

It's not just our era that was information overload. It's a certain type of cultural zone, because it sure happened in ancient times, as well! Multiple competing schools of thought are clearly mentioned in Soranus's work. It's really illuminating to see him mentioning the women who don't enjoy breastfeeding and would rather give solids at 4 weeks or give the baby goat's milk (he recommends donkey milk as a better option if a wetnurse cannot be found), oh, and the women who struggle with labor because of the fears they've been taught by society, and the benefits of light exercise and the risks of a sedentary and indulgent lifestyle on the pregnancy, labor, and postpartum period... it goes on and on.

Granted, we have an order of magnitude more access to information now, but we aren't the first to be overwhelmed by conflicting advice and information, changing cultural expectations, changing medical knowledge, and experts after experts all insisting that their way is the best way and that your child will be harmed if you do it that other guy's way. The 50's may have been a haven of simplicity by comparison to now, but that doesn't mean it was always 'simple', or ever simple for long.

[Melissa]

Swaddled for a few months, but she really seemed to hate it. Tried the sleepsack the first winter, but she didn't seem to like that much either. Now it's winter again, and she will NOT have covers touching any part of her (though she'll burrow into me when she gets cold, so guess who else doesn't get covers? sigh). She even pulls her socks off when I remove her shoes to change her diapers. So I usually wad them up and throw them at her - a small stress release for me and a great big giggle for her. Win - win.

Don't do what you read/hear/are told is right. Do what works for you and your baby. If you read all the comments here you'll notice the wide range of ages that swaddling worked or didn't work which is the answer that applies to every situation: every child is different!

[Christianna]

We totally freaked about this too. After our son got too big for the swaddle blankets, we just wrapped him in a receiving blanket to sort of contain his limbs while we rocked him before sleep. When we laid him in his crib, we tucked the blanket under his arms (not an ironclad swaddle by any means but it kept him snugged up enough so he could fall asleep). Our pediatrician told us, "He will let you know when he doesn't want to be swaddled anymore." And it just sort of stopped being necessary around 7 or 8 months, I think. I would definitely not worry too much about swaddling too long. If that's what they need to fall asleep, then that's what they need.

[electriclady]

We swaddled until around 4 months. The Amy Coe for Target receiving blankets were great for swaddling when she was newborn--same size/weight as the hospital blankets (thin flannel). I don't know how you're supposed to swaddle with some of those thick cotton blankets people give you.

Around 3.5 months she was starting to bust her arms out of the swaddle, so we started using this stretchy tummy band a friend of mine sent me from China--it's meant to give pressure and warmth to the tummy area, but it was the perfect size to band around the burrito and keep her in it longer. But then by 4 months she could roll onto her stomach, and no matter how tightly we wrapped her, she'd bust her arms out and flip onto her tummy during the night. We knew it was time to stop when she fought being swaddled so hard she woke herself up (we rocked to sleep, then swaddled her--her arms would keep springing up no matter how hard we tried!).

[caramama]

I forgot to write that we tried "de-swaddling" the Pumpkin two times prior to 4 months, including the slowly weaning parts of her out of the swaddle. It was so miserable both times, we went back to swaddling. It was only her rolling over with her face in the mattress that made it a necessity for us, and we did it cold turkey.

I'm loving hedra's ancient greek OB/GYN advice! What great perspective it gives me! Thanks, hedra!

[rudyinparis]

Kathy B., you are a sweetheart!

[Maureen]

Woah, that's a lot of comments. I didn't read any of them, so I may be repeating someone.

At any rate, I had to go look up in my emails to find out how old my son was when we stopped swaddling, and he was about four months! I remember panicking about it, because my mom kept saying, "You're still swaddling him?" in a semi-horrified tone, but it was the only think that worked for a while, but then he started to outgrow the large size Swaddle-me, and I figured I'd have to transition him. I started putting him down with just his body and legs bound up but his arms free, and then I just left off the Swaddle-me entirely one time, and he was fine. I think he must have fallen asleep in my arms and I just put him down and he stayed asleep.

