4 month olds

I'm really, really behind in my life today. And I've been getting a ton of questions lately from people with 4-month-olds. And there's just so much going on at that age that makes it a tough, tough time--they don't really nap yet, their nighttime sleep is falling apart (thank you 4-month sleep regression), you may be back at work or seriously wondering what made you decide not to go back to work and either way it screws with your head, you probably haven't lost the baby weight yet and don't feel sexy but then there's Scary Spice doing the cha-cha looking like a brick house, and your baby is probably not as fat as your doctor wants him or her to be, and it all just sucks.

A very helpful nursing-related post about breastfeeding at 4 months from CJ:

Things to consider if your four-month-old baby coasts down the growth charts

So I'm going to just open up the comments, and those of you who remember your 4-month troubles, (or are in the middle of them) post them, and we'll all commiserate. I don't think there's much of a cure for most of this stuff except for time and being gentle with yourself, and realizing that you do what works at the time and then when it stops working you do something else. Think about getting sleep today, not what might happen a year from now.

Comments

[DomiNika Dobosz]

my lil one (4 months and two weeks) sleeps fine thru the night but during the day it's a bit of a nightmare. he wakes up every 20-30 minutes. he eats less and constantly wants to be held. it's very difficult since i am a single mommy. i barely get anything done. heh....but it's comforting to read that other parents are going thru this too. thx :)

[Kyle]

i have a 4 month old and she isn't really following anything with her eyes still and she still isn't raising her head that good we are taking her to get her eyes checked out and a MRI just to make sure it's nothing serious cause her doc said it's probably just her slow developing but we'll do the tests just in case.. anyways i was just wondering if anyone on here has experienced something similar with their baby i would appreciate if you would let me know and my nerves would appreciate it also thanks...

[Elena Putman]

My daughter will be 4 months tomorrow and is sleeping well she gets her bath every night at 9:30 just like she wants and she sleeps from 10:30 p.m. to 6:30 a.m. she was 7 1/2 lbs at birth born @ 37 weeks and 5 days she was sent to mission memorial in asheville if anyone wants to know any info. about how i do just look me up on myspace @ nc_girl_2008@yahoo.com

THANK YOU AND HAVE A NICE DAY

[hbrown]

My 13 week old is also starting to experience what I assume is a 4 month growth spurt. She recently started eating more, sleeping more, and is certainly alot more fussy before nap times during the day. She consistently goes down at around 6:30pm every night, but nothing else is consistent. Having to go back to work right now doesn't help too much either.

But one thing that certainly has helped has been all the comments on this thread which remind me that we're not alone and things do get better. I thank everyone for the high quality comments and reassurance.

[FD]

We are in this stage for, let's say...1 month (at least) (Any information about how long this lasts?). Baby girl is today 4 months and 3 weeks old. I feel it is kind of getting better, at least she doesn't wake up every hour to nurse like she did for about a month. But still has problems with falling asleep during the day (it takes about minimum 30 minutes of rocking, soft dancing and singing in my arms - oh my back hurts! so that she sleeps for 30 minutes...) No problem falling asleep for the night BUT (the biggest problem so far) awakes at 5 a.m...not wanting to sleep again until after 2 hours, just for a 30 min nap. Up again, playing (not alone!) etc....Thanks god she is taking a 2-3 hour nap in the afternoon 15.00-18.00 which I think could be responsible for the shorter night sleep but cannot let her without, she is getting too tired, too fussy and too nervous if not sleeping.

Tried to bed earlier, later, found out that she is not stuck with the time (5 am - sometimes 4) but with the duration, namely, 8 hours. When put to bed earlier e.g. 20.00 she wakes up at 4 am....Before this 4month "thing" she slept for 10 hours (of course waking up every 3 hours to nurse).

Don't know what to say: just patience!? I'm totally sleep deprived, moody all day and not a good company..even to myself.