It was yet another one of those things I worried and worried about, but which turned out to go perfectly fine when the time came. So I think that parents will be able to figure out when the baby is done with swaddling, because the baby will work out of the swaddle and stay asleep, but it happens at different times for different babies. Which is a shock to us all, of course. Babies are different? Who knew?

[julie]

haven't read any of the comments yet so I apologize if I'm repeating.....we used the Miracle Blanket, which looks and seems like a straitjacket, but it was the only thing that kept him in there all night long. He loved the swaddle.....we took him out at 5 months when he began to roll over incessantly - almost like turrets - could.not.control.it. Did it all the time. Our ped told us it was time to stop the swaddle b/c of a safety issue of suffocating (?) if he were to roll over and not be able to get his head up without using his arms. As a first time mom I took it as gospel so spent a looooooot of time teaching him to sleep on his tummy. Without a swaddle. Which was hell for us. Everytime he rolled over onto his tummy he'd wake up and push himself up and cry and cry because he was so so tired. With the second I'm sure I'll not be so anal about it.....but will probably also feel a lot more comfortable letting him/her sleep on the tummy anyways.

So that's our info. We swear by the sleep sack for somewhat restricted mobility - but that's mostly for climbing out of the crib, not waking himself up to sleep. FWIW, I know of a lot of moms who kept swaddling well past 5 months...to almost a year. Do what feels right to you. As ususal.

[liphovela]

We swaddled from the get go and kept it going in some form until 8 or 9 months. Our son really liked it. We would swaddle him tight, take him for a short walk outside, another sure to calm activity, and then nurse to sleep. As the baby got older, he would get out of it. At first, we redid it in the night, then we did it with one arm out, then two arms out. Finally, he just made it clear he was not keen on it any more and it petered out. I would not worry about it.

[Christine]

We swaddled our first until somewhere between four and five months. We knew he was ready to come out when he would work his arms out but still stay asleep.

Our second is almost 6 weeks and we swaddled from the beginning. It definitely makes a difference in her sleep patterns. When she asleep in her bouncy, I notice that she'll occasionally jerk her arms, but not as often as our son did at this age, so I expect she'll probably get out of the swaddle a little earlier.

[Alice]

I swaddled my daughter for 5 months. I figured she'd stop wanting to be swaddled at some point. I too was worried that she was 'too old' for it, until I realized that it's unlikely she'll want to be swaddled at 15. (That's my rule for everything.)

How to keeep the baby in the swaddle, we used our doula's method.
The 'double swaddle'.
Use a smaller square blanket and fold in a triangle and put that on top of the bigger blanket. Have the point facing the babe's feet.
Lay babe in the middle, and wrap one side of the small triangle, over the arm and under the body, and then do the other side. Pull nice and snug, then swaddle the upper layer as usual. It's difficult to get out of that one.

Hope that makes sense.

[Maureen2]

I have twin boys and one had to have the swaddle. The other was a better sleeper from day one but still liked the swaddle as well. We used to laugh that we'd have to swaddle one of the boys until he was 15 because he wouldn't sleep well otherwise. We swaddled I think until around 5-6 months. Before that, if he got out of the swaddle, it was because we didn't do it right. Our doula showed us a great technique and it really was amazing.

My MIL especially (but also my mom to a less degree) HATED the swaddling. For some reason it really bothered them. My mom would joke that poor little guy would wind up walking stiff as a board with his arms tied to his body when he was older. We kept it up anyway cause it worked for us and for the boys. Both boys are developmentally fine now.

As for phasing out - we stressed about this tremendously. We did the one arm out and then two arms out (by this point, it was easier to keep the swaddle on just his body). Stressed for nothing, though, as he's really the one that let us know he was okay not being swaddled and transitioned out just fine.

Good luck. I actually really miss the swaddling. My little burriots were so cute all tucked in and secure.

[Gretchen]

Disclosure: I sell (extremely nice, inexpensive and versatile!) swaddling blankets on my etsy shop. If you're interested, click through to my blog and look for the link on the left side of the page.

The reason I sell the blankets is because they worked so well for us, and the ones that are commercially available are either too specialized or too small. When we started swaddling my daughter, we only had two or three blankets that worked well, and we ended up washing them pretty much every day.

We started swaddling because of The Happiest Baby on the Block, by Dr. Harvey Karp. We had one of the world's most difficult babies (pleeeeease don't ask me about it), and didn't try his method until she was several months old, and the difference was like night and day. She was the kind of baby who woke up when there was any sort of movement or transition, and she used to startle herself awake whenever her arms would flail around in her sleep. I couldn't believe that a piece of cloth could improve my sanity and her quality of life so much.

One thing we did (that Karp recommends, and several nurses have told me, as well) is that when she started to break out of the swaddle and was still whacking herself in the face or startling because she thought she was falling ... a piece of masking tape about 3" long put on the outside end of the swaddling blanket will keep it shut for most kids. If that doesn't work, it's probably time to stop swaddling, or swaddle with one arm out or something.

Once we stopped swaddling, we used the blankets as play mats, diaper changing mats, sun covers for the stroller, props when the high chairs were too large, something familiar to sleep with when we were on vacation, and about a billion other things. We're still using them, now to swaddle her dolls, and make hobo packs to carry toys around, etc.

If anyone is interested in trying one of my swaddling blankets, I'll give you free shipping if you mention that you heard it on Ask Moxie. You guys have been so helpful with the questions we've had in the past - it's the least I can do to pass the love on!

[Eva]

I would have been happy to swaddle much longer, but we stopped at around five months old because she was escaping and I was worried about the blankets covering her face. Also, she could suck her thumb then, and when not swaddled she could soothe herself to sleep much better since she had access to her thumb. So then she slept in sleep sacks and still does at 14 months (though now she's walking we have started with footie pajamas too).

[meera]

i worried and worried that my son would never sleep out of the swaddle. We swaddled him till he was almost 6 months old. I read up all the strategies on removing the swaddle but what worked for us eventually, since he was already getting out of it, was to just let him. We had 2-3 nights of crappy crappy napping and sleeping and then he just figured out how to sleep without the swaddle. I just wanted to post to say, dont worry, they will learn, if they respond well to the swaddle - keep it for as long as they need it!

[AmyinMotown]

Maggie didn't really like the swaddle. My oldest nephew, however, LOVED it and they swaddled him until he was like six months? Maybe even older? He's four now so I don't remember. The only real difference as he got older was they'd leave one arm free so he could roll himself back over if he needed to. He still wraps himself in his blankie at night. he's an average size kid heightwise, a little skinner than average .

[Jen A.]

I had written in about 8 months ago with the same concern. I was worried that the little one would need to be swaddled until he was a teenager. What would you use for that size? Twin sheets? ;)
He ended up getting SO upset when we'd start to swaddle him because he knew he was going to sleep. And, well, that was the end of the world. Who needs sleep when there things that are completely soaked with drool? So when the fighting back with the swaddling blanket became such a manic episode, we quit. That was when he was about 17-19 weeks old. I was always concerned with him hitting himself and waking up, but cold turkey is what worked the best for us.

[Charisse]

We swaddled Mouse until about 5 months, when there was a heat wave and she was hitting that awful zillion-wakeups-in-the-evening phase we were talking about last week. She seemed to sleep just as badly with it as without it, so we gave it up. Cold turkey, I think. Still nursed her down and all, but no swaddle.

Man did she love it though--by the time she was 3 or 4 months she'd relax just at the sight of the swaddling blanket (we used it for calming as well as sleep). I worried for a long time that her latish mobility (sat at 5 months, rolled at 6, crawled at 12) was related to too much swaddling, but you'd never know the difference now.

I remember noticing how soothing Mouse found the whole Harvey Karp 5 Ss method, and asking Mr. C if he'd try it on me--and he thought that was just way too weird (hey sweetie, could you wrap me up in a blanket and jiggle my head?) and we had a good laugh.