I'm wondering why every "how does your child develop" page or guide says something like this at four months: "your baby is now able to sleep better and for longer periods like 5 to 8 hours"....are they joking???? Who is writing this kind of guides??
The longest period in one stretch I ever saw with my daughter was 4 hours when she was 2 months old...I never saw that again, but hoping...

Very glad I read this article and the comments of all these parents, only knowing that this is some-"thing" that happens at 4 months and not because I do something wrong, helps a lot.

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[Jennifer]

Thank you everyone for your comments. My husband and I are not alone, thank God. Our son's sleep regression began just before the 4-month mark and we're in week 2 of it. We are dying here. The comments and feedback are really helping me get through this!

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[Alison]

So glad to see other families have this "problem". My little girl has never been a great sleeper and now will only sleep 2 hours at a time, nurses every time she wakes (and actually drinks, doesn't just suckle), and will only sleep in bed with me. I've set up a bed for myself in her room. I start her in her crib after she falls asleep in my lap after nursing sometime in the evening (never the same time!), but inevitably she migrates to my bed when the cries start. Still, even then, she wakes up all night long either crying or wanting to play. I'm worried 1. I'll never sleep again, 2. I'll never be able to get her back to her own crib for the night. It does help to see so many other moms in the same boat!

[Kate]

this all really helps. bought Wonder Weeks - that also helped. My 4.5 Month old has turned me into a blithering mess. I am so obsessed with her sleep or lack thereof. Thank you for sharing.

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[catherine]

hi this is my forth child and my second is mentally and physically handicap sounds like it shouldnt have anything to do with the baby but just hang on a sec and you will see where im going, i had a portage worker with my second to bring him on and by four years old he was mentally about 4 months they used a sensory imput box to stimulate him and bring on skills like grabing, reaching releasing not only did he come on leaps and bounds but with all this stimulation slept like a log, my four month old has just started screaming for no reason i can tell, and waking during the night i have put together a new box out of desperation and woohoo worked like a charm i filled the box with things with unusual textures piece of silk, cotton ball, piece of furry material feather things in that vain then i sat him down and went through the feels being careful that things like cotton balls didnt go in his mouth stroke his face with things unmouthable ie feather cotton ball and such, talks or sing if your willing about how they feel and oddly use differnt tone for each feel (i know i sound like a nutcase) but cotton soft gentle tone, silk shiny excited and so on they will lap up the attention sleep well and hopefully learn along the way.

[Steph]

I know this post is older than dirt, but THANK YOU. My little guy just hit four months old, and went from one night wakeup to three. Naps have always been hit or miss, but lately they're a complete miss. I did get a two hour one out of him yesterday, but only by lying on the bed next to him and keeping a hand on his tummy. The lack of sleep and teething is making him a total fussbudget. And my DH picked this week to go to Seattle for work. (OK, it's not his fault, but still.) I'm so glad to know it's normal!!! Doesn't make it easier, but at least I know there's nothing wrong with my baby.

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Don't know what is wrong what is rite but i know that every one has there own point of view and same goes to this one

[Dominica Hagelberg]

My man is 4 months and 4 days old and is in the throes of a major sleep regression- it started getting worse around 3 months I think (but who can remember exact times for anything when you're a new mom, dizzy from sleep deprivation?). Our nights have unravelled and my babe wakes at least 4-5 times a night. He also refuses to go to bed at night until he has been awake well over 2 hours and I have nursed him at least twice within that period. But strangely our days got better while nights were getting worse. UNTIL TODAY. Little guy won't take his afternoon nap. He just won't. He'd rather cry and scream and kick and punch in his crib.

This page is a life saver and helps remind me that this too shall pass!

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Thanks for taking the time to discuss this, I feel strongly about it and love learning more on this topic. It is extremely helpful for me.

[Rebecca]

My son hit 3.5 mon and his sleep fell apart. So far, he wakes up all night, won't be put back down in his crib and has now decided to play at 2:30 am. The only thing that works is cosleeping. But I don't want to get him used to it. Every week it gets worse. It's been 4 weeks. I feel like I don't want to be a mom, that I am starting bad habits. How friggin long will this last?

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