[Cynthia]

I haven't had time to read the other posts, so I may be repeating what's already been said. We swaddled until about 6 months. Our daughter seemed to need it to get to sleep and to move into deeper sleep - otherwise she'd jerk herself awake. She'd often work herself out of the swaddle in the night, but that didn't seem to matter. Once she evolved out of the involuntary jerking phase, she didn't need to the swaddle so much so we stopped.

[b*babbler]

Honestly, we swaddled until she was eight months old. It worked for us, and made her much happier. Towards the end, when she started growing out of the swaddle lengthwise, we left her legs out, but she really needed her arms tucked in tight.

Really, until she could safely sleep on her stomach, it was the only thing we could do. She was so very unhappy with her hands just flopping around. Now, at a year, she sleeps unswaddled but always on her stomach with her arms tucked under body.

I don't really think there is a problem with continuing to swaddle as long as the baby is happy. When the time comes, it will likely be a rough couple of days and we unswaddled gradually. First loosening the bonds, then letting one arm out, and then fully unswaddled.

Good luck!

[Suzie Q]

our little one (now a whopping 3 weeks old!) was swaddled from the get-go in the hospital; and at our first doctor visit, the pediatrician told us she NEDDED to be swaddled until 4 months (when we're supposed to start sleep training... whatever). both sources also recommend dr. karp's book -- the hospital even offers a class on the techniques, interestingly enough -- so at least in our little corner of the world, the experts are pro-swaddle.

that being said, our little pumpkin has not been swaddled since her first few days. those damn receiving blankets we got from anyone and everyone are just too small! (i'm talking about the cheap little flannel ones that come 4 to a pack.) they just can't contain my little 8.5 girl... though i really do like the idea, and since she's not the best sleeper on her own... maybe i'll have to look into one of the better blankets you guys have recommended. lots of great suggestions here!

[juniemum]

little one is still being swaddled- she's 9.5months. sometimes she fights it but always settles into it and gets more than 3 hours of sleep at a time! we tried from 4-6 months without it and everyone was so exhausted in the house. one day we remembered swaddling and went back to it and all slept so we figure don't mess with a good thing : ) her legs are free in the swaddle, her arms are what keeps her awake without the swaddle as she flails them around and scratches and scratches at her eyes. she is fed 1x sometimes 2x at night and about half the time I leave her unswaddled if she drifts off to sleep.

[Aaron]

Autumn you are right on. I found myself getting so confused about what the "right" thing to do is because of all the different experts advise. I finally gave up and do what I think is right at the time. I still listen to peoples advise and try different things, but ultimately you do what gets you through the moment and no one is an expert on your baby but you!
Swaddle away!! We don't really swaddle our 4 month old anymore. From about 2 months she started resisting it. She never really liked it from day one as she always got her arms out. We started swaddling her with her arms out and still do technically now, although I don't swaddle her very tightly, I just find it helps to keep her warm.
A note on receiving blankets, homemade are the very best. Store bought ones are way too small. I now make receiving blankets for anyone I know having a baby. Very easy to make.

[julie]

Ahhh. Dr. Karp. Loved his book and that with a swaddle, some pacifiers and a sound machine are my standard baby shower gift.

In fact, I love him so much I stalked him for a little while....we live in Santa Monica, and I have driven by his practice a couple times when things were especially difficult. Just the proximity made me feel better. I never looked into going to him - mostly b/c with all his oodles of $$ and celeb clientele, it's not really our scene plus he probably doesn't take insurance.

But I love him anyways. And just for clarification, I've never stopped the car.....just some slow drive-bys on temper tantrum/demanding days.

[scotti]

Our son NEEDED to be swaddled, even though he didn't always like it.
Three cheers for the Miracle Blanket (I found myself singing, "it's a miracle, a true blue spectacle, a miracle come true").
I also agree that bigger blankets are the key - my mom made some nice flannel ones by hemming a yard of fabric. Now she makes them for all my friends because people kept asking me where to get them.
He stayed swaddled at night until at least 9 months and then at naps until about 13 months - Seriously.
When he got too long for the Miracle Blanket, we just wrapped his arms with it and didn't put his legs in.

[Mandy]

I remember swaddling Em past the typical time....quite a bit longer than 4 months! it caused no harm to her - just great comfort and better sleep.

[andrea]

@Pam (if you're still reading after this many comments), re bigger-sized sleeping sacks:

Grobags (www.grobags.com.au) are made for kids right up to six years old. (Sizing is roughly 0-6m, 6-18m, 18-36m, then in certain designs, 3-6 years). We got one each for our twins from this shop (www.bambinipronto.com.au), but, assuming you're not in Australia, it looks like you can also buy them on eBay, etc. We got the travel ones - they have a vent at the back and a two-way zip at the front to fit a five-point harness so that, theoretically at least, you can transfer the bub right from pram or car seat to bed. They also come in three different weights: 0.5tog for hot nights, 1.0tog for summer/autumn kind of nights and 2.5tog for chilly weather.

[Emily]

We swaddled Ivan until just about a month ago (he's almost six months now). I was tired of trying to wrangle him into a swaddle when he woke up in the middle of the night (he's kind of long, too, which meant his feet were always poking out), and he'd also really latched onto thumb-sucking, so he had that to soothe himself. I was really, really afraid he'd fuss a lot, but he didn't too much. I also let him fuss a little more than I had at around three monthes when we'd tried to stop swaddling before. After about 5-10 minutes, he settled down. I am still nursing him back to sleep when he wakes up, though, so that's a whole other thing to work out. I also try to put Ivan down on his side, because that seems to be more comfortable and an easier way for him to settle down. I also recommend highly putting some kind of lovey -- we use a very soft little rabbit (even though I know we're not supposed to have anything in the crib at this point, SIDS risk and all) for him to finger in the night.

Hope this helps...

[colicmommy]

Swaddling doesn't hurt babies hips...who came up with that idea? My pedi encouraged us to swaddle.

#1 needed the swaddle, otherwise he woke up every 15 minutes, literally. We stopped swaddling at about 5 months, when he learned to roll over. The minute he learned to roll over, he'd flip to sleep on his tummy. I think kids who really *need* the swaddle are often kids who end up sleeping on their tummies. The swaddle tricks them into sleeping okay on their backs for awhile.

#2 was a great sleeper from the start, but then again, I swaddled her from the start after learning from #1. I stopped swaddling her around 4 months, just as an experiment, and she slept fine that night, so bye bye swaddle.

Re: a good blanket. If you can't find a good stretchy HUGE thin lightweight blanket, go to Joann fabric and find the right kind of fabric, then just buy a big length of it. You can cut around the edges with pinking shears (those scissors that make triangles along the edges) and the edges won't fray. Or, you can use jersey knit sheets in whatever size you need.

[EJW]

We had another one that was for sure going off to college in a swaddle. At about 5-6 months, it got too warm and he started flipping onto his stomach and we were too nervous to keep him wrapped up. He just started sleeping through the night, at about 10 months, and I have to wonder if we stopped swaddling too soon.

[Simone]

Sorry...it's late and I have a "date" tonight (with hubby) so I haven't read the comments. BUT, I'm thinking that when I was little, I used to like sleeping in one of those kid-sized sleeping bags on my bed. Now that I think about it, it's kind of like swaddling for an older kid--a more confined space, no way the covers can slip off, a little adventurous, etc. That might be something to try when Baby DOES get to be three+, and still likes that confined security. :)

[Briana]

My baby's also a flailer - goes to sleep fine now that he's past the newborn stage, but he's always thwacking himself awake with his arms.

When I started easing him out of swaddling (I did it up until about five months), I started with naps first (he goes to bed easier for naps than at night). He had been kicking himself out of swaddling for months, but I finally figured out that it would take him a lot longer (long enough to sleep) if I left his legs free and just used the swaddle to hold those flailing arms down.

When he got to be about four months he started to really resist the swaddling, and so I used it less and less, only when I couldn't get him to calm down any other way.

He's just turned six months now, and I don't swaddle any more. My little guy's a terrible sleeper. I would have kept swaddling him except that it seemed to start irritating him and making it harder to sleep after a certain point. Now I sometimes actually hold his arms down gently in the crib until he conks out - he still flails, scratches his face and yanks the soother out of his mouth when he's trying to get himself to sleep.

[Maria]

Our daughter is 10 months, and I still swaddle her. She is a very active baby and swaddling is the way to calm her down, let her know it is time to relax and go to bed. She breaks free from it after a while, but it is definitely the key to putting her down.

[Sara]

We swaddled until about 7 months, thanks to the miracle blanket (a baby straight-jacket, as we nicknamed it). I think some kids need it much longer than others. We finally dropped it because he was such a terrible sleeper (waking every 45 minutes) and was about to outgrow the blanket, so we figured we might as well stop using it at the point when things couldn't get any worse.

He's a great sleeper now, but still prefers to use a sleepsack (at 18months & 35 inches, he's in the XL size), so he's definitely a cozy guy.

[erin]

I love love love http://www.miracleblanket.com/

We swaddled until 5 months or so, and then once or twice after that. I remember being out-of-our-minds tired when she was 9 months old and deciding to swaddle her one night. It worked, though not again after that. I say as long as you don't swaddle them all day it's probably not going to hurt them.

[Anon]

Just a reminder - be careful when using a sleep sack - it is important to put the baby's arms in the holes to prevent them from slipping down into the sack and suffocating.

[Kate]

One kid, one data point.

Lurved him some swaddling. As he got bigger and stronger, though, it wouldn't stay on. Never used duct tape, but an ace bandage around a swaddling blanket works a treat. At about 4 mos, after fighting him to get him swaddled one night, I thought, "Hmmm, what if I don't?" He rolled over onto his stomach, and promptly slept for the longest period of time he ever had in his short little life--about 4 hours.

[Frema]

I'm not able to read all the comments posted before mine, but I'm due next month, and I thought it was worth noting that my hospital doesn't recommend swaddling anymore--our childbirth educator says it can prevent a baby from displaying important feeding cues (sucking on his/her hands, touching their cheeks).

[Jamie]

Hey Hedra?

Have you ever seen "Cassell's Book of the House"? It's this multi-volume book of all kinds of housekeeping information which many, many women were given as a wedding gift in the Victorian era. I just got one as a wedding gift from my now-wife and I was fascinated by how much of the childrearing advice has come back into practice but we're now treating it as some new discovery.

Cassell advocates nursing really aggressively and requires newborns to be fed hourly (no more than every two hours unless asleep) until after they are six weeks old. Also, it is quite clear from the text that they are expecting newborns to sleep in the same bed as their mothers. There is a funny little diatribe about the evils of husbands who balk at this and want to sleep with their wives. I think there must have been some sort of assumption that a husband who wanted to sleep with his wife also wanted to "sleep with" his wife.

[Miriam]

I chortle as I skim through these posts because I think we swaddled until about 14 months, when our son wriggled free. Over time, we went from the tight little "Buddha" swaddle to a "sushi" swaddle, where we left his legs free and used a rolled up receiving blanket tied around the main swaddle blanket over his arms and torso. Looking through baby things the other day as we prepare for the arrival of #2, I also came across a special swaddle wrap custom made by a babysitter who was very handy with the sewing machine. It has two long, wide tails attached. I mention this only because our challenge over a long time was the practical one of how to swaddle effectively, not the ideological one of whether to.

[melissa]

I agree with so much of what has already been said! First and foremost, we definitely have information overload these days. I was just saying my biggest challenge as a new mother is to stop THINKING so much and just DO what my baby needs. I have found that responding to the baby in the best way I can is usually what is right for us (rather than thinking about all the things I "should" be doing based on what I have heard or read). Every time I allow myself to be consumed by what someone else says is right for the baby, I find that we are all unhappy. When I remind myself that my baby is unique and my response to her will be equally unique, we start to find peace again (if only in my own head!) With that being said, we are still swaddling the little one at 5 months (despite good natured jokes from my parents about the cruelty of keeping her arms pinned down). We stopped swaddling with legs in around 2 months and around 3 months started doing one arm out. She has been rolling over for about a month now and she definitely breaks free almost every night, but I feel that she still needs the swaddle to calm her before naps/bedtime and keep her asleep. I think I will try the sleep sack over the swaddle now that it is cold out! Oh, we got our swaddle blankets from adenandanais.com and they are fabulous.

[kate]

Perfect swaddle: Miracle Wrap.

How to transition out: sew up the armholes of a sleepsack for a few months, then undo one arm at a time.

[Melissa]

The swaddle was definitely a fade until one day it just made sense to up and stop.
We continued a loose swaddle after 4 to 5 months until a year (maybe 12-13 mo ?). Then one day my husband just laid her down on her stomach (where she would end up in the middle of the night), and tucked the blankets in around her and that's what we've been doing for the past several months.
I, too, worried that we would never stop swaddling, but then I hearkened to Moxie's advice, sleep how you need to sleep so that everyone gets sleep and make your peace with it best you can.

[Kristin]

We stopped swaddling when the Boy learned to flip onto his belly. I had this idea that I wanted him to be able to get his hands and arms under him to move, once he was able to turn onto his face. Mind you, I wasn't getting this warning from anywhere: just mine own paranoid self. And I sweated bullets that first night without the swaddle...but he did great. And that was that.

[florabora]

Moxy, I'm glad you posted this. I searched all over when we were at that stage thinking, how much longer can this kid be swaddled? We swaddled him until 5.5 months or so - I think I just put him down for a nap on the weekend with out it one day, and he was fine. The whole "put one arm out" tactic didn't work well with him. He was almost outgrowing the Kidoppotomus large sized ones.

He never took to the sleep sack, either - we just put him in fleece footed PJs and that seems to work.

[hedra]

On the information overload, one of the best things I was ever told was 'the baby is the only and best book on themselves. learn to read your baby, and you'll be fine.' There IS a reference book that is right for your child, and it is YOUR CHILD. Which doesn't always help, but when I was wondering what to do and in conflict, reading my child was almost alwasy right, and when wrong, at least wrong for the right reasons!

Jamie, I don't have that, but I'm reminded also of stories passed down in my family... the fact that my great-grandma's midwife ordered 'the usual' keg of beer for postpartum wellbeing and helping the milk come in after her first baby was born, the recommendation to not even get up and move around for 24 hours (to allow the body to relax back into post-pregnancy form), the absolute rules about NOT upsetting the mother because it might make her milk not come in or come in 'sour' or 'thin' (aka 'not letting down easily due to stress'?). Looking cross-culturally is also interesting - the South American admonition that 'machismo comes through the milk' and therefore boys should be breastfed for 2 years, while girls (who should be less bold and assertive as children and adults) are best weaned around a year... So much interesting out there, and so much we think we invented, indeed.

[Zoe]

To the parents looking for something to keep the little diaper but in the air sleeper warm at night, another suggestion is foot Pajamas, they come in all different weights for different times of year and are very comforting and cozy as well!

[Kristine]

My little guy's startle reflex was so strong and it persisted long after the "books" tell you it should be gone. But he is also very strong and busted out of every swaddle contraption we fashioned. When we jokingly considered duct tape, we knew we needed another option. What worked for us was buying an Amby Motion bed. It lulls our son back to sleep when his limbs get all jerky and flyaway. He loves it.

The only issue now is what to do when he outgrows the Amby!

[jamie]

We occasionally swaddled ours even at 5 months. Sometimes they just need the comfort of being closely bound up with themselves, IMO. When she'd have a major meltdown, and my husband was at home while I was working (and him with no breasts...) he had to resort to swaddling her.

I don't think there's anything wrong with it, you all know your babies better than any of those books do. If your LIttle One needs a swaddle, then by gum, swaddle!